Super Effective
by RunsWithScizors
Summary: Having a Gym Leader father isn't fun, but Brendan can live with that part. He can even live with the writer girl next door and her dad if he has to. But evil is brewing in Hoenn, and it might take a little more than the power of friendship to stop it. Good thing Brendan and May have more than that up their sleeves. (Emerald version)
1. New Neighbors

**It started with a joke, an affectionate parody of all the Black/White version adventure stories being made at the time. Then that got a sequel, which developed into a series. Now, the sibling team that brought you "Not Always Black and White" is proud to introduce their _fifth_ Pokémon fanfic together.**

 **There's a funny story in this, too. Back when we were writing the original outline, we planned it to be without shipping. That was before we played the remakes. Once that happened, she got into Shivermetimbers, I started thinking Contestking wasn't a bad idea, and then I decided to take her "shipping square" (four characters she can pair off in various combinations) and use the least-popular ships on there for laughs. So now it's packed with pairings, but it still doesn't qualify as a romance.**

 **Well, that's enough out of me. Let's get this thing started.**

Brendan hadn't liked the idea when his dad had chosen to become a Gym Leader. Norman was a good trainer, he knew that, but to move the whole family across the ocean to a new region? And now, halfway through the move itself, it was just as he'd imagined it.

And, on top of that, what in the world possessed his mother to make her son ride in the moving truck? Each time the truck made a turn, the bitter child found himself imagining that a box would come loose, crushing his head under its weight. Each time, he reminded himself that his mom had _some_ concern for his safety and had checked the security of each box at least twice.

Finally, after what seemed like eternity but was likely only a couple of hours, Brendan felt the moving truck come to a stop, and the door open. Realizing his freedom was just a few steps away, he jumped out of the truck to find himself face-to-face with his mother.

"It's such a shame we couldn't all live together in Petalburg," she sighed, as if that was an appropriate way to start a conversation with the son she'd carelessly tossed in the truck like a possession, "but your dad should be here fairly often. And who knows, maybe in a few years we could pack up again and join him!"

Brendan made an unimpressed sound as he moved back to get a few boxes, but the mover's Pokémon beat him to it. When he stepped out again, his mother was on the phone with her husband, sounding upset.

"You aren't even going to help us move in?" She sighed as the man started explaining. "Of course I understand, Norman, but...yes, Brendan's being difficult..." she held out the phone to the boy, who stared at it for a few seconds. "Your father wants to talk to you."

"Tell him I'm unpacking." And Brendan went up to his new room, the one good thing about all of this.

The room was already done, and on the wall was a clock his dad had given to him back when they'd still been on speaking terms, before Norman had taken a job as Petalburg City's Gym Leader and dragged his son away from the small Johto town he'd called home for twelve years. Now, Brendan just set the clock, placed it back on the wall, and headed downstairs.

Most of the downstairs area had been set up already, and his mother was watching the TV. "Brendan!" she called, proving she noticed her son. "Come quick! Maybe your dad will be on!"

Rolling his eyes, Brendan joined his mother in front of the television, where the program on Petalburg Gym was just reaching its end. His mother sighed and switched the TV off.

"Maybe we just missed him," Brendan suggested, and his mother brightened a little.

"You know, Brendan," she said, much to his annoyance, "one of your dad's friends lives right next door. He has a daughter about your age -"

"Let me guess," Brendan interrupted. "You want me to go and meet her, be her friend, fall in love with her, marry her, and we'll be a perfect, happy family."

The look on his mother's face made him wish he'd stopped talking. "Brendan," she said in the tone reserved for mothers when their sons are acting out, "I know the move has been difficult for you, but if you keep acting like this you will never make new friends, and you will die as the grumpy old man who yells at small children to get off his lawn."

"All right, all right," Brendan said, pulling his bag over his shoulder. "I'm going. And I'll hate every minute of it."

His mom's anger instantly melted into a bright smile. "That's the spirit."

* * *

He had to admit, the fact that his father knew Professor Birch was actually pretty cool. No sooner had he broken into the house than a woman who had to be Birch's wife and the girl's mother approached.

"I'm not a thief," he said immediately. "I'm Norman's son."

The woman smiled. "Oh, I know. Norman's told my husband so much about you. My daughter is upstairs in her bedroom, I think. Why don't you go and say hi?"

"That's why I came over," Brendan said, and headed upstairs.

He couldn't miss the daughter's room - it had a sheet of printer paper taped to it, with the words "May's room" written in pink bubble letters, surrounded by doodled flowers. He knocked twice, but no one answered. Hoping that May wasn't getting dressed, he opened the door a crack.

She wasn't there, but a red and white ball was sitting on her rug. Her room was just as undecorated as his own, except her closet was wide open, spilling piles of clothes while the hangers were left bare, and her dresser mirror had stick-on jewels stuck to the edges. There was absolutely nothing interesting besides the ball.

Someone cleared their throat behind him, and he turned to see a girl about his age with her hands on her hips, glaring at him with sharp blue eyes.

"Don't you know it's rude to break into someone's house, even if you don't steal anything?" she demanded, and Brendan quickly introduced himself. May became less skeptical as he explained, but the annoyance clearly didn't go away. "I was excited about making a new friend, but now I have to get some supplies for the mission Dad gave me. You can go talk to him, if you want."

And she slipped past him into her bedroom, where she started putting tiny notebooks and pencils into the little bag around her hips. Brendan's disinterest switched to curiosity - she'd seemed just as reluctant to talk as he was. Perhaps they did have something in common after all.

"May?"

"Yes?" She picked the ball off the floor and turned to look at him.

He thought better of it. "This counts as a meeting, right?"

She seemed to understand that he wasn't here of his own free will. "It does," she said after only a moment to think it over. "Bye."

And he turned around and left, heading over to find Professor Birch. Perhaps he'd give Brendan a similar mission, and he and May could slack off and get to be friends. Just like his mother wanted.

* * *

"Help me!"

Brendan heard the call, and rushed out to the route to Oldale Town, where a man was being chased by a Zigzagoon.

A _Zigzagoon_.

There were no words for how stupid Brendan found the entire situation.

The man caught his eye before he could walk away, however, and Brendan couldn't pretend he didn't notice. "Please! Help me! In the bag, there's a Pokeball!"

"You can fight off a Zigzagoon with your hands," Brendan protested, but the Pokémon let out a noise very similar to a bark, and the man backed up even more.

Brendan rolled his eyes again before reaching into the man's bag, searching for anything round. He felt something, pulled it out, and threw it with all his might at the wild creature.

Instead of catching it for the man, however, a small orange chick popped out, pecking at the air. The Zigzagoon, diverted from its prey, jumped at the thought of being in battle and bounced over to be the Torchic's opponent.

"A battle, huh?" Brendan could deal with that, at least. "All right. Torchic, use...any attack that does damage!"

The Torchic, though it wasn't a Pokémon caught by or for Brendan, decided it would obey without hesitation and scratched at the Zigzagoon with its sharp feet. The Zigzagoon whimpered but attacked with a Tackle of its own.

Scratch...Tackle...Scratch...eating Oran Berry before Tackle...

"You needed saving from this thing?" Brendan demanded of the man, who coughed nervously. He tried to step away, but the Zigzagoon growled at him, and he returned to his position of fear.

However, one more Scratch defeated the Zigzagoon, and, unable to continue battling, it sulked away, leaving the man to congratulate the boy on a job well done.

"In fact," he said, "why don't you come down to my lab? I could use your assistance, since my daughter isn't...well, let's just say that she's not quite as interested in my research as she used to be. You're Norman's boy, right?"

"Yes." Brendan braced himself - he knew what was coming.

"I thought so. I've only met you once, but you have your father's talent for battle." Yep, there it was, right on schedule. "I'll meet you in the lab, and we can have a talk."

And he was gone, leaving Brendan with the victorious Torchic.

* * *

At his mother's insistence, Brendan returned to the lab, where the professor was talking with his assistant. Birch cut himself off mid-sentence, greeting Brendan with a "Don't touch anything."

Brendan, who had been about to press a button to see what kind of science it did, reluctantly put his hand down.

"Why did you want me here?" he asked, and Professor Birch led him to a small table near the back of the room.

"I want you to have the Torchic you battled with," he explained, handing Brendan the ball. "It was supposed to be for a Pokedex adventure, but May was this year's chosen carrier -"

"Because you're prejudiced to your own blood," Brendan said under his breath.

Birch didn't even pretend he couldn't hear it. "I can assure you, it was because she asked me for it. Constantly, for a whole week, but she asked me. She has her own Pokémon with her, so I don't feel bad giving you this one."

"And what about the others? Don't I get a choice?" He probably would have gone with the Torchic anyway, but the professor didn't know that.

"After seeing how well that Torchic battled with you, I don't think you should."

That wasn't fair, but at least Brendan got the Torchic. "So I have a Pokémon now," he said to himself, accepting the Torchic's ball and letting it out. "What do I do with it?"

"You could start by giving _him_ a name."

The Torchic looked hopefully at Brendan. Brendan considered it, then reached down to pet him.

"I think Adam would be nice," he finally said. When the Torchic didn't react negatively, Brendan figured he liked it, too. "So where do we go next?"

"Well, if you could bring May back, that would be a start. She isn't aware of this decision, and I'd like to let her know that she isn't alone. But if you could just not tell her about the Zigzagoon..."

"You got it," Brendan promised. He hoped the professor couldn't see his crossed fingers.


	2. Partners in Crime

**EDITOR'S NOTE: "There's a slight chance that May shares my bad writing habits. This is one of many reasons I like being a few chapters ahead of the audience."**

Brendan accepted the professor's request, and had been given a route that May was likely on. With Adam, he didn't have to worry about being ambushed by wild Pokémon, and made his way up to Oldale Town with no trouble.

Oldale Town itself was a different story.

"What's wrong with these people?" Brendan asked, though he wasn't completely sure that his new Pokémon could hear him through the ball. He'd just been ambushed by a Pokemart worker, who had handed him a free Potion before going back into his building, and then he'd taken a wrong turn and ended up being pushed aside by a man who was saying something about rare Pokémon footprints.

"You'll understand someday," the man had told him, before getting back down to keep sketching.

So, Brendan was on his own. He didn't even have a map to point him in the right direction.

"Maybe she got forced into going a certain way, too," he continued, as if Adam was perfectly capable of hearing him. "Straight up to the next route, then?"

There was no answer. Figuring it was a yes, Brendan headed north. Better to be the lost new kid than the guy that talks to himself.

After all, it's not like the son of a Gym Leader didn't have his famous parent's reputation to protect...

Well, it wouldn't be the first time Norman had to pick him up after a court-ordered therapy session.

* * *

He didn't really recognize May when he saw her under a tall tree. Her mouth was tight and her eyes focused, her fingers moving the green, sparkly pencil across the page of a tiny notebook. Then, with no warning, she stopped writing and frowned.

"No," she finally said, staring blankly at the page. "He'd never say that. I could _make_ him say it, I guess, but then people would..."

"Something tells me that this isn't Pokedex research."

May squeaked and, to Brendan's surprise, threw herself over the notebook before closing it. "Don't do that! The stuff in here is only ideas - they're not even rough drafts yet!"

"I wasn't asking if I can read them," Brendan reminded her. "I am kind of curious, though. What is it?"

May sat there in silence, looking up at him with distrust in her eyes. "It's a short summary for a fan fiction story that's shipping my fan character and...um, the cute trainer from Space Heroes. Ken."

Brendan wasn't sure, but that sounded like a very bad idea. "You're shipping the character with _yourself_? Isn't that the first rule against fan fiction writing?"

The distrust turned to anger. "For your information, Brendan, not every fan-made character is a self-insert, even if they have a romantic aspect. Sometimes the romance-influenced character being shipped isn't the writer's type at all." She shoved the notepad into her hip bag. "And other times, such as this, the character is meant to be a false-lead love interest for the real character before the real character realizes he or she loved another canon character after all."

Ok, so fan fiction was a touchy subject for her. He'd lay off it. For now. "Your dad sent me," he told her, and her anger faded. "I think he wanted us to battle, or something."

"He gave you a Pokémon?" May's eyebrows scrunched in thought. "I didn't think it was that time of year already..."

"I fought a Zigzagoon off of him. That isn't important."

"My dad had trouble with a Zigzagoon?" May rolled her eyes, and her entire head went with them. "Of course. I turn my back for ten seconds and he cheeses off the wildlife." She stood up, brushing dirt from her legs, and reached for a ball. "Jerry, take the stage!"

The Pokémon that popped out of the ball, this 'Jerry' creature, was nothing more than a Mudkip with a wide smile. Brendan knew that there was a type disadvantage, but he wasn't hoping to win. He just wanted to let Professor Birch know that he'd made a good decision when he gave him the Torchic.

"Adam, do the thing!"

* * *

"So," Brendan said as they sat at a table in the Oldale Town Pokémon Center an hour later. "A writer, huh?"

"I'm working on it," May said, rolling an empty Pokeball around on the table. "That's why I asked my dad if I could get a Pokedex early. There's all kinds of interesting things in the registration, even if some of the urban legends are horrifying."

"He must read your stuff, then."

May got a little red around the ears. "No," she admitted to the table. "I haven't even told him I write yet. He'd want to read it, and that's what I'm scared of. I told him I have diaries, not stories or books of made-up magic spells."

"He might have read it already," Brendan suggested, and May squeaked again and hid her face in her hands. "How many books do you have?"

One eye peeked from between her fingers. "Only a few," she promised. "Seven, maybe eight? Nine if you count the idea book you saw me scribbling in."

"You have eight stories going?"

"It's how I do it. If I hit a wall on one, I pick up another and move through a cycle."

"What about deadlines?"

"I'm not published yet," May reminded him. "I still have time to complete a story before I put it anywhere. But enough about my work. What about you? Why are you on a journey?"

Brendan and Adam shared a look of confusion, then turned back to May. "We're not really on a journey," Brendan finally said. "I just picked Adam up to defend your dad, and he just handed him over."

May laughed, dropping her hands. "You could have fooled me. You're a natural battler."

"Maybe it's the Gym Leader's son thing."

"Maybe." May pulled her idea book and pencil out, and started writing again. No comments about going into professional battling himself, like he tended to get from adults. Maybe she got recognized by her family name and was asked about research the minute people noticed that she wasn't stupid.

If so, then they should start a club.

* * *

The lab was waiting for their return, but luckily, Professor Birch didn't seem to have gotten into any more trouble. In fact, he went right up to his daughter and asked her how it went.

"He beat you on his first try?" Birch turned to Brendan and grinned. "You must be lucky. May's been helping me with my research for a long time - since she was just out of diapers!"

"I don't think you should count wrestling tame Poochyena off your papers as helping, Dad," May said quietly, shuffling her foot. "It's more that I've been playing with the Pokémon left in your care since I was born."

"You've still had Jerry longer than he's had his Torchic."

"Only a few days."

"And for those few days, you were the best trainer in Littleroot Town." Professor Birch reached into his lab coat and handed Brendan a device. "Anyway, back to what I was originally going to tell you. I got this Pokedex for my research, but I think you'd be a better fit for it than I would. It's a little early, but I'd like to ask you to go on a journey."

There was no reason for Brendan to take the offer, unless you counted taking the Torchic as absolutely needing to take the challenge that came with him. But, for the few seconds he really considered it, he actually wanted to accept from the start. A journey meant he could prove that he could look out for himself...

"All right," Brendan said, not even questioning how the professor would survive without him to bail him out of Zigzagoon-infested situations. "I'll do it. May can even come along if she wants to."

May's head snapped up. "I can?" she asked Brendan, and, before he could answer, she turned to Professor Birch. "Can I, Dad? Please? Jerry and I can keep him safe."

"Of course you can go. I gave you the Pokedex, didn't I?" He leaned back, watching them appreciatively. "You two could learn a lot from each other. My daughter and Norman's son...I don't think the world stands a chance against the two of you."

And there was the mention of his father again. Maybe there was no avoiding being on the 'professional battler' career track.

Well, being _honorary_ Champion didn't sound too bad.


	3. The Petalburg Gym

**In which Brendan comes face-to-face with his father sooner than he'd planned.**

Brendan decided to stop and say goodbye to his mom first, just because he knew she'd track him down anyway. May agreed that it was probably better than leaving with no warning, so she handed him a few Pokeballs and told him she'd meet him on Route 101. Brendan watched her go into her own house to tell her own mother that she'd finally started her journey, and then his front door opened.

"So," his mother said, as if it had only been a few minutes since she'd last seen him. "How did it go?"

"I'm not sure," Brendan answered, "but I have a Pokedex now."

"That's a good thing, isn't it?"

"I think so. I got a Torchic out of it, at least."

That was the wrong thing to say. Brendan's mother went from curious to excited like he'd flipped a switch. "A Pokémon? Could I take a look?"

There was no harm in that, really. Brendan released his Torchic, who seemed less concerned than he should have been to have a strange woman staring at him. Eventually, she saw what she wanted to see.

"Your dad's going to be so proud," she said, as Adam hopped back to Brendan. "You really do look good with Pokémon, Brendan."

"Don't tell Dad about this, please." Brendan had that look in his eye that promised trouble. Norman swore he'd been born with that look in his eye. "I want to surprise him when I go in for a badge."

"Only if you promise to come and visit once in a while. Having a Pokedex is no excuse for staying on the road until you're old enough to have a house of your own."

Brendan didn't answer that, only turning when he heard footsteps on the grass behind him. May smiled at her new friend and his mother, before focusing entirely on Brendan. "Ready to go?" she asked, and took Adam's enthusiastic chirp for a yes from both of them. "My mom knows I'm going, your mom knows...let's go surprise your dad!"

"Can we wait to surprise him until I've got my first seven badges?"

May had a moment of confusion, but shrugged it off immediately. "I don't see why not. Now come on! Wild Pokémon are waiting for us!"

Brendan's mom laughed. "Have fun, kids. Good luck."

* * *

Brendan made it to Oldale Town before he was stopped. This time, May was the one that stopped him, with a hand on his shoulder instead of a shout.

"My dad wanted to upgrade your PokeNav," she explained, holding out her hand for the device in question. "I got caught up in the excitement of leaving Littleroot Town and forgot. It'll help you recognize what Pokémon live in the area."

"Don't I already have you for that?"

"In case of separation, Dad said." May rolled her eyes, but pressed a few buttons on Brendan's PokeNav and handed it back to him. "Once that finishes downloading, you'll have a record of what Pokémon we've encountered in each area."

"How?"

"Magic, probably," May shrugged. "There might be some kind of science-y explanation, like wireless links to the Pokedex, but I don't really know."

She dragged him over the 'rare footprints,' which Brendan thought looked a lot like shoe marks, and onto the next route, where she immediately stopped.

"Don't make any sudden movements," she hissed, her eyes focused on a patch of tall grass. "And please, for the love of all things shiny, _keep your mouth shut._ "

Brendan took her advice, staying as still as he could and not making a sound more than breathing. He didn't know what she saw, but her light steps were nearly silent, brushing the grass as though she herself was a Pokémon - a predator after her prey. Then, furthering the comparison, she pounced.

The Surskit she was after slid away, but it reacted defensively, which seemed to be what she was going for. "Jerry, take the stage!"

The battle was fast, and it ended with a red and white ball closing on the Surskit, shaking twice, and going still. May turned to Brendan with a light in her eyes from her new catch.

"And that's how you catch a Pokémon," she said, trying and failing to suppress a smile. She picked the ball from the ground and called her Mudkip back into his own, before sliding back to Brendan and promising to let him take the lead.

* * *

A few battles later, the two made it to Petalburg City. They planned on healing their Pokémon and heading straight through Petalburg Woods, but it seemed that there were other plans interfering with that.

"That was a good battle," the man was saying. "You raised your Pokémon well. You just didn't raise them enough. I look forward to battling you when you and your Pokémon are ready."

The challenger didn't seem offended, instead giving a quick "I will sir. Thank you for your time" and leaving. Brendan had planned to keep May still for long enough so that the Gym Leader would be going back.

Norman, on the other hand, knew his son when he saw him.

"Brendan, don't hide. You're not on the run from the cops, are you?"

Brendan stepped out from his hiding place, forcing an awkward smile. "Hi, Dad."

So much for the surprise.

Norman didn't bother to ask about Brendan's Pokémon, instead looking over at May. "May Birch?" he asked, and she confirmed it. "Your father didn't say anything to me about you coming."

"I only got my Pokedex a few days ago," May admitted. "And I told him I wasn't interested in Gym battles."

"So you're going to do what instead? Help your dad with his research?"

May shrugged, staying quiet. Norman turned his attention back to Brendan. "Did you get a Pokedex, too?"

"And a Pokémon," Brendan added. "I was going to surprise you when I got seven badges and challenge you for my eighth, but I guess that's blown now."

"Um...Mr. Gym Leader, I'd like to get a Pokémon, please."

The voice was new and unexpected, but the boy it came from was even more so. Small and pale with green hair, he looked almost like a Pokémon himself. Norman seemed to recognize him, though, which was more than what could be said for our heroes. "Oh, um...Wally! I thought you were already gone."

Wally looked down at the floor. "Not yet. I wanted to get a Pokémon to keep me company. I wanted to ask if you could catch me one."

Norman stayed silent, before announcing a different plan altogether. "Why don't you have my son and his friend come along to show you how to catch a Pokémon? It would be good for them, and for you."

"I already showed Brendan," May tried protesting, but like most adults, Norman had authority and knew how to use it.

"So you already know how to be a teacher." Norman laughed and waved her on. "You'll do fine, May. And here, he can borrow a Zigzagoon from the Gym."

He gave Wally a Pokeball, another ball containing a Zigzagoon, and a Potion for emergencies, before sending him on his way, May tagging along.

With them gone, he started the conversation with his son.

"I know you wanted to battle me for your final badge," he started, "but I'm the one that allows Surf. So why don't you make it your fifth, and in exchange, I won't go easy on you just because you're my son."

"Why not?" Brendan complained.

Norman ignored him. "Fortree, Mossdeep and Sootopolis all have Gyms, but they all need Surf to reach. So does Dewford, but there are boats around here. You'll be facing me last of all the 'mainland' Gym Leaders."

It sounded like a fair compromise. There shouldn't be any harm in that.

* * *

"So what did Wally catch?"

May had returned with strange confusion in her eyes, giving Wally plenty of strange looks that she'd thought hadn't been noticed. Norman hadn't commented, but Brendan wasn't letting it go.

"A Ralts," May finally said. "It's supposed to be rare, but we take three steps into the grass and BOOM!" She talked with her hands, Brendan noticed, wondering why it took him until she'd nearly hit him in the face to see. "I guess I should be relieved that it wasn't a shiny he caught on his first try, because wild shinies are, like, _stupid_ rare, but I've never seen a wild Ralts, either."

"Some people catch shinies on their first try," Brendan pointed out.

"Not _normal_ people," May insisted.

It didn't matter to Brendan. The fact that a trainer had Pokémon at all was more important than the color they were, as even shiny trainers agreed. May must have just been upset that her first catch hadn't been shiny.

"I haven't seen a Surskit other than yours," he said, and she rolled her eyes.

"My Surskit is great, yes. Where are we going with her?"

Oh, so Surskit was a girl. She hadn't mentioned that part. "My dad suggested Rustboro City. It's the closest Gym to Petalburg, and I can make my own first catch in the forest."

"Rustboro City," May said, as if the name was new on her tongue. "I heard the Gym Leader uses Rock-types. Are you sure Adam can handle that?"

"He might not be able to, but if I catch a Grass or Water-type, I'll win anyway."

"Then Rustboro it is," she said, but she really wondered if type advantage was really enough to win him his first badge.


	4. Super-May and Brendanman

**These two should never have been released upon an unsuspecting Hoenn.**

The road to Petalburg Woods didn't have much, only a few trainers and wild Pokémon. It was just like any other land route in the Hoenn region. Or at least it would have been, if not for the old man and the Wingull by the only house they could see.

"Don't make eye contact," Brendan hissed as May lifted her head, just in case. "We don't need his help."

"Did your dad warn you about this guy?" May asked, her voice barely audible.

"No, but do you want to find out if he should have?" Brendan pulled her along behind him. "Just keep your mouth closed."

May figured he knew best, and followed his advice. She didn't speak again until they were nearly in Petalburg Woods.

"The Wingull was cute," she finally admitted.

"So catch one yourself."

"No. Pelipper loses that cuteness. That doesn't stop me from liking it, but owning one..." Her fingers twitched as she tried to find that perfect word. "I need to read a dictionary or something, words aren't coming to me."

Brendan turned back, meeting his companion's eyes. "I thought you were a writer."

"Why do you think writer's block happens?" May snapped back. "They'll come to me eventually, I just can't think of them right now."

"Excuse me!" a young lady called, getting the attention of both. "Would either of you be interested in a battle?"

Deciding that any excuse to drop the conversation was a good one, Brendan released Adam and left the topic alone.

* * *

The first thing Brendan did when they entered Petalburg Woods was leave May behind.

He didn't mean to, he insisted later. He was just attempting to chase down a Pokémon that had crossed his path and jumped into the grass. May didn't believe him, not completely, but when he showed her his new Shroomish she couldn't find evidence otherwise.

So now they each had two Pokémon. Brendan had a Shroomish to help him with the Gym, but Adam was still stubbornly refusing to evolve into Combusken no matter how many Bug Catcher teams he roasted. The new trainer was starting to make a list of pros and cons for catching a Slakoth (the one con being "They're really slow") when they saw the man.

The man wasn't anything interesting. He wasn't tall, but he wasn't short. He wasn't thin, but he wasn't fat. The only remotely interesting thing about him was that he was wearing a business suit in a forest.

They, as young, unsupervised trainers, were much more interesting to him.

"Have you seen a Pokémon called Shroomish anywhere?" the man asked. "I wanted to catch one on my lunch break, but I haven't found one yet."

"Not one that doesn't have a trainer," May said, a technically true fact, as she tried to slip past the man.

"That's too bad. I really like that Pokémon."

"So why don't we make a trade?" a different, rougher voice asked. A young-looking man wearing what seemed to be a pirate costume had popped out of nowhere, and Brendan wondered why he hadn't noticed his arrival. He should have stolen everybody's attention from the second he was within visible range.

"I was going to ambush you when you came back to work," the pirate said, "but waiting for you was taking too long. Now, Devon researcher, hand over the Goods!"

Brendan and May had no clue what the Goods were, or why they had that particular name, but the way the man hid behind them as they watched the exchange told them that they should probably pay more attention.

"You're trainers," the man told them. "Help me, please!"

"This doesn't concern them! This is just you and me!"

"You don't look that scary," May commented. "You're just a guy in a pirate suit."

"I am not just a guy in a pirate suit! I am a member of Team Aqua, and my name is Benjamin!" He reached for a ball. "You'll eat those words, little girl. Poochyena, go!"

May wasn't even concerned as she reached for a ball of her own. "Surskit, take the stage!"

* * *

Surskit had a Bug-type move on her, and with the type advantage it didn't take long for the Poochyena to fall. The man (Brendan had forgotten his name already) was out of Pokémon, while May still had Jerry in reserve.

"I'll get you for this!" the man promised, but when Surskit slid toward him he stepped away. "I'm out of Pokémon right now, but we will meet again! Keep your Devon Goods, I'm out of here!"

And, grumbling all the way, he stomped through the rest of Petalburg Woods.

The man looked up from his troubled fetal position. "You saved me," he said, clearly in awe of May's skills as a trainer when, in fact, the man had only had one Poochyena. "Like a young, powerless superhero. I'd like to give you one of these as thanks. It's a Great Ball I planned to use to catch that Shroomish, but I have others."

May took the ball, and put it in her bag. She'd need a better one eventually - already, her notebook and pencils were straining their pocket. But she thanked the man for the gift anyway, and he, too, disappeared into the woods.

That's when Brendan started speaking again. "That was one of the weirder parts of today."

"You're telling me." May returned Surskit to her ball. "Well, I'd say we're about halfway through the forest. My dad always says that running into strange people is the perfect way to tell you're going in the right direction."

"Your dad would know, wouldn't he?" When May didn't look impressed, Brendan started moving ahead. "We've both got training to do for the Gym challenge. I know you want to find inspiration or whatever instead of enter the Hall of Fame, but I'm going to be borrowing your Pokémon and for that, we need to keep them properly active, too."

"Brendan, we can't even trade until you have the first badge."

"That's not a real point, May."

Recognizing that she'd run out of arguments, May let him take the lead again. For a few brief seconds, the two walked in near silence, but when his friend was startled by the cry of a wild Zigzagoon, Brendan had an idea.

"Hey, May?"

She didn't want to answer, but she knew he knew she had heard him. "Yes, Brendan?"

"Do you do horror stories?"

"Not really," she said, trying to keep the worry out of her voice. "I like writing happy endings, not guts and gore. I can do creepy, if I try, but I don't trust myself to scare my nonexistent readers yet. Why?"

"I've got a story for you, that's all." He gestured around the area surrounding them. May saw nothing but grass and trees, but Brendan had another thing on his mind. "The forest gods are pretty peaceful today. Maybe we should change that."

Was he serious? She really didn't know him well enough to tell. "I'm not angering some evil spirits just for something to write about, Brendan. I'll save that for when I do enough research on the paranormal to actually protect myself from their twisted imaginations."

Brendan's mood dropped at once. "So you know the stories of the forest gods, then?"

"I said I don't _write_ horror," May reminded him, and pushed herself forward. "I went through the Littleroot Town library's entire selection of scary kids' books a few years back. Now, Surskit needs a Pokémon Center, and Adam and Shroomish might, too. Let's go and make a strategy for the Gym Leader first, and then we'll set some ground rules for our partnership."

Not liking the sound of that, Brendan slowed his steps to keep up with her.


	5. Berries and Badges

**Type advantage gets everyone far. It also gets us out of writing long, drawn-out battle scenes.**

By the time they stumbled out of Petalburg Woods, confused and tired, it was past their internal bedtimes, and they wanted a much-needed rest. Unfortunately, the first people they found were not helpful at all.

While they had trespassed onto the property of the flower shop with no trouble at all, the three sisters that lived above the shop had mistaken them for burglars, and they had a very unusual punishment in store for burglars.

"Please," Brendan begged, nearly falling out of the chair they had forced him into - if they were going to hold people hostage, shouldn't they attempt to tie them down first? "I'm a Gym Leader's son. I haven't stolen anything since that incident with the bottle of soda pop, and as far as I know, my friend here hasn't stolen anything in her life."

The punishment hadn't seemed to affect May in the same way, or at all for that matter. In fact, if Brendan hadn't caught on to the flashes of awareness, he would have thought that his companion had fallen asleep with her eyes open. But her glass-eyed stare went completely unnoticed by the florist sisters as they continued to go off on a completely memorized recitation of berry types.

Yes, berry types. What berries were for healing status effects in battle, which ones made Pokémon more friendly, and which ones were completely useless in anything besides food.

"Why don't you call the Petalburg Gym," Brendan suggested. "And if my dad's not there, call Professor Birch. Come to think of it, just skip right to the professor, he knows his daughter never hurt anybody." Or so he hoped.

One call to the professor later, and Brendan and May were set free. The rest of the trip to Rustboro City was made in peace, at least until May opened her mouth.

"That was an unusual punishment," she commented, following only three steps behind Brendan. "What happened when you stole the soda?"

Brendan turned his head, and she instantly shut up. "How did you tune them out?"

So he didn't want to talk about it. She could respect that.

* * *

The morning they woke up in Rustboro, Brendan didn't know where he was.

He remembered he was in Hoenn. It was hard to forget, though his mother stuffing him in the back of a moving truck was something he would usually put in a dream. But he forgot that he was a trainer now, and that he was on a journey.

He'd promised to battle his father one day. That wasn't an experience he was looking forward to.

But by the time he met up with May, who was waking herself up by having her Surskit use a gentle version of Bubble on her face, he'd resigned himself to dealing with it all.

"We're going to do some training before we go to the Gym," Brendan told her as he shoved an entire granola bar into his mouth. "If we can get Adam to evolve, we'll be making progress."

"And what if we don't?"

"I still have Shroomish."

May turned her Surskit around, pointing the Bubble attack at him.

The training on Route 116 was productive, at least. Two and a half hours into training, give or take a few minutes, Adam finally, _finally,_ evolved into Combusken. More importantly, he learned Double Kick, which would definitely be useful in not only the Rock-themed Gym in Rustboro City, but against Norman when he returned to Petalburg.

So, when they went back to the Gym, our heroes were expecting an easy victory. Brendan even got to skip the warm-up trainers in this one, which he was pretty sure would not be an option in later challenges.

The Gym Leader wasn't very intimidating on her own, they discovered.

"I wasn't expecting challengers today," she said, looking up from her book in surprise. "You wouldn't happen to be Pokedex kids, would you?"

"What's it to you?"

The Gym Leader took Brendan's statement for a yes. "And which of you is the one after the Badge?" Brendan raised his hand. She put the book away and prepared to send out her first Pokémon. "Then it's time to put what I learned at the Trainer's School to good use. Geodude, go!"

"It's time to put my traning to use," Brendan said, before admitting to himself that it sounded much better in his head. Well, too late now. "Shroomish, do the thing!"

* * *

Roxanne's first Geodude didn't even put up a fight. Her second was slightly more impressive, but Shroomish took care of all damage with Absorb.

Her third Pokémon was not an Onix, as both Pokedex carriers expected, but a creature that was...

Well, it was certainly _something._

It was not particularly tall, not even Roxanne's height, but it was still _large._ Thick from side to side, and front to back even more so, due to the abnormally large nose sitting in the center of its face. There was no center, just two eyes above the nose and a chin that doubled as a body. Brendan couldn't take his eyes off of it.

May said it best, as if she were doing research for a story: "So how big are its boogers, on average?"

Of course, she had all the bluntness of a curious twelve-year-old, but because she actually was a curious twelve-year-old, Roxanne let it slide.

"Nosepass is a sturdy Pokémon," she said, and May looked away from the giant nose to focus on the young woman commanding it. Brendan wasn't quite that strong. "It's one of Hoenn's best Rock-types, and the mascot of the Rustboro City Gym."

"It's only the Gym mascot because you made it the Gym mascot," May said, almost exasperated. "That doesn't answer the question. I'm Professor Birch's daughter, and I've never been this close to a Nosepass before. Dad thought it would be wrong for me to study Nosepass snot."

"Don't say that out loud," Brendan complained. "I came here for a battle, not a discussion on Pokémon boogers."

"I was only helping her with her research," Roxanne protested, "but, yes, I did get a bit distracted. You wouldn't mind if we continued this conversation after the match, will you?"

"Don't bother." May looked over the Nosepass, and pulled out the green sparkle pencil and idea book. "I think I'll be able to guess."

If that was the creative process at work, Brendan was very happy that he wasn't a writer. "Shroomish, Absorb again!"

"Nosepass, use Rock Tomb!"

The Rock Tomb finally managed to take down Shroomish, the Absorb doing the minimum amount of super-effective damage. Brendan didn't even flinch as he called him back to his ball. After all, he had a Plan B. "Adam, do the thing!"

"Rock Tomb again!" Roxanne commanded, but Adam's Double Kick was faster. When the Nosepass fell, the amount of dust it kicked up completely obscured it from view.

* * *

"I'm instructed to give this to victorious trainers," Roxanne said, handing Brendan a small item she referred to as a Stone Badge. "With it, you'll be able to command some traded Pokémon, and it gives you the authority to use Cut outside of battle."

Brendan turned the Stone Badge over in his hands a few times before placing it into its slot in the Badge Case. "So where can we get Cut? More importantly, will we ever really need it?"

"I'm pretty sure someone has an HM in town." Roxanne drummed her fingers on the cover of her book, trying to find a way to put her thoughts into words. "I'm not sure where you'd need to use it that you can't take a longer way around, though. It's not necessary, I suppose."

Brendan looked at the Badge Case one more time, and then put it away in his bag. "Thanks for the battle, anyway. Hey, May, are you picking out a new Gym?"

"Give me a second," May answered at once, and then held out a map. "We could go through Rusturf Tunnel, where we'd end up in Verdanturf Town and can head over to Mauville City. It's right past Route 116..."

"Rusturf Tunnel is closed," Roxanne interrupted. "You could go through Petalburg Woods and back into the city -"

"Not likely," Brendan said, reaching over and swiping the map from May. "I promised the Petalburg Gym Leader that I'd only challenge him once I got four other Badges."

"And how did he expect that?" Roxanne leaned over Brendan's shoulder to look at the map herself. "Only Rustboro, Petalburg, Mauville and Lavaridge have Gyms here on mainland Hoenn, and you can't use Surf without the Balance Badge."

He'd forgotten that she didn't know that Norman was a father. Or at least that he was Brendan's father. He wondered if claiming family ties would get him all of the Badges, an easy pass to the Hall of Fame, and the ability to eventually claim the Hoenn region as his own.

Or not, world domination kind of sounded boring. Sure, the power sounded nice, but the paperwork would just be too much to handle.

"Do you think anyone has a boat we can borrow?" May suggested, and Brendan clipped Adam's ball back into place on his belt.

"Borrow, steal, it doesn't matter as long as it gets returned. Your dad's Professor Birch and mine's Norman, if we play the research card we can do whatever we want."

"I'm pretty sure laws still apply, Brendan," May started, but was caught off guard when her friend started to drag her off to the Pokémon Center, where they would heal Adam and Shroomish before starting on their way to Dewford Town, the small island that promised a Gym.

Of course, no sooner had they left the Gym than they heard a loud, surprisingly familiar voice crying for help.

"Stop that thief! He took the Devon Goods!"


	6. Return of the Pirate

**Benjamin of Team Aqua. Remember the name.**

They didn't want to get involved. They were only kids, after all, and they didn't think they could do anything useful with only the four Pokémon they had between them.

That wasn't really an option, though. They seemed to know that even before the man recognized them.

"You're the girl who saved the Devon Goods before!" he said, and May pretended to not understand. "Please, you have to help me! The Team Aqua thief took the Devon Goods, and I don't have Pokémon to stop him!"

"I'd love to help," May started, the 'but' obvious to anyone except this man.

"That's great!" he cut in, oblivious to the coming addition. "Now go after him!"

"But I can't." May gestured to Brendan. "His Pokémon need to be healed after his Gym battle, and we're in it together."

The man had apparently forgotten all about Brendan, and the boy would have preferred it if May hadn't pointed him out. "The Pokémon Center is right there," he said, and Brendan hurried along. "You'll still help, right?"

May watched her friend disappear into the building, then slowly turned back to the man. "That depends. Do you have a boat?"

* * *

There was no sign of a Team Aqua thief on Route 116, and since the last Team Aqua member they'd seen had been proudly wearing the pirate costume, they should have been easy to spot.

Instead, they got a few trainers who remembered them from when they were training Adam and Shroomish for the battle, several wild Pokémon attacks, and an old man sobbing at the entrance to what they assumed was Rusturf Tunnel.

"What happened to you?" The question fell from May's mouth before Brendan could process what she was doing. "Did some guy dressed as a pirate steal something from you, too?"

The old man stopped his crying long enough to swallow. "He took her," he said, so quietly that the kids barely heard him. "He took Peeko and now I don't know what he's done to her, and I have no other Pokémon to help me get her back."

"Don't do it, May," Brendan warned, but commanding a Magikarp to use Solarbeam would have gotten more of the desired effect.

"We were already forced into getting the stolen Devon Goods back to the proper place." She paid no attention to Brendan's exasperated facepalm, either. "I'm sure it's the same thief that took your...whatever she was."

"My Peeko."

"Right. Your...Peeko." She was sure that there was no Pokémon called Peeko, but she wasn't sure that she would get a decent answer if she asked what kind of Pokémon Peeko actually was. "Brendan, do you want to go first and be the hero?"

Well, it wasn't like he had anything better to do with his time. And May was right behind him, just in case.

Brendan touched the wall of the cave, contemplating what would have to happen before it collapsed with them, the thief, and Peeko inside. He couldn't think of anything in particular. "Before I forget, May, there's something I want to say to you."

"What's that?"

She didn't seem to know where he was going with this. That was a good thing. "I hate you and everything you stand for."

Something told him that she didn't take it seriously. "I'm here for my career, not for your approval."

Yeah, he liked her. She knew a sarcastic comment when she heard one.

* * *

It wasn't hard to find the Team Aqua thief once they got inside the cave. It wouldn't have been hard to find him even if he hadn't been in uniform, as he was the one being attacked by a Wingull and using words that even May was pretty sure didn't exist. They'd have to actually read a dictionary cover-to-cover to be positive, of course, but it didn't sound like any language they'd heard of.

They knew what he meant, of course, but he wasn't using the curse words they were familiar with.

"I'll give you a warning," Brendan said, distracting the pirate and his captive from their conflict. "You can either fork over the Goods and let the bird go, or May and I will get involved. And if May and I get involved, there's a good chance you'll be dragged to the middle of the ocean by a Mudkip with way too much time to kill."

May shot him a warning look, telling him to leave Jerry out of it, but kept her mouth shut. The pirate didn't seem to notice.

"You two are the kids from Petalburg Woods, aren't you?"

"You're that same guy?" It was nice for May to know that she could take him, at least. "Huh. I forgot all about you. What was your name again?"

"Daniel?" Brendan suggested.

"No, it was something...it started with a B..."

"Brad? Billy? Blar-Blar?"

"Yeah, I think it's one of those."

The pirate grabbed onto the Wingull and pointed its beak at the pair. "It's _Benjamin,_ you disrespectful brats! Benjamin of Team Aqua! And I'll crush you like insects for even thinking you can disrespect me like this!"

May didn't even flinch, just turned to Brendan. "Do you want to do this, or should I?"

"You did it last time. Let me handle this one."

May stepped aside, but noticeably kept her hand on one of the red and white balls attached to the strap of her bag. Benjamin sent out his Poochyena again, but Brendan had a Combusken with Double Kick.

It barely even qualified as a battle.

* * *

"...and that's what happened," May finished as they returned the Wingull, the missing Peeko, to her human. Her narration was impressive, cutting it down only to the important parts. Brendan had expected people of her career path to be hooked on the details.

The old man and the Devon employee thanked them once again, the old man even promising that he could take them to Dewford Town in his boat, which was all they really wanted. But as he went, the employee stopped the kids from following.

"I think you two should speak to the Devon President about this," he said, pushing them ahead, into a tall building. "You saved the Goods twice, and I think he'll want to thank you himself."

"He doesn't need to," Brendan said quickly. "I think you've thanked us for it already." He and May each had a Great Ball to prove it, too.

But the employee was insistent. "Just wait here," he told them, "and I'll come back after I explain everything to the President."

Brendan thought about ditching, but May refused, so they sat together in a few waiting chairs. And they waited. They waited for nearly five minutes before the Devon employee returned, said some stuff about how he'd told the President the story of, well, everything, and forced them into the office, where a gray-haired man in a suit was watching.

"So," the president said, giving the pair a quick study, "I hear that you two saved the Goods twice."

"Once each," May agreed. "Is there something wrong with that, sir?"

"Not wrong at all," the President said, getting up from his desk. "In fact, it's so right that I would like to entrust you and your boyfriend -"

"We're just friends," Brendan corrected. May shot him a warning look, but kept her own mouth tightly shut. She knew how things turned out in stories where characters denied a romance, and even though she admitted Brendan would be someone's definition of cute, she was positive she wouldn't want to date him for long.

The President walked over and handed Brendan a letter and the Goods. "This letter is to Steven Stone, my son. The last time I heard from him, he was in Dewford Town. I thought you might be stopping for the Badge and decided that it would be easier than mailing it myself. He might leave town before that."

"So you're trusting us to be messengers," May summarized.

"And are these for Steven, too?" Brendan asked, holding the package of Goods in one hand.

"No, those are for Captain Stern in Slateport. He's looking forward to those, so don't lose them."

"But why send us when you know where Captain Stern lives?"

"And waste money and time shipping it? No, just take it to his work station."

Before they could point out that the company was successful enough to mail it, the employee led them back to the exit, wished them luck and sent them on their way.

May stared at the door of the building for a little longer than necessary. "I don't know about you, but that sounded like the letter and the Goods were actually important."

"What's the letter going to say?" Brendan challenged. "'Hey, Steven, you know the kids I forced to deliver this to you? They're going to save the world. Good luck playing cryptic mentor! Signed, Dad.' Somehow, I don't think the President could see that happening."

"Yeah, you're right." May turned around and stretched out her back muscles. "Well, the boat is on the other side of Petalburg Woods. Ready to challenge the forest gods to a duel?"


	7. The Second Gym

**In which May wants to kill, and Brendan is not about to stop her.**

"Hey, kids! Can I see your Pokenav devices, please?"

They had barely even left the Devon building when the man approached them, but after handing him the requested items, he managed to give them some prototype software.

"Try not to use it too much," he added. "It'll scare people when the call feature gives off a bunch of static. But you can use it for contacting Mr. Stone in an emergency, and each other if you ever get separated."

"How do we do that?" May asked, and Brendan was forced to endure a tutorial not once but twice as the man registered each in the other's Pokenav.

"Can we go now?" he whined when he got his Pokenav back. "Mr. Stone gave us a mission, and we don't want to keep him waiting."

"Yes, there's that," the man agreed, and backed off. "Just remember, if you need to remember where to deliver those Goods, or if Steven isn't in Dewford anymore, just call Mr. Stone and ask for directions."

"We'll keep that in mind," Brendan promised, stepping behind May to give her a friendly shove in the direction of Petalburg Woods. "Don't worry about us, we'll come back eventually."

"I don't want to go back," May complained when she was positive they were out of earshot.

"I don't, either." Brendan let her go so he could enter the forest first. "That, my innocent friend, is what some people refer to as a _lie._ As a professional story teller, you might understand the concept yourself."

May started to object to that. The words came to her tongue and nearly fell off. But they died slowly, one by one, as she realized that, in the big picture, a lie or two wasn't really so bad, no matter what the children's programs she used to watch tried to drill into her head. Instead, she chose another question.

"You didn't get the name of the old guy with the Wingull, did you?"

* * *

Mr. Briney, as the sign on the boat said, had left his door unlocked for the kids who saved Peeko. Brendan didn't even bother to knock, and they found the old man chasing his Wingull around in circles.

"Mr. Briney?" May asked uncertainly, as Brendan stepped between the man and his bird only to get literally brushed aside.

"Hold on, lass," he snapped at the Pokémon, but Peeko didn't so much as slow down. The old man gave the kids an apologetic glance. "You may have to wait. Peeko took the keys to my boat and..." He was suddenly hit with recognition, and a second look at Brendan confirmed whatever was going through his head. "Oh, I see! You two are the children who saved her from the pirate!"

"Yes," Brendan said, grabbing Peeko as she made another round and pulling the key from her beak. "Yes, we are. And we want to call in that favor you owe us and make you drive us to Dewford Town."

Peeko screeched indignantly, and Brendan let her go. She went to perch on her human, glaring at Brendan over the length of her sharp beak. Mr. Briney didn't seem to care much, as long as she wasn't hurt.

"I see no harm in that," he decided. "Peeko, prepare for takeoff, or whatever it is that sailors say nowadays. We're setting sail for Dewford Town!"

* * *

"So," May said as she and Brendan climbed out of the boat, both a little dizzy from the ride, "are we going to the Gym first, or are we going to track down Steven?"

"The Gym will still be there tomorrow," was the immediate answer. "Steven might not even be here today."

"And where do we start looking for him?"

Brendan looked around at the small, sandy town, trying to think. "He can't be that hard to find," he decided. "We'll check the Pokémon Center first. If he's not there, we'll ask the nurse for directions."

"And how do we know which one's Steven?"

"He's the son of the Devon President." Brendan started forward, the letter in his hands. "Just look for a rich guy."

There was no sign of Steven in the Pokémon Center, but the nurse did say that he brought in his Metagross after it ran out of move power. "He said something about Dewford Cave," she told them, pointing it out on the map. "Are you going to the Gym to get the Badge? It's necessary if you're going to the lower levels of the cave."

"Maybe can take Jerry," May suggested. "Adam has Peck, anyway, it should only take a few minutes in a Fighting-type Gym."

Brendan didn't ask how she knew. "You're trusting me with your Pokémon?"

"Why not?" May laughed, leaning on the counter. "Trade bonus, remember? Maybe it will get him the experience he needs to evolve. It's coming up soon, you know."

Well, if the Badge and Jerry's evolution were this close, he didn't see an objection. "If Steven doesn't get the letter," Brendan decided, "then it'll just teach his dad a lesson, wouldn't it? Let's start the trade, we've got a big day ahead."

* * *

The Gym Leader of Dewford Town was good friends with Roxanne. Yes, they had a few differences, more than a few if they were being honest. But Roxanne was not above putting down a book for some fun, and, contrary to popular opinion, Brawly was capable of reading past the basic level necessary to become a Gym Leader in the first place.

So, he had actually been warned ahead of time that Brendan and May existed, and had set out what he had thought was the perfect maze.

Perhaps he should have consulted with her before he put his plan into action.

"What happened to you guys?" he asked, noticing that both his challenger and the challenger's friend looked scuffed up, May with an already-yellow bruise just under her right knee. "Don't you know that Pokémon are there to protect you from fights?"

May made a sound that was halfway between a wolf-like growl and a shriek of anger. "Your stupid maze of gym equipment did this to us," she hissed. "A split-second of light and then leaving us to find a path ourselves? If I was athletic at all, I'd break every part of your face."

"I might do it," Brendan agreed, rubbing the spot on his arm where he'd fallen onto a treadmill after tripping on a dumbbell. "But first, I'm going to destroy your team and steal the Badge."

"I gave you guys the option to go back out there," he reminded them. "Go back out and trigger the light again until you memorized it."

May spun on Brendan, after taking a moment to remember that her Mudkip, her strongest Pokémon, was currently with him and could not direct a Mud Slap onto this man. "Kick his butt, Brendan."

Brendan didn't need to be told twice. He hadn't even needed to be told once. By the time she'd started talking, his hand was already on a ball, and by the time she'd finished, he'd already thrown it.

"Adam, do the thing!"


	8. Enter Steven, Hot Guy in a Suit

**I had nothing to do with this chapter title. Nothing at all. The editor expresses her deep regrets, and would like to explain that she was sleep-deprived and thought it was funny, which it probably was at one in the morning. The** **title does not reflect our opinion but (apparently) the majority of Hoenn's.**

 **And someone asked if we could start writing down what Pokémon our protagonists have, but we thought it would be pretty easy to follow, as our personal rules are "No more than eight Pokémon per character, catching 'em all became impossible years ago" and "No more than two with nicknames, including the starter." To compromise, whenever one of them captures or evolves a new Pokémon, we'll write the list at the bottom to help keep it straight. This will carry on into future stories.**

Brawly used three Pokémon for his Gym battles, the same as Roxanne. Brendan was not used to dealing with Fighting-types, and at first he was a little worried about what might happen in this match.

But, of course, his worry meant nothing.

Adam had Peck, which made the Machop a little too easy. Meditite was a little harder, being part Psychic, but the Combusken was channeling his trainer's rage and managed to Peck it down, too. It was only as a favor to May, and a worry about Adam's remaining health, that Brendan used Jerry against the Makuhita while Adam watched from the sidelines.

"Bulk Up, Makuhita," Brawly ordered, like he had done once already. Brendan knew he was just trying to overpower anything that was thrown his way, but the small Mudkip was getting in plenty of damage.

"Water Gun!"

Jerry's attack hit the opponent right in the face, and Makuhita stumbled back. Fists whirling, it took aim for its opponent, sending Jerry into something similar to panic.

The Arm Thrust only hit twice, thankfully. It was still enough to get Brendan worried. "Do you want to let Adam finish this?" he asked, but Jerry shook his head.

 **"You'll waste a turn switching me out,"** he answered out loud. **"I think I've almost got him anyway. Just call the attack."**

Brendan didn't waste time after that. "One more Water Gun, then!"

The Makuhita tried to fight it off with another Arm Thrust this time, but just ended up getting knocked back. Falling to the ground, it could barely move its fist in surrender.

May couldn't stop the relieved laughter as she ran up to hug her starter. "You did it," she cooed, as if congratulating a baby for eating its first jar of mashed vegetables. "You're such a good boy!"

Jerry's noise of mild amusement quickly switched to a triumphant cry as he finally started evolving. When the light cleared and the Marshtomp took the time to get used to walking on two legs, Brawly handed Brendan the Knuckle Badge.

"Take this not just as a symbol of your victory, but as an apology for what I put you through on your way over." Brawly at least looked ashamed of himself, which was a start. "My next challenger will have an easier time, I promise."

And then Adam tripped the Gym Leader as he went back to turn on the lights for the trainers, just so Brawly could feel what Brendan and May had felt.

* * *

"That could have gone better," May commented as they wandered into the cave. "You really didn't have to make the bet about Flash, you know."

"We can find Steven without it," Brendan insisted, squinting into the darkness. There were a few lights around the cave, but it was filled with Sableye and Aron, both Pokémon that didn't react well to light as newly hatched babies. "Besides, if that guy checks all our Pokémon's moves and finds that none of them have Flash, he'll give me money. I like having money."

May glared into the darkness ahead. "I noticed you never said anything about me getting a cut."

"You're going to publish whatever you write about this adventure, May. You'll be getting royalties, or whatever they call it. Even if it isn't much, it'll be more than I'll be winning."

May rolled her eyes but kept pushing forward, her eyes peeled for any new Pokémon. She'd always wanted a Mawile, and she'd heard of them living in this cave. Maybe if she caught one, she'd get to focus on -

A thud distracted her from her thoughts, and she turned around, barely able to see the white of her friend's hat as he struggled to pick himself off the ground. A sarcastic remark flew to the tip of her tongue, but she swallowed it immediately once she got a look at what he'd tripped over.

It wasn't a Mawile, but it was a Steel-type. The Aron was more identifiable by the indignant cry than any sort of shape, but May pulled her Pokedex from her pocket to shine a light, pun not intended, on the situation.

It wasn't angry enough to attack, but it was watching Brendan as if saying, **"Stupid human should watch where he's going."** Brendan, on the other hand, was not willing to just sit there and let the Aron win.

"I challenge you to a duel!" he declared, pointing dramatically at the small Pokémon in front of him. The Aron looked confused, but Brendan cleared it up quickly. "Shroomish, do the thing!"

* * *

The Great Ball clicked closed around the Aron, and this time, it stayed inside. Brendan had wasted three regular balls on it, but he was determined to catch it, and the Aron had apparently given up the fight.

When he was satisfied that he'd captured it, he gave it a quick scan with his Pokedex. "Huh. This one's a girl. I had plans to get an Aggron and demolish my opponents, but she might not be into that."

"Why wouldn't she?" May asked, more out of habit than anything else. "Girls love senseless destruction, it's in our nature. We just hide it behind pink frills and pretty faces."

Brendan looked down at the ball in his hands, unsure of what to say to that. "There's nothing pink or frilly about you," he commented. "But I can't argue with the senseless destruction bit. You seemed pretty cool with smashing Brawly's face in."

"Nothing pink or frilly? You didn't see my bedroom before the makeover started." May held out her Pokedex as a replacement flashlight, the light glinting off the eyes of a Sableye. It hissed, baring its unnaturally sharp teeth at them, but it scurried off in the opposite direction. "We're finding Steven, remember?"

Brendan clipped Aron's ball to its place on his belt before starting off once again, using his own Pokedex. "So where do we look for a rich guy?"

"I don't know. He'd probably be wearing something like a designer hard hat, I guess."

"Are they a thing?"

May laughed, the sound echoing in the dark chamber. "No idea," she said happily. "We'll just stick to the trial-and-error method!"

"Sounds like a plan," Brendan agreed, all the while hoping she had something resembling a clue as to what she was doing.

* * *

They found light, real light, only half an hour into their exploration. And with the lights came the chamber of carvings, carvings of ancient Pokémon that May recognized as Groudon and Kyogre, two of ancient Hoenn's most famous deities, the ones said to have shaped the region, land and water, with the aftermath of their battle.

And with the chamber of carvings came the man that was examining them. The man was wearing a nice suit even in the dirty cave, a suit so nice that he had to be Steven. Brendan noticed May's mouth pop open, and he could tell why. He didn't care about good-looking men, but he was able to recognize the trait when he saw it.

"So the primal forms really exist," the man said, not seeming to notice the kids standing right behind him. "To think that so much power could be held in just two Pokémon...and so different from Mega Evolution, yet somehow the same..."

"Are you Steven Stone?" Brendan asked, distracting the man from his monologue.

"I am," Steven answered at once, not particularly surprised. Maybe he had noticed them, after all. "Why are you asking?"

"Your dad gave us this to hand over," Brendan said quickly, digging through his bag to hand over the crumpled letter. "We didn't read it. I wanted to, but Princess Drool over here told me it was a felony, and I didn't want to have trouble with the law so soon after moving here."

May couldn't speak, even though her brain objected to being addressed as 'Princess Drool.' She'd never been this close to an actual _pretty_ man before. Not when he was talking to her. She kind of liked it.

Brendan, being resistant to pretty-boy charm, just attempted to read over Steven's shoulder. Which, given their relative heights, was not an easy thing to accomplish, and the President's writing made it even more difficult. He got about three words in before Steven noticed.

"This couldn't have been easy," Steven finally said, folding up the letter and carefully putting it in his pocket. "I suppose I should repay you in some way. Perhaps a battle? Not now, of course, but when you're stronger. I promise that I give out more prize money than you're probably used to seeing."

"Or you could just save us the trouble of finding you again and just hand over the prize money right now," Brendan suggested.

"No," Steven said at once, his tone implying a secret joke that they were too young and inexperienced to be let in on yet. "I have a feeling I'll be seeing you both a great deal. You're Pokedex carriers, am I right? They tend to collect badges, and I'm personally friends with three different Gym Leaders. We're likely to pay a visit to at least one at the same time."

"Maybe I'll let you read some of my work sometime," May offered, and Steven tried to fake interest.

"In the future," he promised, figuring he could at least skim it. "What were your names again?"

"Brendan and May."

"Brendan and May. I'll be sure to remember you."

And that was how the pair agreed that Steven was one of Hoenn's more normal citizens. The thought was not very comforting.

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Combusken (male, named Adam) Shroomish (male) Aron (female)_

 _May: Marshtomp (male, named Jerry, evolved from Mudkip at the start of the chapter) Surskit (female)_


	9. Aquarium Attack

**In which (Alpha Sapphire-inspired) Archie learns what he's up against.**

Mr. Briney was waiting for them, and didn't ask any questions about why they were asking to be dropped off at Slateport immediately. He must have known that the Devon Goods were important pieces of equipment.

"Just a minute, you two. We have to wait for Peeko."

"I think she'd know you aren't abandoning her," Brendan complained, getting an annoyed glance from May.

"It's his boat," she said, crossing her legs to use as a table for her notebook. She was about halfway through the pages now, she'd probably need a new idea journal soon. "He can wait for his Wingull for as long as he wants."

Brendan leaned back against the wall of the boat, trying to control his impatience. When Peeko landed inside the boat three minutes later, he made a face at her.

Mr. Briney didn't even turn around, but he knew what was going on, anyway. "Leave my Peeko alone, Brendan," he warned, "or you'll be _swimming_ to Slateport."

Brendan's tongue retreated back into his mouth so quickly it made a sound. May tried to pretend she wasn't an eye witness, but he saw the smile she tried to hide with her hair.

* * *

Neither of them had planned a beach party, they agreed on that much.

Slateport City didn't have a dock, exactly, and what they did have was not for public use yet. So, instead, the old man dropped them off at a beach just outside of Slateport City and gave May his number, just because he was going back home and wasn't sure if they would need him for anything else.

"I know the boy's the one who saved my Peeko," he said, "but to be blunt with you, lass...I don't trust him."

May looked over at Brendan, who was facing away from them and clearly attempting to guess what the Goods were for. "Not many people do," she agreed. "But he's my journey partner, so I have no choice."

"Did we even get directions to Captain Stern?" Brendan asked, and took May's silence and Mr. Briney's departure as an answer. "Then we'll start battling every sailor on this beach. One of them has to know where the captain is, right?"

"You really think they'd even know him?"

"It couldn't be too hard. It's a bunch of people who really like boats in the same area, they have to have at least met, right?"

There wasn't anything May could really do, except follow him along as he tried to battle sailors into giving up the whereabouts of the man in question, and take on a few herself.

It was quickly discovered that Aron didn't like the beach, either. When she threw a tantrum and started kicking up sand, they figured it was time to get a move on, and hope that the actual Slateport City was good enough.

But, as they approached the museum dedicated to water (which, frankly, Brendan thought Hoenn had far too much of) they saw something that made them both groan in defeat.

There was a long line of people waiting to get in, and every last one of them was dressed like a pirate.

"Do you think that Captain Stern's in there?" May suggested weakly, and Brendan shrugged.

"Probably," he said, as if he wasn't bothered by the sight of land pirates anymore. "But we'll check the shipyard, first. I saw a sign on our way over."

The line started moving forward, but Brendan and May were already moving backward.

* * *

After one quick trip to the shipyard and a short conversation with Captain Stern's suspiciously-named friend Dock, they were sent along to the museum, just as they'd expected. The pirate line was gone, but they found far too many scattered around the inside of the museum. The top floor, on the other hand, was completely emptied of people, except for a single man.

"Are you Captain Stern?" Brendan asked, and at the man's confirmation, he held out the box containing the Goods. "The Devon president told us to give these to you."

"Why didn't he mail them?" Stern asked.

"That's what I said," Brendan said, dropping the box onto the table next to them. "But President Scrooge thought that sending twelve-year-old kids to deliver a very important package would be the better idea, because it was cheaper."

"I personally think he just wanted us out of his town," May added. "Chaos tends to follow Brendan everywhere, I've noticed."

"Wait, chaos follows _me?_ " Brendan seemed offended at the suggestion, which caught May off guard. "None of this weird pirate garbage happened until I met _you_ , the daughter of a man who ran from a Zigzagoon!"

"Yeah, well, you're a shoplifter." May stuck out her tongue, as though she'd won the argument.

 _"One_ bottle of soda, and I didn't get out the door with it! Leave it alone!"

"All right, fork over the Goods!"

They'd been hoping that they would be able to escape before the pirates caught up with them, but they weren't entirely surprised.

"Our boss wants those parts," one of the two pirates said. "Just hand them over, and nobody gets hurt."

"Wait a minute," said the other pirate, seeming to vaguely recognize Brendan and May. "Don't these kids fit the description Benjamin gave us?"

"Who?" The first pirate thought, then seemed to remember. "Oh, right. They're the ones that kicked his butt to the curb, aren't they?"

"On different occasions," Brendan added helpfully.

The pirates weren't amused. "So we'll take 'em on," the first one decided. "They took down a new recruit, but how good is their double-battle training?"

To be honest, Brendan and May had never had a double battle together. But, as they say, there's a first time for everything.

And the first time for this couldn't have come at a better moment.

* * *

"We can still win this!" the first pirate insisted, searching himself for another ball. "I've got one on me somewhere..."

"It's no use," the second pirate said, hanging his head in shame. "They won, fair and square. Man, the boss won't be happy when he hears about this..."

"Hears about what, exactly?"

The pirates both gulped. Captain Stern hid behind the kids. The kids themselves were more intrigued than scared.

The man entering the room seemed less like a pirate and more like a merman that had climbed out of the water to grow legs. A merman who had taken a scruffy pirate look instead of the long-haired and shirtless mermen that May had grown accustomed to seeing, but 'pirate' was still only the second thought to cross their minds.

The pirate merman watched as the Team Aqua grunts talked over each other, each pointing at a different child in their attempts to shift the blame. For his part, the man who could only be Team Aqua's boss just stood there and tried to process what they were saying.

Then, after the talking had quieted, the boss gestured to Brendan and May in disbelief. "Them?" The grunts nodded. "These are children."

"They're evil children," one pirate tried to insist. "They can't be normal, they protected the Devon Goods three times!"

"I'm shivering in me timbers," the boss said, dripping sarcasm like a faucet, as the pair of grunts fell into silence once again. "They can't be older than fourteen, if they're lucky. I'm going to speak to Matt and Shelly about our screening process."

"But we'll keep our jobs, right?"

"That is up for debate." The boss looked over at Brendan and May again, and said something that only he and the grunts could hear. Then, slowly, he approached the children, as if trying to demonstrate that he wasn't a threat.

"The Devon Goods belong here," he said, as if that would convince them that his team wasn't bunch of thieves. "We of Team Aqua love the sea, and we're doing what we can to protect it. Some days we make horrible decisions, but it's all for the good of the world."

"Horrible decisions?" Brendan asked, uncertain.

The boss brushed it off. "It's best not to question them. You're too young to understand." He turned around, back to the grunts. "Let's leave them here, you two are obviously not strong enough to deal with kids."

"And what if the kids work for Team Magma?" one grunt asked, and the boss laughed.

"Those toddlers beat you, didn't they? Maxie could only dream of having people like that working for him. They're outside observers of our feud, mark my words."

And they were gone, leaving the two wondering what Team Aqua's plan to protect the sea was, and how stupid they really were in order to think it was going to work.


	10. Contest Crush

**Lisia is every performer's dream, but a nightmare for those with stage fright.**

They said goodbye to the captain, leaving the Goods with him, and left for the Pokémon Center in silence.

"Did you get any new ideas yet?" Brendan asked, ending the moment, as May put her Marshtomp's ball on the counter for the nurse to take with Brendan's Combusken.

"Not really," was the short answer. "Team Aqua doesn't seem like a competent organization to me. Besides, what kind of crime is loving water?"

"They still attempted to steal things."

"So did you, once. And they weren't particularly competent at theft, either. They got squashed by twelve-year-olds just starting their journey." Once Jerry and Adam were handed back to their trainers, she started on her way, only to find people leaving the building in a large group.

"...and Lisia's back in Slateport for the first time since her uncle dropped off the radar," one boy was saying, getting May's attention. "I'm not sure if she's going to enter the Master Rank contest yet, but if she is, I'd love to see her and Chaz go after each other again."

"Chaz hasn't even made it to the Master Rank yet," a girl pointed out. "And Lisia doesn't do rivalries, she said so in a magazine interview."

Another girl waved that away. "Yeah, but once he stops trying to put a Machoke in Cuteness contests, he'll be in the Top 5 Coordinators list for sure."

Brendan glanced at his companion, hoping for answers. "Lisia?" he mouthed, uncertain.

"A contest star," May whispered back. "I forgot, Johto doesn't do those."

"Yeah, we're pretty action-oriented back there." Brendan watched as more people swarmed for the exit, all of them getting excited. The group that had announced Lisia's presence, not wanting to miss their chance at meeting their idol, started pushing for the door, too. "Well, where are we going next? Mauville City, right?"

* * *

They couldn't even get out of Slateport. It wasn't that they didn't try, but the crowd to meet Lisia was too big to escape. So, when somebody decided to drag them into it, they had no choice but to get involved.

"Good afternoon, everybody!" a female voice cheered, and the entire crowd roared with excitement. Brendan peeked through the crowd to see a girl only a little older than he was, dressed like she crawled out of a magical girl anime.

This was Lisia? He'd expected a grown woman from how the crowd had talked about her. A grown woman with a lot of experience, and more Pokémon than just one Altaria.

"I'm not here to perform," Lisia continued when the enthusiasm died. "Instead, it's time for Lisia's Miraculous Contest Scouting!"

More cheers went up, and Brendan looked over at May for answers. She held up a hand, silently telling him that the answers would come.

And they did, only a few moments later, when Lisia began wandering through the crowd. Every now and then she would stop in front of a fan, look them over, and then decide that they didn't have whatever she was looking for. Then, passing one of the girls that had come to the Pokémon Center, she stopped in front of Brendan.

There was something uncomfortable in her stare, as if she was trying to find the right words for the situation. She turned to May, and the look vanished, to be replaced by something resembling determination.

"You two look like you have no idea what you're doing here," she said with a bright, dazzling smile. Brendan suddenly realized exactly why she was so popular. "That makes you two _perfect_ for Scouting. You'll do great in Pokémon Contests."

"What's a Pokémon Contest?" Brendan asked, faking complete ignorance on the topic. Maybe then this pretty girl would want to 'clear things up' for him.

There was no luck in that move. Lisia's smile turned wicked. "That," she whispered, leaning in close, "is _exactly_ what I wanted to hear." She spun around, taking both heroes with her, and rushed back to the front of the crowd, towing them along. "I've decided! This is something I have never done before - I have scouted _two_ trainers for Contest participation! Why don't you two introduce yourselves?"

Brendan decided he might as well, since he was stuck. "I'm Brendan, from Johto. I just moved to Hoenn the day I started my journey." The crowd whispered with hushed theories. "I'm...only vaguely aware of what a Contest actually is. I'd like to decline Lisia's offer, though I'm sure she means well."

Lisia was taken by surprise at this development. She clearly wasn't used to being turned down.

May, on the other hand, was more in line with what Lisia had been thinking. "I'm May. I've lived in Hoenn my whole life, and am very aware of what a Contest is, though I've never followed them that closely. I'd like to take the chance to participate."

Lisia turned smug. "Come with me, May. You and I look like we could be about the same clothes size. I've got a personal costumer making me a new outfit, but pink really isn't my color..."

* * *

"You look _gorgeous!"_ Lisia squealed as May stepped out of the changing room, dressed in a cotton-candy pink costume very similar to Lisia's. The second magical girl on the squad.

"She looks like a fairy princess," Brendan commented, though the girls weren't sure if he meant that as a compliment or not. "What happened to my friend?"

"She's ready for the stage, that's what happened." Lisia hadn't taken her eyes off of May, the pride of a mentor already in her eyes. "Which Pokémon are you going to use?"

"Surskit," May answered at once. "She's got Fell Stinger and Quick Attack...that's good enough for our first Cool contest, right?"

"Of course," Lisia agreed. "Could you let her out so my Ali can meet her? He's been dying to make some new friends."

Well, introducing the tiny water spider to the comparatively huge Altaria was a bit of a disaster, but May brought out Jerry to be the mediator. Even Brendan released Adam, Shroomish and Aron to play, and the six Pokémon instantly started a discussion of whatever Pokémon think about. Ali even gave them all contest tips.

"The Marshtomp and Combusken came from Professor Birch, didn't they?" Lisia asked, watching as Ali let Surskit climb on his back before flying her around the room. When Brendan confirmed it, she pulled at her fluffy wing-sleeves, a nervous habit. "They're obviously well cared for. Not to say the others aren't, but there's just some kind of aura around a lab Pokémon that can't be duplicated."

"Dad does make sure each Pokémon is properly trained before sending them out into the world." May smiled and waved at her Surskit, who lifted a single leg in response.

"Professor Birch is your father?" Lisia focused more on Jerry now, who was watching carefully in case Ali attempted sabotage. "And yet you choose to do contests. I forgot that not everybody follows in the footsteps of famous relatives."

Brendan suddenly remembered hearing about an uncle that disappeared from the spotlight only recently. "So, you decided to be like your uncle, right?"

"In part," Lisia answered cryptically. "His talent pool is a bit wider than mine. As good as he is at Contests, he's even more impressive in battle."

"Have you ever tried a regular battle?" Brendan asked curiously. "Ali evolved, so you must have had practice..."

Lisia shook her head. "Ali was a gift from my parents. I got him as a Swablu, but even when my uncle went easy on us, we hardly ever won." She looked up at the clock and jumped to her feet. "May! Surskit! It's almost time for your big performance! Get ready, we're on to the first exciting episode of your series - 'The Big Beginning! Heart-Pounding Contest Debut!' That, um..." she pulled at her sleeves again, "that's what I call it, anyway."

She even titled her apprentices' performances like an anime episode. Just how much TV did she watch in her free time?

* * *

"...Entry #4! May and Surskit!"

May felt a little uncomfortable as the spotlight settled on them. She was the only competitor who hadn't named her performing Pokémon, and she was wondering if she should have gone with Jerry instead. She wasn't sure what category his moveset would have fit, though. Besides, 'Jerry' was a human name he'd liked, there was no connection between that and Marshtomp or even Mudkip.

Well, too late to think about that.

"May is one of the newcomers scouted by Lisia herself," the announcer went on, "and it says that Surskit is the first Pokémon she ever caught. These two have been working together in battle for some time, but can they transfer that bond to the stage?"

The crowd went wild for the fourth time. Brendan, seated next to Lisia in the front row, noticed the star leaning back in her seat. "Is she winning?"

Lisia shrugged. "This is just the popularity round," she explained. "And the proper question is, are _they_ winning. Surskit is even more important than May in the long run, but they're a team. My answer to that question is, yes, so far, they are."

"But that can change?"

"Easily," was the instant reply. "I remember Chaz - another Contest star, you'll meet him eventually - coming in first in the popularity round but third overall. He's good at what he does, but his brain works in a way that's beyond human comprehension."

Brendan smothered a laugh. "I know people like that," he admitted. "Ask May what it was that I saved her dad from. I'll give you a hint - it was my Torchic's first battle."

Lisia's look of confusion, dimly illuminated by the bright lights of the Contest stage as the move round began, just made his day.

* * *

One Contest later, as May accepted her first Coolness ribbon, Brendan and Lisia retreated to the dressing room. When May arrived with her Surskit sliding behind her, the two immediately jumped her with congratulations.

"I told you, you can do this," Lisia said happily, looking like she wanted to give May a friendly hug but wasn't sure how that would be received. "I'm never wrong about these things."

"As she's been saying since we left the hall," Brendan added, ignoring the annoyed glance from the celebrity. "I'll bet that got your creative juices going."

"It certainly got mine," Lisia's costumer added from the corner. "I already have outfits planned out for Lisia's next demonstration...though I don't know why I bother, she insists on keeping her look the same for every competition."

"I told you, Laura, this one makes me feel closer to Ali."

Laura rolled her eyes theatrically. "Come on, Lisia. After your uncle -"

"My uncle told you to work with me because he's too nice to _fire_ you," Lisia corrected. "Besides, you made me this and I love it. Why don't you just show May her prize and get it over with?"

Laura laughed, getting the teen to smile back, showing that their friendship was still going. "As you wish, Your Highness."

She pulled back the dressing room curtain to show a Pikachu, dressed in a replica of May's costume, heart-tipped tail swishing. The Pikachu took a good look around the room and cheered when she saw May, doing a little twirl herself.

"She was inspired by you," Laura said, as May struggled to keep from making a noise at the cuteness of it all. "Lisia got her interested in Contests, but she insisted on a copy of _your_ costume. Luckily, she's been asking for it for weeks, only now wanting to wear it."

"That's adorable." May got down on her knees and tapped the Pikachu on the nose. "You really like playing dress-up, don't you?"

Pikachu squeaked her agreement. Lisia laughed.

"Why don't you take Pikachu along for the ride?" she suggested. "There's secondhand shops all over Hoenn, I'm sure somebody's donated a frilly dress that their daughter outgrew. Besides, she and Surskit can be Contest buddies!"

May looked down at Pikachu again. "I can't promise we'll be in Contests," she told her seriously. "I'm Brendan's sidekick and a writer above all else. I'd only use Contest fame to get the recognition necessary to get published. But shopping and sightseeing? I'm all for that kind of stuff."

Pikachu looked back at Lisia, then at Laura. Then, with a hum of indifference, she jumped into an empty ball in May's bag.

It was the easiest capture Brendan had ever witnessed. May, apparently used to these kinds of things, just put the ball with those holding Jerry and Surskit. "Thank you both for the Pikachu, and the great opportunity," she said, looking from Laura to Lisia. "I can't promise I'll use this power for good instead of evil, but I'll try."

"I'm more of a 'whichever gets me out of here faster' type, myself," Lisia said, reaching for an unopened water bottle. "I want all of you to try your best, ok?" She turned another bright smile on Brendan, letting him know that he and his Pokémon were included despite not choosing to go into Contests.

Brendan promised before he even knew what was happening. This girl must have been a witch.

* * *

 **Pokémon Teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (male Combusken) Shroomish (male) Aron (female)_

 _May: Jerry (male Marshtomp) Surskit (female) Cosplay Pikachu (female)_


	11. Wally's Return

**EDITOR'S NOTE: "I miss the old Mauville. Not the Game Corner, I was never good at that, I just miss how small it was compared to the remakes."**

On their way out of Slateport City, Brendan and May passed by the gate to the Cycling Road. When told that it was too dangerous for them to cross without a bicycle, Brendan came up with Plan B.

"Aron," he said as he released her from the ball, "I want you to do something morally wrong and probably illegal. I want you to go up to Cycling Road, and eat every piece of it. Leave the cyclists and their bikes alone, but eat the road."

Aron shook her head slowly, making it very clear what she thought of her trainer's plan. **"How did you ever earn two badges? Did you beat up the Gym Leaders in a dark alley?"**

"That isn't necessary," May said, almost as if in translation. "Let's say you could actually talk Aron into eating Cycling Road. Hypothetically. Assuming it's all metal, and not concrete suspended on metal pillars, we would have to wait for her to finish, which could take a while since she just ate an entire bowl of her special supply of Pokémon food. After that, we'd have to run, not only from the police but from everybody with an intact bicycle, assuming they all survived the fall. We'd have to run _fast._ "

"We can run fast."

"Not as fast as a bike, and definitely not as fast as a car." May gestured at the road above their heads. "And, assuming we make it to Mauville City in one piece, what's to stop the cops from getting us there? Goodbye Contest fame, goodbye honorary Championship. Forever scarred by our criminal record, we won't be able to find work. We'll mooch off of our fathers' successes until we're forty and they throw us out. Then we'll become hobos and live off of battling random trainers on the side of the road."

Brendan, somehow managing to keep a straight face through the entire thing, put a hand on her shoulder. "You are completely out of your mind," he stated. "Do you always think up worst-case scenarios?"

May pulled away. "Do you know how many characters the average writer has to kill off? ALL of Dad's favorite characters die, hero and villain alike, in just about every series he picks up in his free time. I need the practice."

"You don't need to kill anyone off. None of the good guys." He paused, suddenly realizing how boring that would be in a story any less light-hearted than a children's video game. "Well, I shouldn't say _none._ Maybe an old master and the hero's parents, but the main cast should only be framed for murder or something."

"You don't know how things work, do you?" Fortunately, she let it drop. "Now come on. In all this time we've wasted with talking, we could have been halfway to Mauville by now."

* * *

Mauville City was bigger than either of them had imagined. Brendan had taken a trip or two to Goldenrod City back in Johto, but this was much bigger than he'd expected.

Of course, Norman had been driving instead of making the family walk, so maybe he wasn't making the best comparison.

Either way, Mauville was huge. That went without question. May was glad that Brendan had refused her offer for a battle on the way up, because she wasn't sure that they'd find a Pokémon Center in time.

"The map doesn't have mini city maps," she said, angrily shoving her Pokenav back onto her bag strap belt. "We're going to have to find one. They're probably in the Pokémon Center."

"And we'd need a map to find the Pokémon Center," Brendan reminded her. "We'll just wing it. It shouldn't be too hard, they color-code their roofs for a reason."

He was right. It didn't take the pair long to find someone to point them in the direction of a Pokémon Center. Unfortunately, that person was insisting on a battle - a battle Brendan really didn't want to take part in.

"Wally, no offense, but I would crush you." The boy had, what, one Ralts? Aron could probably take it down, and she hadn't been used in a trainer battle before.

"We don't know that," Wally protested. "Please, Brendan? I just want to show my uncle that I can do it. If I don't, he'll never let me take the Gym challenge!"

Well, when he put it that way...

"No."

Wally didn't even flinch, just turned to look at May hopefully. "What about you? Will you battle with me?"

"I don't know," May answered, stepping back. "I've got a new Pokémon, but my Pikachu is more into Contests than regular battles. Brendan's Aron, on the other hand, needs to get used to being in battle."

She was right about Pikachu, at least. Brendan reluctantly decided that accepting the challenge would be for the best. "Fine, I'll battle you. And when you lose, I get full gloating rights."

"You mean _if_ I lose," Wally corrected.

Brendan shook his head. "No, I mean when." He selected his choice Pokémon before Wally could process what he'd said. "Aron, do the thing!"

* * *

"I told you so."

Aron had claimed victory in a very short time, so fast that the Ralts hadn't seen it coming. And, true to his word, Brendan had immediately claimed gloating rights.

Wally wasn't listening. "I made a mistake," he said, his voice almost pathetic. "I'm sorry, Ralts. I won't make mistakes like that again."

"Don't get upset over it," said a man, a man that had to be Wally's uncle. "Everyone loses at some point in their lives. Besides, that battle showed me that you and Ralts are serious about this whole Badge thing."

Wally's mood did a complete flip. "Does this mean I can go on a journey now?" he asked excitedly, nearly bouncing.

"Well, you're going to have to tell your aunt goodbye," his uncle said, holding the boy still with what would pass for an affectionate gesture. "And your cousin, and then call your parents and tell them all about this decision. I don't want them to think I'm throwing you out so soon after taking you in."

"But first we'll heal Ralts at the Pokémon Center," Wally finished. He looked back at Brendan and May. "Did you hear that? We're rivals now!"

"Don't get too into it," May warned. "Rivalries aren't something you just declare. I never called myself Brendan's rival."

"That's because you're his traveling companion," Wally pointed out. "You know all the Pokémon he has, and all of the moves that his Pokémon know. I didn't know he had an Aron until we battled, so I can call myself a rival all I want."

"Even though we're rivals, can you show us where the Pokémon Center is?" Brendan reached down to pet his Aron's head. "She might be necessary in my next Gym battle."

"Wattson does use Electric-types," Wally said, looking down at the small Steel-type as though he was committing her to memory. It wouldn't have been a bad idea, Aggron were huge, powerful, and known for destroying small towns when they got hungry. "She's not Ground-type, but all that means is she won't get an immunity. And May, if your Mudkip evolved, maybe you can let Brendan use him, too."

"In an Electric Gym?" May had said it before she thought, and as a result she nearly slapped her forehead. "I thought that the line didn't get the Ground type until Swampert. Sorry."

Brendan faked disappointment. "Oh, May," he sighed. "How can you ever hope to follow in your father's footsteps if you don't know what stage the Mudkip line gets the Ground type?"

She retaliated with a hard but playful shove that knocked him into Wally.

* * *

"Are we going to take a trip to Verdanturf Town first?" May asked as the three all healed their Pokémon, gathered around a small table while waiting for the call. "It's got a contest hall, and I do want to give Pikachu at least one chance to be on the stage."

"Maybe after," Brendan decided. "I heard it's doing the normal rank today, you already have a ribbon. We'll sign you up for the Cool contest again, maybe Lisia will pay attention to that."

"Any plans besides the Gym, then?"

"Is the Game Corner still functioning?" May shook her head. "Oh. Never mind, then. I thought I could win myself a rare Pokémon for a second."

"They didn't give out Pokémon as prizes like they do in Kanto and Johto," Wally corrected. "They gave out dolls in the shape of the Pokémon that Professor Birch gives to new trainers. It's not the same thing."

"Dolls? Why would people want dolls?"

"Secret Bases," May said, waving a hand as if it didn't matter. "They say they're the coolest thing ever, but they're really just glorified clubhouses. Easier to decorate without your parents hanging over your shoulder than the average bedroom, but adults pay visits, anyway."

"Do you have a Secret Base somewhere?" Brendan asked, and May immediately denied it.

"And if I ever get one," she told him, "I wouldn't tell you where it was. I'd let you search for hours, months even. Half the fun is apparently finding your friends' Bases."

"And challenging them to battles inside the Base," Wally finished. "And making new friends with people who own the Bases you broke into as you searched."

Brendan didn't, couldn't, form words around the concept. He wasn't an interior decorator, and doing this would take time out from getting the honorary Championship needed to shut people up about following in his father's footsteps. On the other hand, having his own personal battlefield sounded pretty cool.

His thoughts were interrupted by the alert that all of the Pokémon were healed, and when he and May picked up their teams, he felt it was best if he changed the topic. "Well, Shroomish, it's time to go back to May. I need as many Ground-type attacks as I can get for this next Gym, and Adam might be necessary in case of a Magnemite."

Neither of our heroes noticed Wally and his uncle slip out the door when their backs were turned.


	12. The Electric Man

**Wattson was more difficult than he should have been. I think we got him right, but it's hard to say.**

"All right, everybody," Brendan was saying, as he paced in front of the Gym with two starters and an Aron as his audience. "We need to come up with a strategy to beat Wattson, get his Badge, and move on to Verdanturf Town so Pikachu can get into her Contest. This strategy is...Jerry's Mud Shot."

"Mud Shot?" May repeated, almost offended. " _Just_ Mud Shot? The least you could do is train Aron until she learns a new, more powerful Ground-type move."

"But I don't know how long that will take," Brendan pointed out. "Mud Shot is more convenient."

Aron didn't mind. She'd only ever battled Wally's Ralts before, and thought it would be nice to be in an actual Gym match for once.

 **"You're just planning on letting us deal with it, aren't you?"** Adam asked, and she didn't even bother to show any regret.

 **"Of course. You and Jerry are the ones who know what you're doing. I'm the first-round sacrifice."**

 **"That can go either way,"** Jerry said under his breath, but Adam gave him a warning look over his beak.

Brendan, not understanding how to speak Pokémon, called them all into their balls. The pep talk over, he held the door for May and followed her into Wattson's Gym, mentally preparing for anything.

* * *

Wattson was a cheerful man, almost alarmingly so in the face of what his challenger had planned. Little did he know that the young, skinny kid was the son of a Gym Leader himself, and the ability to battle like a pro was apparently genetic.

The first Pokémon that Wattson called was a Voltorb. Aron could handle a single Voltorb on her own, and by the time he sent out his second choice, she had gotten used to being on the field.

"I've never seen that Pokémon before," Brendan commented, staring at the green Pokémon and searching his memory bank. "Where's it found?"

"Right outside of Slateport," May answered before Wattson could. "You would know that if you bothered to look at the Pokenav upgrade my dad made me give you."

Pikachu, who had been called out only to see the potential of Electric-types in battle, was pleased by the fact that her evolutionary line wasn't the only mammal-like family in their typing. She'd known to some degree, but she had only ever encountered Pichu, Raichu, and Magnemite before - not even a Plusle or Minun from her time observing Contests.

"Think you're ready for battle, then?" May teased. Pikachu made a face and mimed throwing something at the battlefield. "Yeah, I hear you. It's so much more fun when our pretty dresses don't risk getting blown up."

Brendan, impressed as he was by the live Electrike right in front of him, decided to keep his attention on the battle. The sooner this was over, the sooner he could go home and beat his father. "Come back, Aron. I might need you later." She turned and started walking back to her trainer before she was pulled back into the ball, and Brendan had his other hand on his next Pokémon. "Your turn, Jerry! Do the thing!"

One Mud Shot later, and the Electrike was unable to continue. The Magneton that Wattson sent out next was probably supposed to be a threat, but Brendan really wasn't bothered enough to not use Adam's Fire typing to his advantage.

* * *

The Pokémon standing across from Jerry now had to have been the evolved form of Electrike. Manectric, Wattson had said, for what little Brendan had been listening.

And why should he pay attention? His Aron knew Mud-Slap, he had two starters ready to do anything he told them to, and he was ready for the badge. The only thing standing in the way was the Manectric, and that should be an easy fight.

He'd tried to take it easy on the poor old guy, though. Spending years as a trainer only to lose to a new trainer with only one evolved Pokémon on his own team? That would be like Norman losing to Wally.

Wattson was on to him, though. "Thank you for using Water Gun on an Electric-type," he started, his near-constant laughter fading. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you've forgotten about the type chart."

"I didn't forget," Brendan insisted. "I just thought you might want to land a hit. You know, if anything Manectric can do isn't an Electric attack."

Wattson's laughter was still genuine despite the imminent loss. "I figured that," he said, voice booming. "Manectric, use Quick Attack. We want to get in one good hit in this fight."

Manectric, like Wattson, had accepted the inevitable, and it was a not-quite-Quick Attack that caught Jerry in the belly. Brendan, feeling that he'd done a good deed with that, instantly called for a Mud Shot.

Within five minutes, Wattson was handing over a small piece of metal he called the Dynamo Badge, and May was trying to find her way to the two with her Pikachu in her arms.

"You've earned it," Wattson told him, handing him the badge. "But, if you can, do you think you can help an old man by going on an adventure?"

"You mean an adventure within an adventure?" May asked, and he laughed again.

"Yes, you can say that. There were plans to make a new Mauville, when I was young, but they were shut down. But lately there have been...disturbances." There was a barely-there shiver in his voice now, and he was far too serious. "I'd go myself, but I'm not the man I used to be - thank goodness for that. You two are young and strong, and should be able to handle it."

May and Brendan shared a look, trying to communicate telepathically. When it became clear to them that they would need much more practice, if either were psychic at all, Brendan shook his head.

May went with her own answer, anyway. "How important is it, on a scale of one to ten?"

Brendan groaned in exasperation. Wattson didn't notice.

"I'd say about a four. Nothing to be concerned about at the moment, but at a level that demands attention before it can cause serious damage."

"I see." May turned to Brendan and nodded, then back at Wattson. "Call us again if you can't find a trainer to do it before the threat level hits six. No, wait, seven is a better number, it gives us more time to prepare."

"But the project -"

"Is nothing to be concerned about at the moment, in your own words. And what if it's a legendary poking around in there? Would you really send out two kids who barely have a full team between them?"

Wattson had no argument to that. "It's best for you to prepare," he agreed. "I doubt you have Surf yet, there have to be more qualified trainers."

* * *

"Any new Pokémon here?" May asked, as they peeked over the Day Care fence. "That you want to catch, I mean."

"Not really. A few Oddish, plenty of Zigzagoon, but nothing really speaking to me."

"What about Marill?" she asked, indicating the small, round Pokémon splashing in the water. "They don't take much to evolve, and there's a Fire-type Gym over in Lavaridge Town, which is where we're probably going next."

Brendan met a Marill's stare, and for a moment, he actually considered catching one. An Azumarill wouldn't be too hard to deal with, and he could actually use that new Fairy type that Kanto and Johto had yet to accept in the official battle rules.

And then the Marill shot a Water Gun at his head, catching him right at the hairline and knocking his hat to the ground. As the Pokémon laughed, Brendan fumed.

"I'll borrow Jerry for the Fire-types," he promised. "And when I rise to power, all Marill will be exiled to Unova. Then we'll see who's laughing."

"Them, probably." May made an 'I'm watching you' gesture, and the Marill immediately disappeared under the water. "They have numbers."

"I'll have my Shroomish and your Pikachu. We can take them on."

"Pikachu and I are going to be eating popcorn behind a glass wall, protected from stray attacks." May picked up his hat and squeezed the water from it before putting it back on his head for him. "Hurry up, Verdanturf is right ahead. You want to see Lisia again, don't you?"

Brendan pretended he didn't know what she was talking about. "If I wanted to see her, I could just watch her Contests on TV."

"You could," May agreed, "but that would take the fun out of a budding friendship, wouldn't it?"

Brendan let her lead again, pretending to be watching the Pokémon when really just wondering how he could get dried off enough before the next Contest.

He was being stupid. Lisia had more to do than sit around and wait for May's appearance. She might not even be there.

He hoped she would be, though. He needed to have somebody explain things to him when May was up on the stage.


	13. Pikachu's Performance

**In which Brendan is given something both very cool and very, very dangerous, especially in his hands.**

Verdanturf Town. There really wasn't all that much to say about it. A few flowers, a few houses, a few people, and single contest hall. The only remarkable thing about it was the gaping entrance to an abandoned tunnel, and the result of walking into it.

"Seriously?" Brendan had demanded when he'd noticed the only thing separating the overdramatic lovers was a pair of cracked boulders just a little too high for a person to jump over. "All you need is a Pokémon with Rock Smash or Fly, and I guess the right badge, and you wouldn't need to be sitting here crying over each other like Romeo and Juliet. Here, I'll show you."

Perhaps permanently adding an HM move to Aron just to make a point was a bad decision, but Brendan had made plenty of those in his past and was going to continue until his death, so there was really no reason for May to be looking at him like that.

The rock fell to pieces the moment Aron's head collided with it, and the couple swore their eternal gratitude right then. The woman promised to give both of them invitations to the wedding if the relationship got that far, but the man had a much better reward.

It wasn't as if Brendan knew what the stone was, but anything would have been a better reward to a twelve-year-old boy than an invitation to a maybe wedding.

"I think that's a Mega Stone!" Well, it seemed May knew what it was, and was very impressed. "What Pokémon is it for?"

The man frowned. "I think it's an Aggronite, but I can't be sure. It takes more than one big fancy rock to make Mega Evolution happen, and I don't have a Key Stone. Or an Aggron."

"Mega Evolution?" Brendan looked down at the rock, the so-called Aggronite, in his hand. "What's that?"

"It's evolution, except it's _more_ evolution," May explained, wringing her hands as she struggled to describe it without sounding like she'd committed her father's research notes to memory. "It's temporary and only achieved by certain fully-evolved Pokémon, like Mawile and Aggron. Not many people can do it."

"I know I can't," Brendan said at once. "I don't have a Mawile or Aggron yet."

"But Aron's final form is Aggron," the woman pointed out. "Just hang on to it. I can tell you'll be able to make it, once you get the Key Stone."

Brendan noticed that May seemed scared by the thought of him having a Mega Evolved Aggron. He immediately decided to keep the Aggronite. Who knows, it might actually come in handy against those stupid pirates they kept running into.

* * *

"You came!"

Lisia had shown up after all, and was more than a little excited to see Brendan and May inside the Contest building. "This is going to be so much fun, I'm almost never here _watching_ Contests."

"Why not?" Brendan asked. "You have to be there for the other people you scout, right?"

"Not exactly," Lisia admitted. "Most of them don't tell me when they're going to the next Contest, and I'm always stuck guessing. I was right this time, but..."

She pulled on her sleeve again, and her statement trailed off. They decided to leave it alone.

May broke the silence before it could turn awkward. "So, you're here for my performance in the Super Rank, aren't you?"

"I was hoping to see it," Lisia agreed. "Will you be entering with Surskit? Or is she a Masquerain now?"

"Actually," May said, picking up one of the balls on her belt, "I was planning to use my Pikachu. I figured she should get in one good performance before I give up."

Lisia's hands covered her mouth, and she stared at May as if the younger girl had just confessed to murder. "You can't just give up! You've barely started!"

May wasn't bothered. "I'm a writer, not a performer. I'm just getting my name out there so publishers won't overlook whatever I put out there in favor of more celebrity biographies."

"And how are you going to write an autobiography of a Contest star if you don't win at least one Master Rank?"

"Maybe I'll just write a regular biography about you. A master of the Master Rank at...how old are you, thirteen?"

Lisia's sleeve-tugging increased in intensity, to the point where she was plucking tiny bits of white fluff from them, dropping them to the floor. "Well..." she swallowed hard. "I am thirteen, and I am a Master Rank performer, but Ali is the more important one. And I don't live a very interesting life, nine times out of ten I'm just laying in bed watching anime on my laptop."

"I knew it," Brendan hissed in victory.

Lisia continued, pretending he hadn't spoken. "But you and Brendan are Pokedex carriers, you're destined for adventure."

"I would disagree," Brendan said before May could say anything else, "but we're being stalked by land-bound pirates and their Little Merman king. I'm pretty sure our destiny has been fulfilled."

"So you know what I mean." Lisia had that heart-melting smile again, her nervousness forgotten. "You're in this for life, May. Or at least until Brendan's in the Hall of Fame."

* * *

Laura had made Pikachu a new costume, a red coat and black pants with just enough wiggle room to poke her tail through. Pikachu had practically tackled the costumer in gratitude, and was now posing in front of the makeup mirror, trying to look tough.

"The costume was Lisia's design," Laura commented. "She would have had me make a boy-sized one if Brendan hadn't turned her down, or if Chaz didn't insist on dressing himself for his performances."

"I think Chaz is here for this one," Lisia said suddenly, poking her head through the door. "He must have heard about your last victory, May."

"I'm not competing against him, am I?" May knew that she wouldn't stand a chance against an experienced coordinator like Chaz, no matter how cool her Pikachu looked.

Fortunately, Lisia seemed to be thinking along the same lines. "Don't worry, he's only here to watch. He's already made it to Hyper Rank, he's not going to bother performing here again yet."

There was something about the way she said it that made Brendan want to ask, but he held it in. The performance was going to start in just a few minutes.

"Are you sure you don't want to match, Pikachu?" May was saying, offering her Pokémon a treat as an attempt at bribery. "It might make us more popular..."

"But she gets a super-cool move if she wears that particular costume," Laura told her. At May's confused look, she gestured at the costume. "Lisia discovered it. That Pikachu has a _very_ diverse learning ability, including moves that Pikachu can't usually learn. Haven't you wondered how she learned Draining Kiss?"

May hadn't wondered. She'd just thought that it was a move Pikachu didn't learn naturally, but that it wasn't unusual - an Egg move, perhaps, like her Surskit's Fell Stinger. "So she changes her technique...by changing her _clothes_?"

"We can't figure it out, either," Lisia said, more to Pikachu's reflection than to her friends. "I've never seen anything like it. I mean, I can _relate_ to it, I'm actually pretty shy out of the costume, but it's not the same."

She was tugging her sleeves again. So it wasn't just a habit, it was a way of coping when she was too far out of her comfort zone. But, once she'd pulled it back into place, she got to her feet and lifted Pikachu into the air, holding the Pokémon between herself and May. "It's too bad you don't do Contests, Brendan," she said, eyes darting from one reflection to the next. "These costumes look fantastic together."

"I hate you all," Brendan said at once.

Lisia, and May and Pikachu, took it to mean the opposite.

* * *

This was it. May could feel the crowd's excitement, and she knew that one more Cool move would help her score big. That was easy, Pikachu currently knew nothing but Cool moves, thanks to the costume. Still, it didn't help with the trainer's nerves, and she was clenching a tight fist around the hem of her performance skirt as she peeked through the curtains.

Lisia was in the front row, sitting between Brendan and a blond boy around their age that May dimly recognized as Chaz from the celebrity magazines she'd flipped through. He'd been alternating between watching Pikachu and attempting to talk to Lisia, unfortunately trying to get her attention at the same time Brendan did. At the moment, he was glaring at the oblivious Brendan as the others were waiting for May's call.

"All right, Pikachu," she said quietly, returning her attention to the Contest where it belonged, "we're up first, and we can score big with our next Cool move. So, I'm thinking we can show off Meteor Mash. Who knows, we might even get bonus points because you're a Pikachu."

Pikachu didn't seem to object to that plan, and quickly got into her position.

The Meteor Mash was flawless, and the roar of applause gave Pikachu the confidence to pull off a spectacular trick that impressed even Brendan, who was only there because May and Lisia were his friends. The performance finished, Pikachu returned to her trainer, trying not to look too smug.

"That's your new scouted talent, Lisia?" Chaz asked, and Brendan noticed Lisia roll her eyes a bit. "She's actually not bad. Where did her Pikachu learn Meteor Mash?"

Lisia let out her held breath. "A master never reveals her secrets," she answered, her dazzling smile fixed in place. "Surely you won't explain how you got to where you are with no family connections, mentors, or magic Pokémon, would you?"

Chaz made a sound of indifference. "She's not bad," he repeated, eyes narrowing a bit as he stared at the stage. "Not bad...in fact, maybe she's actually good."

* * *

"That was a great display out there," Lisia said, greeting May backstage after she'd gotten her second ribbon. "Maybe you'll even give me a run for my money someday."

"Maybe," May said, unsure of what else to say. "I'm in it for the fame and a chance to meet publishers, I told you that."

"I know, but if you win the Master Rank in all five categories, who knows who else you'll meet?" Lisia held out her hands in a square. "May Birch, daughter of Hoenn's top researcher, smashes through Contests and rises to stardom! 'Can It Be? Am I Really A Star?' That's what they'll call it, and the answer is yes!"

"But won't I be forced to be in Contests forever, when I'm a star?"

"Not really," Lisia said dismissively. "My uncle hasn't performed in almost two years, and he was as famous in the Contest circle as I am now."

"Speaking of your uncle," a voice said, and Brendan and Lisia immediately realized that Chaz had followed them into the room, "I saw him on the internet recently -"

"No you didn't." Lisia didn't seem to be disbelieving, but horrified. "He said he was going into isolation at the Champion's request."

"The Champion's request," Chaz repeated, almost as if he didn't believe her. "Why did he have to give up on Contests? I'm sure _he_ could have been May's Contest teacher instead."

"It wouldn't matter," Lisia pointed out. "She'd be on the stage either way."

"But then she wouldn't have gotten involved with our rivalry. I should be the only one allowed to defeat you."

Lisia sighed, as if this was a point that she'd already grown tired of repeating. "Chaz, look. You're usually a great guy, and when we're talking about things that aren't Contests, I'd like to think we're friends. But when our performances get involved, all you talk about are rivalries." She started pulling on her sleeve again. "I just...Contests aren't supposed to work like that."

"You'd only think so because you're good at them."

Lisia blushed and stared at the floor. "That's...thank you for the compliment, but it's Ali that really shines."

"I was using 'you' to mean your team," Chaz said, "but I suppose I should have clarified that." He seemed to have calmed down a lot, and there was no anger when he looked at May. "I'm not saying you're untalented," he promised. "But you're just a newcomer. You'll be competing in the Hyper Rank next, and don't be upset if it takes you a few tries. Losing is just a part of this life."

May kept her mouth shut, silently warning Brendan to do the same.

When Chaz left, completely ignoring Brendan as if he wasn't there, Lisia gave Pikachu a treat in an attempt to forget the conversation. "He'll get used to you," she said sincerely. "He's not always like that, I promise."

"But how long will it take?" May asked. Lisia made a face.

"Beat him in a Contest," she advised. "Then you'll have his respect, and when he respects you, he'll be more friendly."

Well, that was some good advice. The only problem with it was, May had no idea if she was ever going to use it.


	14. Ashes to Ashes

**It's a good thing they're in a video game, otherwise this might hurt them.**

They quickly discovered that the next Gym, the one in Lavaridge Town, had no direct connection from Verdanturf. So, after going back to Mauville, our heroes headed north, where they ended up in battle with a family who gloated about being some of the strongest trainers in Hoenn. Naturally, battling them four-against-two and winning didn't take long at all.

"At least you got to use Shroomish again," May said when Brendan declared them all a waste of time. "I'll admit, it feels kind of nice to see him with his real trainer for once."

"It's not my fault that Jerry was the better choice for the last two Gyms," Brendan protested. "Or the next one, apparently. You said that the Lavaridge Town Gym Leader uses Fire-types, right?"

"I did," May answered, but she didn't sound sure. "I think Dad said something about a recent switch? I'd call him, but I'm not sure how well the Pokegear phone works."

"How recent?"

"What day is it?" May's eyebrows scrunched again, and Brendan recognized it as her trying to think. "After your battle with Brawly, actually. I called Dad after I won the last Contest and he said something about a new girl getting the position from her grandfather. She might have changed the type specialty and it hasn't made the internet yet."

"The Champion lets her give out badges after only a few days?"

"Everyone's a beginner at some point," May reminded him. "We're new at being trainers, technically. Though you having three badges and my two ribbons might have moved us up to Super Rank, to use Contest terms."

"I guess so," Brendan said, pulling out the Pokenav for a map search. Lavaridge Town didn't even mention not having a new Gym Leader, and especially not a new type. But there was another Contest Hall in Fallarbor Town, which was close enough to Lavaridge. "I think we can stop in Fallarbor Town for the Hyper Rank Cool Contest before we go back to Petalburg, if you want to."

"Before Lavaridge?" May asked, almost hopefully. "I mean, Lisia did say that if I wanted Chaz to respect me, I should beat him in a Contest. He's still Hyper Rank, right?"

"I don't know," Brendan answered honestly. "I never met the guy until the last Contest. Though if I were you, I wouldn't consider Chaz to be boyfriend material."

May stopped walking. "What?"

"I saw how you were with Steven. You like good-looking guys in suits." When May still didn't move, Brendan turned to notice the disgust in her eyes. "Am I wrong?"

"Not...entirely," May said, grudgingly, as if admitting this was actually painful. "I like _pretty_ guys, suits optional but a nice bonus. Chaz is cute, I guess, but he's cute in the way you're cute, not cute as in 'my dream guy.'"

"So why are you bothering to try to get his respect?"

"Peace between Contest stars," May said at once. "If I refuse to be a rival, and Lisia refuses to be a rival, he'll have to accept that he's famous on his own, not because of his rivalry with Lisia."

Brendan accepted this as an answer, and for a while, they moved in silence.

"You know my type," May finally said. "What's yours?"

Brendan was confused for a few moments, at first thinking she was asking about his favorite Pokémon type. When he figured out she meant _girls,_ he started to speak. "I've never thought about it much. Girls mature faster than guys, that's science. All I know about my type is that it's definitely female and human. I've got a few years to figure the rest out."

"And here I thought I'd get to ship you with Lisia," May said, with a fake disappointed sigh. "I guess writing real-person fanfics of you guys will have to be a secret instead of something I can start stupid rumors with. Too bad."

He almost asked, but he was sure he didn't want to know. But being shipped with Lisia didn't sound completely awful.

After all, May was likely only teasing. He could have been shipped with a toilet.

* * *

 _The Fiery Path can be dangerous. Be careful, and take the cable car to reach Lavaridge Town or the summit._

That was what the sign said. How Brendan and May processed it was, _Go through the Fiery Path. Past experiences have taught you that the strange group of people in red hoods won't move until you do, so you might as well not even try._

They hadn't bothered to ask the strange people in red hoods. But if there was anything they were used to, it was being herded by cosmic forces to go a certain way. They couldn't rent bicycles at Cycling Road, they had to take the long grassy path underneath. They couldn't just skip defeating the Team Aqua grunt and rescuing Peeko, the Devon Goods were stolen with her and they had to keep them out of Archie's hands for some reason Mr. Stone never bothered to explain.

So, they didn't even bother, just started the long, slow march through the Fiery Path.

They felt the danger before they even entered. Brendan, though it was hard to tell if it was to prove a point or because he could, poured some Fresh Water on the floor of the cave. It took about three seconds for the water to bubble.

"Should we risk our shoes melting to catch Pokémon?" he asked, and May pulled out her Pokenav.

"I do kind of want a Torkoal," she admitted, "but forget it. I'll just come back later and stick around the entrances."

"I wouldn't mind if you stayed," Brendan promised. "I like warm places. Let's just get out of here within the hour, Torkoal or not."

May pulled Pikachu's ball from its holder. "All we need to do is drag one out of hiding. It shouldn't take long."

* * *

Once May's brand-new Torkoal was safe in his ball, they hurried out of the Fiery Path as quickly as they could, knowing that they would be cooked if they stayed any longer than necessary. On the other side of the path, they met a few trainers, the battle finally triggering the evolution of May's Surskit.

Torkoal and Masquerain aside, there seemed to be absolutely nothing useful on this route.

"Hey, kids! Do either of you have a Secret Base?"

Nothing except the TM for Secret Power, which could build them a Secret Base when used off the battlefield, but even as Brendan put it away in his bag, he had the feeling that he'd never really use it.

"It's the polite thing to do," May said when he'd asked why they bothered.

With that little bit of distraction out of the way, they continued the walk to Fallarbor Town, only to stop once more at what was ahead.

"What the H?"

Brendan wasn't used to swearing, and that alone stopped him before he could start. May was completely speechless. The route ahead of them was covered, completely _covered_ , in volcanic ash, and even more was raining down.

That wasn't even all of it. There were people out in this weird weather condition. There were Ninja Boys practicing their camouflage techniques by burying themselves in it. There was a girl with a parasol feeding Pokeblocks to her Numel. There were children playing in piles of volcanic ash.

"And I thought this stuff was dangerous to inhale," May said, reaching out and catching a few flakes.

"So did I." Brendan kicked the grass, sending another cloud of soot into the air. "But they're all fine. Maybe it's a magic volcano."

May thought it over. "Sinnoh does have legends about a Pokémon called Heatran. Their mythology called it a volcano god, or goddess, depending on the myth. Some even say there's two, one male and one female." She pointed to the sky. "Maybe Heatran knows people like to hang out here?"

"Even if Heatran is on our side, I don't want to anger it. Let's just get out of here as soon as we can, and not stop for anything."

They ran as if they were back in the Fiery Path, with even less concern about catching Pokémon.

* * *

Finally escaping to Fallarbor Town, they found the Pokémon Center immediately. They'd gotten into trouble with a Skarmory clan, but Adam and Pikachu had kept them at bay long enough for their trainers to make an escape.

"Is there going to be a Contest here in the next day or two?" May asked the nurse as her Pokémon were returned to her.

"Well, there is a Normal Rank Cleverness Contest," the nurse answered, by now used to answering questions much less related to her job than this. "Are you going to enter?"

Cleverness? May wasn't sure she had a Pokémon with more than one Clever move. "Not likely," she decided. "Maybe next time we pass through."

"Next time we see Lisia, anyway."

Brendan was completely oblivious to the fact that he'd name-dropped a celebrity until a swarm of Lisia fans swept up to them, asking questions.

"Are you in Contests, too?" one girl asked, getting a bit too close for Brendan to be comfortable.

"The girl is," a boy said, wisely keeping away from May. "These were the kids Lisia scouted back in Slateport City. I saw the Contest on TV."

"She is?" Another boy dared to take a step forward. "How many ribbons do you have? And could you get me Lisia's number?"

Brendan reached for a ball, and soon enough his Shroomish was sprinkling Stun Spore around in a circle. The eager Contest fans backed off immediately.

"I'm not getting _anyone_ a date with Lisia," he said, almost dangerously. "And I can't convince her to scout any of you. I'm not even sure if we could get her autograph. Leave us alone."

The fans backed off, more out of fear that the Stun Spore would hit them than that they were listening. May watched them leave, then slapped her friend's shoulder.

"You didn't know for a fact they were fame seekers," she hissed. "They could just be pushy Contest fans, you know. Do you get people asking for your dad's autograph from you?"

"They know my dad can be found in the Petalburg Gym," Brendan answered at once. "I'm not sure how these things work. Better safe than sorry, right?"

"I've never thought of it like that." She didn't seem willing to think of it now, either. "Well, there's nothing for us here. We'll check out Meteor Falls and then head back to see if the people in the red hoods are gone."

"And if they aren't," Brendan gestured to his Shroomish, "we'll just make them move."

May didn't seem to mind this time. She just raised an imaginary glass. "Forget the rules," she said happily. "We have connections!"

Brendan reached up to bop her fist with his. She was finally getting it. "Hooray for going mad with power!"

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (male Combusken) Shroomish (male) Aron (female)_

 _May: Jerry (male Marshtomp) Masquerain (female, evolution mentioned but not shown) Cosplay Pikachu (female) Torkoal (male)_


	15. Meteorite Madness

**In which we finally get to meet Team Magma.**

When May had gotten a call from her father asking if she and Brendan would go and see Hoenn's other important scientist (not that Professor Birch had used that description) the kids had expected boring science-y stuff, notes that May would send back home by transferring a Pokémon to her dad. Instead, they learned that Professor Cozmo had been kidnapped and his assistant was a wreck.

And, conveniently, the people who took him were wearing red hoods.

So now the two were on a much more important mission to Meteor Falls, having left Cozmo's assistant a sobbing mess on the floor. No one had bothered to come along and chaperone, obviously, but they were used to only having the other to rely on in tough situations.

"I still don't get why _everything_ has to be us, though," Brendan said as he followed May into the cave. "We're not on reality TV, are we?"

"Of course not," May said, waving her hand dismissively. "We're good friends of opposite genders, but we're _just_ good friends, and that's too boring for people obsessed with shipping. Reality shows would have had us fight or tried to hook us up or something."

"But this is more than a coincidence."

"That much is a given." May stopped to take a seat on a rock, pulling the tiny book and green glitter pencil out again. "From all the stories I've read, I'd say that either we're on a quest mapped out for us by ancient gods before we were born and this is the only way we can fulfill an ancient prophecy, that we're in some kind of video game and we're up for the roles of protagonists, or that we have really, really bad luck."

Brendan had learned to roll with her ideas, and it didn't take him more than a second to form his reply to that statement. "Or maybe the prophecy mentioned that the Chosen Ones were really unlucky in everything not directly relating to Pokémon."

"That would explain a lot," May agreed, not looking up from her book. When she'd finished writing whatever had come to her head, she got to her feet and put her tools away. "Well, I'm done. Let's go get that meteorite before Professor Cozmo's assistant can drown the town in her tears."

* * *

What they found was exactly what they'd expected to see when they got there. Perhaps they'd expected the man who seemed more commanding of the others to be a bit less chubby, but they were right about almost everything else, right down to how the red hoods seemed to be a mark of an organization.

The heavy man was not surprised to see them. "Are these the people you were talking about?"

"Yes, sir," said a red-hooded minion. "They were the ones that chased Team Aqua away in Slateport City. I heard them talking about it in the Pokémon Center before they left to see Lisia."

"But they're kids."

"Yeah," Brendan agreed. "That's what Archie said when we beat his minions. And that's what Blar-Blar said when we beat him, too."

"Who's Blar-Blar?" the hooded grunt asked.

"Some guy in Team Aqua. That's not really his name, but it's fun to say."

The man glanced over at Professor Cozmo, then called a grunt to his side. "Then we'll have a double battle here," he decided. "You two against me and her."

Brendan chose his Pokémon first. "Shroomish, do the thing!"

"Torkoal, take the stage!"

The people in the red hoods each had a ball in their hands, apparently waiting for their opponents to choose their partners first. When they saw that what they were up against had no super-effective type against the Pokémon they planned to use, they called their own team to the fight.

And Professor Cozmo's protests fell entirely on deaf ears.

* * *

"This is stupid."

The man, who had been addressed by his partner as Tabitha, was not pleased with his loss, for obvious reasons - he had a Numel, and May had wisely substituted Jerry into the battle. It hadn't ended well for him at all.

"You can't go up against Team Magma alone," Tabitha continued, well on his way into a villainous monologue. "We have the meteorite! With our leader's genius plan, we'll win this war yet!"

"Just like you won that battle, eh?" Archie asked, making his grand appearance with an Aqua grunt on each side.

"I was out of practice," Tabitha insisted. "I'd like to see you do better."

"Oh, I'm sure I can. I actually _lead_ Team Aqua. What do you do over in Team Magma? Aren't you Maxie's coffee boy?"

Tabitha didn't answer. "You kids will get it one day," he promised. Then he focused on his grunts. "Come on, you. Let's go find Maxie and Courtney. They're waiting for this."

He held out a large rock that they assumed was the meteorite in question, and had their suspicions confirmed when Professor Cozmo tried to grab it. He was knocked away by the female grunt that had partnered with Tabitha for the battle, and the red-hooded people walked out of the cave, silently gloating.

Archie's fists clenched. "Team Magma," he hissed, as if the name itself left a bitter taste in his mouth. Then he focused on the grunts, who all jumped to attention, waiting for orders. "Go after them. I'll join you soon, I have children to distract."

The grunts ran after Team Magma, but Archie blocked Brendan and May from the path. "You really aren't working for Team Magma, are you?"

"No," Brendan answered immediately. "We've never even heard of Team Magma until today, and we really didn't want to get involved."

"That's a good idea, kid. Keeps your girlfriend out of harm's way."

Archie seemed to notice May's sound of disgust, if how happy he seemed was anything to go by. "She's not my girlfriend," Brendan said anyway.

"Of course not." Archie dropped the subject, at least. "Am I right when I say that you have no intention of joining Team Magma?"

"As right as you'll ever be," May answered immediately. "Which isn't really saying much, is it?"

Archie pretended not to notice, but his next words came out sounding more than a little defensive. "But you won't join Team Aqua, either."

It was not a question, or a ban to keep them from following him, but a statement from a man who knows his plans were at risk. "No," Brendan said, "we're not."

"We could use people like you. Those who have a real talent for battle even at a young age. But I'll admit it, it is your decision. Just try to stay out of our way in the future."

He started off, ready to catch up with the grunts. With only a moment to alter his train of thought, Brendan grabbed Professor Como by the arm.

"Let me go!" the professor cried, trying to pull himself free. For an adult, he had a surprisingly weak struggle. "Team Magma must be stopped! That meteorite can't fall into the wrong hands!"

Brendan didn't relent. "We'll get you home first. How much damage can Team Magma do with a meteorite, anyway?"

"That sounds an awful lot like tempting fate, Brendan," May pointed out. Her hand rested on the pocket of her bag that she'd put her writing supplies in. "And trust me, I don't think we're strong enough to actually stand a chance against what fate might throw."

Brendan groaned. "Fine, we'll go get your stupid space rock. Get your own butt back to Fallarbor Town, we'll come back later."

"You have no intention of coming back."

"You're right," Brendan agreed. "I don't. But I do need to get you that rock, so I'll send somebody."

"Let's hope you can stand against them," Cozmo said, but May forced a smile.

"Don't worry, Professor," she said, faking politeness. "Brendan and I have experience. We'll make them see. And if not, we'll call in Brendan's dad."

The thought of having Norman fight Brendan's battles for him was almost embarrassing. He'd do it himself, with or without May.

No, he'd better do it with her. Every hero needed a sidekick, and May was the only competent person he knew.


	16. Team Magma's Song

**My sister didn't really want to do a Team Magma villain song. She said Maxie doesn't really look like a guy who would do this. I told her that neither did Ghetsis, and he was the one that started this tradition.**

 **This one is a parody of "The Boogeyman's Song" from Nightmare Before Christmas. It's her favorite Christmas movie, and I wasn't wrong in assuming she couldn't resist helping me with it. (She wrote the non-musical parts in that scene)**

The two spent the night in Fallarbor Town, hoping for a Hyper Rank Cool Contest to open up and trusting that Archie and Tabitha would end up taking each other out. It's not that they believed either were good, it was that Tabitha was pretty bad in battle for a guy that seemed to be in charge of the Cozmo kidnapping, and that Archie was at least competent enough to get followers.

Let's not put too much thought into how wrong they were, and just roll with it.

When they learned that none of the day's scheduled Contests were the one they were looking for, they packed up and prepared to go back through the Fiery Path.

"I'm still surprised we're not dying from this stuff," May commented as still more ash rained down on the pair. "This isn't what it said on the internet at all."

"Maybe the internet's wrong," Brendan suggested.

"It could be, but what about science?"

"Maybe science is wrong." Brendan flicked some ash out of his face. "I doesn't matter how we're still alive, does it? We just have to get back to the cable car and down to Lavaridge Town for my last badge before Dad. The new Gym Leader shouldn't be too hard, should she?"

"You'd be surprised," May said softly. "Don't they have to pass some kind of battle test? I think it was beating the Champion, just the Champion, with only their own type specialty. But then, that could just be rumors."

Brendan did actually remember Norman going to Hoenn for a full week before he called and said that he was Petalburg City's new Gym Leader. He'd just thought it was because he wanted to escape the shame of the Great Soda Incident. Perhaps to put a bit of distance between him and his criminal son.

"You might be right," he said, once he'd thought about it. "Did you research it for your writing?"

May's laughter bounced off the mountains. "Of course I didn't, silly. I don't trust myself with battle scenes yet."

Brendan rolled his eyes. "That explains a lot."

* * *

There were no red hoods at the other end of Fiery Path. They'd expected that.

They even expected to see Team Aqua and Team Magma grunts fighting around a volcano, if only a little.

"The town's down that way," Archie said when they found him, facing three Team Magma grunts on his own. "You two should be getting your badge or whatever it is you do. Leave Team Magma to us."

"We would," Brendan said, "but it looks like a battle is blocking the exit. So, we figured we'd help you out here."

"I thought you weren't on our side."

"We aren't." May pulled a ball from her side, one that probably held Jerry. "But we're not on their side, either. We help who we want, and today we help you."

"Why?" one of Archie's opponents complained. "You're humans! Humans are _land_ creatures! You should be on our side! Archie should be on our side!"

"I'm not completely sure he isn't a merman," Brendan stated, and Archie laughed.

"That's something I hadn't heard before," Archie said, almost proud. "Pirate, sure, but never merman." He gestured farther up the volcano. "Maxie's up there. He's got a minion or two up there with him, but the worst of it is that the idiots are trying to use the stolen meteorite to...I don't know. Pump the volcano with energy or whatever and make it erupt to get new land masses."

The children stopped in their tracks. "What."

"I never said it made sense," Archie pointed out. "The darn thing's in the middle of a continent already. I would have used the meteorite to turn the volcano dormant and fill it with rain water, but then," he took a moment to call for an attack, "I'm not the moron in control this time."

"No," said another one of his opponents, "but you're the moron who thinks that these kids can stop Maxie from doing it, so who's the bigger moron?"

Archie's expression didn't change, but his voice was harder when he spoke to Brendan and May. "Go on, kids," he ordered, forgetting for a moment that they weren't part of Team Aqua. "Show them why my grunts fear your presence."

They didn't need to be told twice. "That's cool, though," Brendan said as they headed off to the next step of their journey. "We're feared. I've always wanted to be feared."

May grinned back. "That explains a lot."

* * *

One double battle with Magma grunts later, the two found Tabitha once again. He was speaking to a woman, who was wearing a different hood than the female grunts. It must have been Courtney. No other female Team Magma member had been named, even in passing.

Tabitha saw the pair and stopped mid-sentence. "Tell the boss," he ordered. "I'll hold them off as long as I can, but they defeated me before."

Courtney had That Look - the one that said 'Tabitha, these are children' - but she didn't say the words out loud. Instead, she chose to follow orders, stopping to look back in confusion only once.

Tabitha sighed, selecting his Pokémon. "All right, kids," he said, resigned to his fate already. "Let's get this train wreck rolling."

It really didn't take long for Brendan to beat him, even with the Poochyena and Zubat added to help his Numel, and the extra Numel that he hadn't had before. Shroomish even evolved into Breloom after defeating the Poochyena.

May hadn't gone after Courtney, choosing to stay behind with Brendan in case he lost and needed her to step in. But, when she was sure he was going to stay with her, she was the one who led the charge.

Maxie wasn't very impressive, in appearance. Where Archie was a muscular merman pirate, Maxie was a slim scientist, wearing what appeared to be a bright red lab coat and sweater tights under shorts. The only thing keeping the kids from laughing was the little bit of sunlight getting through the cloud of ash bouncing off his glasses in bright, horrifying spots.

"You were right, Courtney," he said, his voice quiet, yet another counter to Archie. "They do seem to be quite young. Barely of Pokedex age."

"Hey!" Brendan snapped. "I'll have you know we're _twelve,_ and the minimum age for a Pokedex is _ten._ We're old enough and then some!"

"Twelve is still much too young to be playing around a volcano," Maxie said, as if they weren't aware of that fact themselves. "Go and train your Pokémon somewhere else."

"We can't. We've promised Archie that we'd stop your stupid meteorite plan before you can kill off the surrounding towns."

Maxie's stern face broke. As the music began, and Courtney pulled her hood over her eyes so she wouldn't have to witness the insanity about to unfold, May seemed to catch on to what was about to happen. Brendan started putting it together only when he heard his friend's desperate pleas. "Maxie, are you sure people do this kind of thing in real life? We'll stop you anyway, you know! This won't help us take you seriously!"

That seemed to be Maxie's plan.

 _"Look at them.  
_ _They're finally here.  
_ _They're much too young to stop us, there's no reason to be scared.  
_ _ **You're** the ones giving Tabitha trouble?"_

Apparently, people actually did do this in real life. Who would have guessed.

 _"They can't be. They're children.  
_ _I can't believe my eyes.  
_ _You're kidding me, you have to be  
_ _Do you know what this implies?_

 _They're small, and pathetic  
_ _I don't know which is worse.  
_ _That they're at a volcano  
_ _Or that they're trying to save the earth."_

Brendan wondered if he could film this and show it to the police, but he quickly decided against it. The cops would never believe him.

Besides, he didn't have a video camera with him. The Pokenav lacked that important function.

 _"Listen now, and listen hard  
_ _There's trouble close at hand  
_ _We have to work together if we want to save dry land_

 _"And if you stand against us  
_ _Then feel free to run along  
_ _But this may be the only time  
_ _You hear Team Magma's song."_

May facepalmed. "And I thought this was just something my mom did," she sighed. "I guess some people just have that talent for being annoyingly musical."

Brendan looked hopeful. "Is it genetic?" he asked, and May looked up briefly.

"What?"

"Do you do this kind of thing? It's kind of creepy, but you have to admit, it's a catchy tune."

Well, she might as well try. The world was already going down in flames.

 _"Stand down at once or you will face some dire consequences.  
_ _The Water-types still need the sea, so please come to your senses."_

The words came to her easily, in part because she'd seen the movie. It still took her by surprise when she actually did it with no prior rehearsal.

She was twelve years old and already becoming her mother. But at least she knew where her writing ability came from, and why the professor said that he fell in love with his wife during her time as his voluntary test subject.

Brendan didn't seem to find anything wrong with her, though. That was a relief.

Maxie didn't, either, but that was because he had the same problem.

 _"She's done it. She's singing!  
_ _She's pretty close to tears!  
_ _I promise you, for all to see  
_ _There's no need for those fears._

 _"I don't want to hurt you  
_ _And your fish friends will be fine  
_ _As long as they stay in the lakes  
_ _And don't try to cross the line."_

May's teeth clicked together. "Do we really have to finish this?" she asked, almost frustrated.

"We've come this far," Maxie pointed out.

 _"The sunlight falls onto the ground  
_ _Heating up the air  
_ _We'll still have pools and drinking water  
_ _As the ocean's bed goes bare_

 _"Against Team Aqua, I'll admit  
_ _Your victories are fine  
_ _But to let you stop Team Magma  
_ _Well, I'll just have to decline."_

Brendan jumped in, saving May with the next line.

 _"So what's your plan, let the seas dry  
_ _And all the Pokémon will fry?"_

There wasn't a moment's pause, as if Brendan had the song disease, too.

 _"You two sure are something  
_ _I don't know where to begin  
_ _We'll still have a lake or two  
_ _To keep the fishes in_

 _"You can't fight, it's hopeless  
_ _You really can't compare  
_ _You failed to stop Team Magma  
_ _Your plans are going nowhere."_

It was done. Tabitha and Courtney blocked the exit, but it was Maxie that reached for a ball.

May grabbed one of her own before Brendan could take the opportunity. "I'll fight," she promised, letting him sit back and relax. "I'll fight him, and I'll win - consider it revenge for putting us through a terrible musical number."

* * *

Masquerain defeated the Mightyena with a few fast Fell Stinger attacks. She had Pikachu for his Zubat. And with Jerry, his Camerupt didn't stand a chance.

Maxie's expression of pure shock was brief but amusing. "So you're stronger than I expected. It doesn't matter. You've won here, and we will leave quietly." He adjusted his glasses, the shine blocking out his eyes. "But know that you have not seen the last of Team Magma, and the next time we meet, your victory will not be assured."

Archie arrived only a few seconds after Maxie left, before May could investigate the meteorite machine. "Thank you," he said, sounding like he meant it. "You've stopped Team Magma for me. You won't have to do it again."

"I wouldn't count on that," May said, rolling her eyes theatrically. "We've helped you today, but don't think we're on your side."

"Speaking of your temporary alliance with Team Aqua," Archie interrupted, "where is the meteorite?"

"Courtney took it with her," Brendan explained, and May spun to look at the empty machine. "Sorry."

"Oh. I see." Archie turned to leave himself, but looked back at the kids. "Keep your eyes open for more Team Magma activity. I'd like to work with you again."

"You'll be working against us, too," May reminded him.

Archie wasn't bothered. "We'll see."

Once the pirate merman was out of earshot, Brendan pulled the meteorite out of his bag. "So what do we do with this?"

May's mouth fell open. "But...didn't Courtney take that with her?"

"Huh?" Brendan looked down at the meteorite, then back at his friend. "I lied. I didn't want Archie getting his hands on it."

"But how did you do that without us noticing? I get Maxie and me being distracted by the battle, but Courtney was watching the whole time."

"Who said it was the battle? I used the _song_ as a distraction, Courtney covered her eyes for the whole thing."

He looked so proud of himself, May had to laugh. "Your new nickname is Sneakers," she decided. "It fits and it won't get you in trouble with the law."

"Only if I get to call you Songbird," Brendan retaliated, putting the meteorite back in his bag. "You have to write my theme song now, there is no other option. And we'll start our own team, based on the sky or something. We'll call ourselves Team Breakneck, and our goal will be to take over Hoenn before either of those idiots get the chance. I'll be the Maxie, you be the Tabitha. Lisia can be the Courtney."

"What about Wally?"

"He can be our spy in the other groups. Now, for our uniforms, I'm thinking green..."

Team Breakneck. It wasn't the dumbest thing she'd ever heard, or even been a part of. "We'll have to ask Lisia and Wally," she decided. "And then we'll have to send out recruitment ads. It's going to be a lot of work."

"Which is why we'll do it together," Brendan promised. "You and me and Wally and Lisia, the four most powerful kids in the world! With our strength combined, nothing can stand in our way!"

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (Combusken) Breloom (evolved in this chapter) Aron_

 _May: Jerry (Marshtomp) Masquerain, Pikachu, Torkoal_


	17. Burn, Baby, Burn

**Flannery makes some very bad decisions. Do not question them. (And the ending was the only ending that sounded right)**

With both teams gone and the volcano free from trouble, Brendan and May could go back to Fallarbor Town and return the meteorite to Professor Cozmo before heading on their way to the next Gym.

Instead, they headed down to the next town anyway, the meteorite with them, and planned to send it to Professor Birch through Pokémon transfer. It was easier, they told themselves, and then Birch could listen to Cozmo's weird science monologue and save the kids from being bored to death. It was better for everyone.

The path from the volcano to Lavaridge Town wasn't the best place to carry a valuable item, but the Spoink that had stolen it from them had been more than happy to carry it for them. Once Brendan had captured him, that is.

"You're perfect for each other, Sneakers," May said, giving Brendan a pointed look. He just forced an expression of pure innocence.

"What do you mean by that?"

"I thought it would be obvious." May gestured between him and the little hopping pig. "You're both criminals that need to be stopped."

"Is that what we are?" Brendan looked horrified. "Are we really criminals? Breaking the law for the good of the world? Wasn't that what Robin Hood did?"

"Technically," May said, her smile not quite genuine. "I think I read somewhere that Robin Hood actually only stole what belonged to the poor anyway, what the rich took as unnecessary taxes and stuff. Not the stuff that the rich had rightfully earned or inherited. That's why they were still rich so he could rob them again."

He tried not to egg her on any more. It would get old sooner or later. He could already tell that Spoink, bouncing along behind them, was already getting bored of it.

* * *

"May, you sent me a _meteorite_ with your Masquerain."

"I know, Dad," May said, trying to keep from sounding disrespectful. "And now it's up to you to get that back to Professor Cozmo. You're a scientist, he's a scientist. I am not, but he might think I want to follow in your footsteps and share his notes with me."

"It did make news when the Unova professor's daughter decided to get the title for herself," Birch confessed. "And Cedric did call it the 'family business' at one point. I'm sorry if the Juniper family ruined your life."

He wasn't serious. May knew her father would have loved it if she decided to be a researcher, too. "And I'm sorry that I'd rather look important science facts up on the internet instead of trying to find my own answers to unexplained questions, like where Pokémon eggs come from."

"You're a bit too young for that kind of work," the professor said immediately. "And don't try looking that up."

"I wasn't planning to. Ever." May tried to force the question from her mind, and decided a subject change was in order. "What can you tell us about the new Lavaridge Town Gym Leader?"

Professor Birch pulled a small notebook from his lab coat pocket. "She still uses Fire-types," he told her. "She's apparently a redhead who can't stand the cold, so keeping the type specialty was the natural choice."

It seemed like everyone around them was becoming like their famous relatives. Lisia and her uncle, the Gym Leader and her grandfather, the Junipers. Perhaps there wasn't hope for Brendan and May except what type specialty and field of study they wanted.

No, May was sure that this wasn't for her. She liked to learn, but putting that knowledge into fiction was where she shined, and she couldn't imagine Brendan battling professionally forever.

"And do you have any Water-types you can lend Brendan for this?" she asked. "When can you send them?"

Her father refused. "I'm not allowed to help with Gym challenges. I only provide Pokémon to get a trainer to the next location."

So it was up to Jerry again. Fine, he was almost more used to battling for Brendan than he was for May. "Is there anything at all you can do for this, Dad?"

"Other than wishing you good luck? No. But good luck to you both anyway."

He signed off before May could think of a response. She took a deep breath in, slowly let it out, and stood up. "Hey, Brendan! If you want to trade, we'd better do it now!"

* * *

"I've never had Pikachu before," Brendan said as they slowly walked through the Gym's hot-spring floor, water seeping into their socks.

"Well, Aron wasn't a good choice in a Fire-type Gym," May reminded him. "Rock-type is good, but Steel-type isn't."

"But Pikachu is a Contest Pokémon."

"So? Everyone wants to try new things someday. She wanted to help you get the badge."

Pikachu was in her ball, so Brendan couldn't ask for her confirmation. "Can you guess which rocket geyser will take us to the Gym Leader?"

"No, but I can guess who we're going to sue now." May covered her eyes with one hand, and used the other to point. "Eenie, meenie, minie...you."

Well, that was how they'd been making their decisions all day. It couldn't hurt.

The girl they assumed was the Gym Leader was a redhead, as promised. What the kids hadn't heard was that she apparently liked to style her hair to resemble an enormous fire, and they barely restrained themselves from laughing.

The Gym Leader was equally surprised. "I wasn't expecting challengers to make it this far so soon," she said, but then stopped in her tracks. "Um, I mean...ok, let's start that again." She cleared her throat and forced her face into something vaguely resembling a threat. "Puny trainers, how dare you trespass on my...no, that's not right, either."

May couldn't help it. She covered her mouth, but she couldn't smother the giggles. "She looks like a Cyndaquil trying to be a Machamp," she whispered to Brendan.

"Or like a really angry Vulpix," Brendan agreed.

The Gym Leader's fingers curled at her sides, as if she was even more determined to prove she wasn't a cute toddler who stumbled into the big-girl leagues. "I-I am Flannery of the Lavaridge Town Gym," she recited, like she had memorized a script and was a really bad actress. "With skills inherited from my grandfather, I-I'll crush you!" She pulled a ball from her belt. "Well? Which of you is the challenger, and which one is going to take them back to the Pokémon Center?"

A newbie Gym Leader, who looked no older than nineteen, and her army of Fire-type Pokémon against Jerry, Adam, Pikachu and Spoink. Brendan almost felt sorry for her.

"Jerry, do the thing!"

Hey, it was an 'almost.'

* * *

Brendan had to admit, she deserved her position. She wasn't a damsel in distress, that much was obvious.

Brendan had thought it would be easy. After all, Jerry was a Water-type with Water-type attacks, so the Fire/Ground combination of her Numel and Camerupt were almost too easy. Then her Slugma actually _was_ too easy. But her Torkoal was another story.

Brendan had thought it was going to be another one-hit KO, of course. He hadn't even switched out Jerry, instead calling for another Water Gun.

Flannery had come prepared. "Start the battle with Attract!" she commanded, all traces of the confused newbie gone and replaced with confidence.

Jerry didn't know what hit him. Well, technically, he did - a string of pink hearts aimed for the face wasn't exactly hard to miss. But his half-second of preparation did nothing to lessen the effect when the attack did hit.

May squeaked at the sight of her very first Pokémon unable to attack the Torkoal he was convinced he was in love with, partly out of concern for his emotional state, but mostly, it was for what she sensed was going to happen seconds before it actually did.

"Torkoal," Flannery called when she was sure that Jerry wouldn't be attacking that turn, "use Overheat!"

Well, May had been expecting a Solarbeam. She'd heard that some Fire-types could use it. And with Camerupt's Sunny Day setup, it wouldn't have been out of the question.

But Overheat would have packed a punch even without the Sunny Day boost, and Jerry was completely out in one hit.

"I should have known," Brendan said to himself as he called Jerry back. "That Slugma was a piece of cake."

The Attract hadn't been necessary, but he understood that it was a method to avoid retaliation in case Jerry made it through. And since Adam and Spoink were both male and vulnerable to Attract...

May made a good call in taking his Aron and lending him Pikachu.

Flannery tried to suppress a sound when she saw Pikachu, heart-tipped tail marking her gender, wearing her Cool costume. "I've heard about this Pikachu! She finally found a trainer?"

"She's May's," Brendan said, keeping the explanation brief. "How do you know this Pikachu?"

"I've met Lisia. Tried a Contest with Torkoal a few years ago, and she and her uncle were watching. He asked me to take a Pikachu when the costumer found her trying on hats, but I told him that Wattson was the better choice. It looks like May was even better for her."

She said it like meeting two celebrities at once was no big deal. "Did they tell you why this Pikachu likes playing dress-up so much?"

Flannery looked confused. "No."

It seemed that fate did have pity on Brendan, after all. "Then let me show you. Pikachu, Thunder Wave!"

When the Torkoal was paralyzed, Brendan slipped into the next move. "Now show off with Meteor Mash!"

"Meteor Mash?"

It took more than one hit, but Sunny Day cleared up and the paralysis kicked in, so even after he had to replace Pikachu with Adam, it only took one Double Kick.

* * *

Flannery seemed to be deep in thought, giving Brendan his badge without a word. Brendan, not used to such silence on the part of his opponents, immediately asked if she was really so surprised that she lost.

"It's not that," Flannery promised. "I was just thinking about how I should change my opening speech. Like you said, I probably did come off looking a bit like an angry Vulpix, and I'm too old for that."

"Really?" May had that look in her eyes, one that promised curiosity and invasive questions. She had that same look back when she asked Roxanne about Nosepass boogers. "How old do you have to be before you give up using being cute as a weapon of mass underestimation?"

Flannery didn't seem to mind that she had just been asked about her age. "Would you believe me if I told you that I'm turning twenty-one in November?" she said with a smile, as if no one ever did.

"Not really," Brendan confessed. Nineteen or twenty, he'd believe, but anything older than that was stretching it.

Flannery shook her head, the smile still in place. "No one ever does," she said, laughing a little. "Just trust me on this, and you'll see why I need a few changes in my opening monologue. I wasn't planning on demanding a rematch or anything, I promise."

"I'll write your speech," May started, but Brendan shushed her.

"No, she won't," Brendan said, putting his badge in its case and leading May away. "Is there anything more unreasonable you'd like us to do before we go? Save the town from a maniac, stop the volcano from erupting...?"

The Gym Leader thought hard. "No," she finally decided. "I think you're good here. But if you see my partial fiancé, tell him I need _him_ to put a stop to Team Magma, they give Camerupt users a bad name."

"Partial?" May asked, again with that special look of pure curiosity. "You're _partially_ engaged? How does that work?"

"It's a long and complicated story that you probably don't want to hear," Flannery promised. When May refused to move unless she got the whole thing, she was forced to continue. "We're not really...we're just..." She blew her hair out of her face. "It all started with a picture getting leaked on the internet."

"I'm sure it's a nice romantic tale," Brendan interrupted, managing to force May to move once again over her very vocal objections, "but we wouldn't know the guy if we saw him, so goodbye."

"It was a joke, I'll call him. Don't worry about it." Flannery said something under her breath. May didn't hear it, and Brendan couldn't understand the context.

As they left the Gym, May turned to Brendan, the curious look in her eyes replaced with hurt. "That sounded like an interesting story," she complained. "Why did we have to miss it?"

"Because sharing personal details with a writer is one way to get them published."

"But it was a _funny_ story," May complained. "I could tell that she _wanted_ to tell somebody. This might be her last chance until she's got kids asking about it."

She said nothing about not using it for her own work, though, and Brendan noticed that. Well, he supposed that whatever it was beat the sunset-and-beach proposals he'd heard about, especially if nothing was official and there was no ring in sight. After all, a leaked picture wasn't romantic. Was it?

Dang it, now he wished he'd stayed to listen.

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (Combusken) Breloom, Aron, Spoink_

 _May: Jerry (Marshtomp) Masquerain (with Birch until further notice) Pikachu, Torkoal_


	18. The Family Business

**This one almost didn't make it. You're lucky the other writer is dedicated to our work. (On a related note: visitors two weeks in a row interrupted writing time. We're not _that_ lazy)**

"Sure," Lisia said over the Pokenav phone, which Brendan had decided to call to test it out. Apparently, she had connections to Devon herself, through this supposedly famous uncle of course. "I'll be your third officer. Team Breakneck, was it? I'll have to ask Laura to make our uniforms. Does the shade of green matter?"

So it began. Brendan had to hide how happy he was that she'd agreed. "You could do mostly black with green as a secondary color, May says. I haven't put much thought into it."

Lisia laughed. "It's not a big detail, don't worry. I'm assuming Pikachu might want something to match?"

"She might. I don't speak Pokémon."

"Did Lisia say yes?" May asked, and Brendan held a finger up to demand quiet. "Hey, who agreed to make Team Breakneck a thing? I deserve recognition, darn it!"

"Shut up, will you? I'm trying to get Lisia to use her influence to get us some more minions."

There was a reluctant hum from the other end of the line. "I don't know about that, Brendan. Fame is a great power, and with great power comes great responsibility."

"Is that what your uncle told you?"

"No, that's what superheroes taught me. I thought boys were into that stuff." She seemed to be having fun with the idea. "You're procrastinating on facing your dad in a battle, right? That's what this call was about, wasn't it?"

"No!" Brendan's answer came a little too fast, but it wasn't a lie. He liked Lisia and was getting excited about building his own evil empire with her and May as his backup. So what if he was a little nervous about going up against Norman? It wasn't anything he couldn't handle. "I can go and battle my dad at my own pace, this isn't a procrastination call."

"So are you on your way to Petalburg City right now?"

Brendan tried to come up with a response to that, but his brain had other ideas. "Just go and do your performance thing already, May and I can handle things without you."

"I'm glad we had this talk, Brendan," Lisia teased, but the sounds of lasers in the background meant that she'd turned her show back on. So her anime selection wasn't exclusively 'magical girl.' That, or the genre actually had some decent options. "Meet me at the Contest Hall in Lilycove City, you can check out our team uniforms when you get there."

She ended the call before our heroes could do anything more. But she had made a good point, and Brendan and May decided that they'd done enough procrastinating.

It was time to go meet Norman.

* * *

Going through Mauville to Verdanturf, then through the now completed Rusturf Tunnel and finally through Petalburg Woods, the two found themselves back in Petalburg City, staring nervously at the Gym.

"I'm not sure about this," Brendan said, not even trying to keep his nerves hidden. "My dad might not want us here. I threw a public temper tantrum once in recent memory, and then there was the soda thing."

"You were moving to an entirely new region. I'm pretty sure he doesn't blame you for the tantrum."

She didn't sound positive, though. She'd never seen Norman as a father, only a Gym Leader. But if he could be friends with Professor Birch, he couldn't be a bad person.

They'd been standing in front of the Gym for a while, neither of them willing to enter first but both knowing that unless he got the badge from his father, Brendan's journey to the honorary Championship would end here. He really couldn't tell which he would've preferred.

May was the one who pulled the door open, letting Brendan go inside first. "Norman's not here. You should be safe."

"Maybe he went home to see Mom," Brendan suggested, turning to go right back out the door. "I kind of miss her, too. Let's go back to Littleroot Town and just stay with our parents for a day or two."

"But what about Team Magma and Team Aqua? They won't wait for us to spend time with our families." She stopped, making her thoughtful face again. "Will they?"

He hated to admit it, but she was right about that. He turned around again, checked on Adam and Breloom, and started the march to the doors in the back of the Gym. There had to be some kind of puzzle, like Flannery's rocket geysers or Brawly's obstacle course of death.

The first door was marked with a sign that said 'Speed Room.' The other was marked with a sign that said 'Accuracy Room.'

"Speed and accuracy?" May asked, looking at Brendan in the hope that Norman had explained things to him. Seeing that her friend was just as confused as she was, she turned her attention to the Gym guide that they hadn't noticed. "So...we should ask him about it, then?"

"Nope," Brendan said, pulling her into the Accuracy Room. "We'll wing it. It's worked for us so far."

Well, he had a point there.

* * *

Adam had evolved into Blaziken in the Accuracy Room. Brendan took that as a sign that this battle was going to go as well as the other Gym battles. He didn't want to lose against his father.

Choices were made by the usual 'wild guess' movement, and even Aron got to shine in the One-Hit KO room, her Sturdy ability making all attempts to use such attacks utterly worthless.

"And you're sure you don't want Jerry, who has way more battle experience than Spoink?" May asked, stopping just in front of the Gym Leader's door. "No one has to know, we'll just swap Pokeballs here."

"No," Brendan said, though his hand did pause on Spoink's ball for a short second. "I will defeat my father with my own team. You can understand that, can't you?"

"I'm the only one in my family with a talent in battle. I could sweep any team my dad assembles with Masquerain alone." May placed her hand on the doorknob but didn't turn, looking Brendan in the eyes with an entirely serious face. "I would definitely not understand."

"Maybe you're the wrong person to talk to," Brendan decided. "But the point stands. It's a pride thing."

May smiled innocently and opened the door.

The room was open and well-lit, but that did nothing to calm Brendan as he tried to process that he was finally going to battle with Norman. It was the ultimate father-son bonding activity, and he was not ready.

If Norman had any doubts of his own readiness, he didn't show them. "You've gotten stronger," he noted, believing that to be the perfect ice breaker. "It's not just your Pokémon, Brendan, but you yourself."

"I'm not really sure how that works," Brendan said carefully, trying not to panic. This was necessary, and Norman had told him to come back once he had four badges. "My Pokémon do the battling, not me."

"And yet they follow your commands. You're a team, Brendan." He spared a glance toward May. "And I hear you're in Contests now."

"Two Cool ribbons," May said, forcing a smile to hide the fact that she had never felt more like a third wheel in her life. "It's about as impressive as four badges - halfway to the mega stardom and all."

"Yes, I suppose so." His attention went back to Brendan, who wished it wouldn't stay long. "As I promised, I will have a battle with you. But I warn you, as a Gym Leader, I will do everything I can to win."

"As a challenger," Brendan said, "I will do everything in my power to not lose."

Norman laughed at that, just a small chuckle. "Then let's get down to it."

* * *

Norman's Spinda didn't stand a chance against Brendan's Breloom and his Mach Punch. But the Spinda was like Flannery's Slugma, there to fill a spot on the party and tire out an opposing Pokémon's super effective moves. The Linoone wasn't much better. The Vigoroth, on the other hand, was a tough opponent, but Brendan managed through a combination of Aron's Sturdy and relentless Rock Smashes and Hyper Potions.

He knew what his father had in store for him, and he was not disappointed.

The Pokémon was big, fat and lazy, but Brendan knew not to underestimate it. He'd heard about the power of Slaking.

"You know what to do, Adam!"

Adam did know what to do, and started the round with a Double Kick. The immediate retaliation of Façade wasn't a surprise, but Brendan wasn't sure whether to take advantage of the relatively useless Truant ability for another Double Kick or to heal Adam's Façade-induced injuries.

"Is that all it can do, Dad?" he asked, nerves gone by that point as he formed a plan and backup plan in his head. "Façade? I guess you can't teach an old Pokémon new moves."

Slaking, taking offense to the comment, pointedly scratched its butt.

"Is that all you want, Brendan?" Norman asked, almost a warning. "You only want me to give a different command?"

"It would be nice," Brendan said, not seeming to notice. "Adam, use Double Kick again!"

Slaking took both hits, letting Adam take a turn with no retaliation. Then Norman took his son's advice and made the first command.

"Slaking, prepare Counter for..." His voice died as he saw Brendan bring a Super Potion from his bag and start spraying it on the mostly-unharmed Blaziken. "What are you doing?"

"Wasting a turn," Brendan said casually, covering Adam's minor scrapes with Super Potion.

Well, that left Counter to be completely useless, leaving Slaking open for another Double Kick attack. "Clever child," Norman admitted to himself, somewhere between proud and annoyed. Brendan tended to invoke that reaction a lot in his parents. He made a mental note to go back to using Façade. And so he did, letting the next Double Kick strike and taking the turn after that to use a Hyper Potion before the next attack could take Slaking out of the battle.

May slumped in her seat, unable to suppress a groan. "I wish I had one of my story notebooks," she said to the floor, refusing to accept her fate of utter boredom. Slowly, she forced herself to tune out the battle, and was eventually rewarded for her efforts by calling to mind her latest idea.

She wasn't sure what she would call it, but there was a team of bad guys, not entirely unlike Team Magma and Team Aqua, who went around stealing Pokémon from trainers. She should probably name them Team Something, too. Not Team Breakneck, of course, they were _her_ team, but something similar...

Team Stormbringer? Team Nightshade?

She'd work on that later. Right now, she just needed something to pull her attention away from the battle and everything related to it, before Brendan started to cheat.

She wasn't sure how cheating would work, but she wouldn't put anything short of murder past Brendan at this point. He'd looked pretty frustrated.

* * *

Brendan and Norman caught on to each other's battle strategies pretty fast, and as a result, the near-winner was constantly changing. Once, Brendan took advantage of Slaking's ability to switch Adam for Breloom again.

Then came the deciding move.

"Slaking, use Façade again!"

"Breloom, Counter!"

Slaking moved surprisingly fast, and Breloom had to act even faster. But by the time the smoke cleared, Slaking was finally down, and Breloom was giving a loud war cry.

May jolted to attention. "Did you win?" she asked stupidly, blinking reality back into focus. "Is Slaking down? Does he have another?"

"He won, May," Norman promised, calling back his Slaking as his son ran up to congratulate Breloom. May swore she heard her traveling partner promise to use no Pokémon but his own in battle from now on. "He's won five badges now."

"Speaking of my fifth badge," Brendan said hopefully, "can I have it?"

"You'll get it, Brendan," Norman said, pushing away the boy's eager hands. "This is not a moment to be taken lightly. Your Pokémon, and you, have grown stronger still in our battle. You might want to take a moment to respect that."

There was a moment of silence as Breloom retreated to his ball. Then Brendan slowly held his hand out again, an eager smile on his face.

Norman facepalmed and handed over the Balance Badge. "I thought you would have learned patience by now."

"Of course not." Brendan clicked the badge into place, and turned to leave. "Thanks for the battle, Dad! Next time you see Mom, tell her I said hi."

"Wait!" May squeaked, holding out a hand to stop her friend from leaving. "Before we go, I want to hear a certain story about Brendan's experience with the law."

Brendan groaned. "No, May. You don't."

Norman understood too well. "Is this about the soda thing?"

"YES it's about the soda thing! I've been dying to get an explanation almost since this journey started, and Brendan never told me!" She stamped her foot like teenagers on TV, not seeming to process that she'd done so. "Please, Mr. Norman? I've already missed one fascinating story from a Gym Leader, I don't want to miss another one."

"Dad," Brendan warned, "if you tell her the shoplifting story, I swear I will never come back to Petalburg City as long as I live."

"As tempting as that sounds, I wasn't going to tell her," Norman reassured him, letting him know that the first half wasn't serious. "But do you really think that the girl you're traveling with doesn't deserve to know why you're a wanted criminal?"

He was teasing, Brendan knew, but he also knew that May was going to bug him until he told her. So, he decided to let the co-founder of his evil organization in on one secret.

"All right, Songbird, listen up." Norman's confusion by the use of codenames was quickly wiped away by the fact that all kids went through a spy phase. "I'm only going to tell you this once, and you had better not use it in a speech at my Champion inauguration, your book dedication page, or your speech for if we manage to conquer Hoenn and you become vice president. If you do, it's instant termination from Team Breakneck and my friend list."

"Can I work it into a Space Heroes fanfic?" May asked. "Possibly for my 'self-insert' character?"

She'd made the quotation marks with her fingers, but her point was made. Everyone does dumb things. Brendan, rather than give her permission, drew a deep breath. "It was right after Dad told me he was looking for a new job, hopefully in the Gym Leader position..."

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (Blaziken, evolved after first warm-up battle) Breloom, Aron, Spoink_

 _May: Jerry (Marshtomp) Masquerain (with Birch) Pikachu, Torkoal_


	19. A Legendary Meeting

**In which Latios is the most sane character we've ever written.**

"...and that's how an attempt at shoplifting turned into charges for resisting arrest, which turned into disturbing the peace, which ended with some guy accidentally assaulting an officer." Brendan tried not to make it seem like he was proud of the direction it had taken, but his audience knew better. "I'll admit, the banana was overkill, but it was funny."

"And that's not even getting into what happened in the courtroom," Norman added. "He got off due to a technicality and was only forced to pay for the soda and extra damages, but I extended my job search to outside of Johto. And here we are now."

May's eyes moved between her friend and his father, her disbelief clear. "So Brendan's the reason you guys moved?"

"I didn't know that," Brendan complained. "Why didn't you tell me? Don't you know that I'd _brag_ about forcing my family to move to a whole new region instead of complaining about it?"

"That isn't something I'd like the world to know," Norman told him. "A Gym Leader's reputation is important. Imagine what the world would say if they found out I couldn't keep my own son under control."

"I just got sick of being asked if I was going into professional battling myself, and I acted out a little. Once people heard what job you were after, they just asked me if I was going to 'continue the family business' and how good I'd look with Pokémon."

"I know that feeling," May agreed. "Ever since Cedric Juniper in Unova told the world exactly what it was that his daughter was going to do with her life, I got comments on how I've got my mom's good looks and my dad's brains. That wasn't bad, but when they started assuming that I'm going into research because I've always got a notebook and pencil on me..."

"That," said Professor Birch's voice from the door, "would be wonderful. But it wouldn't be right." He tossed her a red and white ball, and it brushed against her fingers before falling to the floor, releasing the reasonably angry Masquerain.

May didn't know how long her father had been standing there, but she didn't want Brendan to tell the story again. "You knew we were here?"

"I had to give you a proper goodbye, and your Masquerain needed to be returned. I couldn't help but overhear the end of that tale." Brendan looked proud of himself. Professor Birch did not. "May, do you want to come home with me? Your books are waiting."

"Sorry, Dad," May said, linking her arm with Brendan's. "Someone has to keep this lunatic out of trouble, and I'm the token good influence."

"It was an offer, not a request." The two dads made eye contact. "And, Norman, do you remember a child named Wally?"

"I lent him a Zigzagoon a while back," Norman said, trying to think. "I haven't heard from him since he returned it."

"I have. He apparently thinks I'll look after a few of his extra Pokémon for him." He gestured outside. "I have his father out there waiting to speak to you, and I think the boy himself might be coming for a battle."

"I'll be ready." Norman looked back at the kids. "Isn't Wally traveling with you?"

"We haven't seen him since Mauville," Brendan answered, "but we have something important to talk to him about. If he has a Pokenav, tell him to play around with it until he finds the phone setting. Then..."

He and May gave their contact numbers to their fathers and started off, on to continue their journey.

The dads stood there in silence, until their children were gone. "It's strange," Norman said after a moment. "You have kids, and then you wish they weren't around."

Birch knew exactly how to finish that sentence. "And then when they're gone, you wonder why they left so soon."

Norman chuckled. "They could have turned out worse, I suppose. At least Brendan's not getting into drugs or gang fights."

"All that can be hoped for," Birch agreed, not seeming to notice that his old friend took it the wrong way.

"Speaking of our children, haven't you noticed that your daughter has an unnatural ability to turn off what she perceives as reality? I saw her during the battle, she was making faces at nothing."

"She does that," Birch said, "and her mother and I had her tested just a few years ago. It just means she's writing something out in her head."

"You waited that long? I remember visiting when our children were five. She was singing along with a Barbie movie and changing the subject of the song from 'life as a princess' or whatever it was to 'life as a toilet.' I understand your wife has a strange musical habit, but you're ok with that?"

"She was _five,"_ Birch repeated. "Five-year-olds and toilet humor are inseparable. At least my daughter isn't a felon."

Had it been anyone else, Norman would have dropped contact at worst and hissed "That's not funny" at best. But, since it was Professor Birch, he let it slide. "Just wait. She'll get into trouble someday. They all do."

"And at least she'll have your boy to bail her out. The kid's loyal to the ones he trusts, and that's always a good thing."

* * *

Unaware of their fathers' conversation, Brendan and May continued on their way to the next Gym, which, at Lisia's suggestion, was in Fortree City, close to Lilycove City and its Contest Hall. From there, they planned to check out Laura and Lisia's designs for the Team Breakneck uniforms, maybe get the next Cool ribbon, and end up making their next decision there.

Of course, as they found themselves entering the nearly endless Mauville City for the third time, they were stuck on what to do next.

"We're supposed to cross water to get to Fortree," May said as she checked the map. "If we borrow a Pokémon from my dad, it should only take us an hour to make it to the Berry Farm."

"Berry Farm?" Brendan repeated, not sure he wanted to know. "Why are we going to the Berry Farm?"

"I thought they might give me Pokeblock tips," May answered, putting her Pokenav away and giving Brendan her biggest puppy eyes. "That, and they might give us shelter for the night. I heard it can get pretty rainy up by the Weather Institute, so I want to have a place to sleep."

Brendan wasn't going to stop her. "Pokeblocks are like Rare Candies for Contests, right?"

"I guess so."

"So you don't need to beg me, there's nothing wrong with wanting to do something with them. Lisia and Chaz won't take it easy on you, so you need any advantage you can get."

May gave him a dirty look. "It's nice to know you have so much faith in me, Brendan."

Brendan just faked innocence again. It was almost suspicious, the way he always went right to that. He must be stopping himself from making some kind of comment that he knew she wouldn't want to hear.

Deciding to end it there, May started back to the Pokémon Center, calling Brendan along. It did not escape his notice that she didn't make sure he could catch the door before it closed.

Maybe he was a bad influence. It wasn't like he cared.

* * *

When Brendan called the borrowed Wailmer back to his ball, he wasn't really expecting familiar faces. So, naturally, when a silver-haired man in a nice black suit jumped the ledge, Brendan stumbled back, letting out a squeak he would never admit to.

Luckily, May was distracted by Steven's presence again, and Steven would never break a preteen's fragile masculinity by mentioning it.

"We met back in Granite Cave, didn't we?" Steven asked, and May nodded weakly. "I thought you looked familiar. Brendan and May, right?"

May made a sound that could only be spelled as "squeep."

"Yeah," Brendan said, nudging her to bring her out of her infatuation-induced distraction. "And you're Steven Stone. Now that the reintroductions are out of the way, do you mind telling us what you're doing here instead of in a cave somewhere?"

"I had business in Fortree City," Steven explained. "And now I'm on my way home to get something from Devon."

"Taking the scenic route?" May questioned, surprisingly alert now. "Or just stopping random trainers?"

Steven was spared from answering that one by a Pokémon descending from the sky. It looked like a fusion between a bird and a plane, and Brendan was tempted to make a joke. But something in the Pokémon's eyes told him not to.

"Latios," Steven whispered, awed into near silence. "A legendary Pokémon."

"But what's he doing here?" May asked, and Latios jerked his head to an island in the distance.

Steven could guess from that. "You want to show us something?"

Latios let out a desperate cry and lifted all three humans into the air with his psychic powers, before zooming off and taking them with him.

"I'm taking this as a yes."

* * *

There was something off about this island, and Brendan knew he wasn't the only one to feel it. May and Steven both seemed anxious about the place.

Not that it stopped Steven. "Is this one of _those_ islands?" he asked Latios. "Are you one of the Pokémon credited with giving Mega Evolution to humans?"

Latios made an angry sound, gesturing wildly to a point in the distance. He must have wanted them to investigate, but not want to be seen himself. That could only mean one thing.

"Take your pick, May," Brendan said, keeping his voice low so Steven couldn't hear. "Team Magma or Team Aqua? Winner gets the glory of beating whoever it is."

"I'll go with Aqua," May decided, her own voice a whisper. "We haven't seen much of them being evil lately. They have to prove they're not reformed somehow."

"But we've seen more of them," Brendan pointed out. "I'll accept Magma as an opponent."

Steven, not having heard the conversation, was slowly moving in the direction Latios pointed him in. Not wanting to be left behind, the children followed, and it didn't take long before they found what they were looking for.

"I guess we both lost this one," Brendan said, as the red and white Pokémon watched them carefully.

"I've always been bad at gambling," May replied, as Steven stepped past her.

"Latias," he said, in the same voice that he'd named her male counterpart in. "Is it you who sent Latios for us? What is it you wanted from us?"

Latias whimpered, focusing on a point between Brendan and May's heads. The three humans all turned, and the sight that greeted them made all of their confusion go away.

There was a girl dressed like a pirate, easily a Team Aqua grunt. The man beside her, while definitely not Archie, clearly outranked her. He was missing a shirt, and his pants were torn at the top like he was once wearing a wetsuit but shredded it by flexing his enormous muscles. There was an enormous, Team Aqua styled A on his chest, and it was hard for May to tell if it was a tattoo or a carefully arranged tan line.

It was also hard for Brendan to keep a straight face, despite knowing what the team stood for and wanted to do.

The big man seemed to recognize Steven, but not Brendan or May. The grunt, though, seemed very aware.

"Those kids were with Mr. Archie and me when we went to stop Team Magma at the volcano," she said, pointing them out unnecessarily. "They're always getting in our plans _and_ Team Magma's!"

"Rogue agents," the man said shortly, comparing Brendan and May's head sizes to his biceps. Or at least that's what it looked like to them. "They're not to be trusted."

"And neither are you," Steven said, apparently not at all intimidated by the pirate who looked like he could snap all of them in half. "Your last encounter with Brendan and May was peaceful. What are you doing here with Latias?"

"Brendan and May, huh?" The man looked again at the kids. "Our last encounter with Brendan and May was when we were united against Team Magma. We had nothing against them, and used the meteorite incident as grounds to forgive them for keeping the Devon Goods out of our hands. If they stand aside now, we'll still be on reasonably friendly terms."

"Yeah, about that." Brendan gestured to May, who shook her fears aside to stand tall. "I've started my own team, and May is my second in command."

"The Shelly to your Archie, then?" the grunt questioned, and the man laughed.

"I'll bet you two don't have any underlings," he said, and Brendan looked ashamed. "Team Aqua? We get new recruits every week. Archie even recorded a message so he wouldn't have to greet everyone personally anymore. Do you even have anyone other than the two of you?"

"Yes," May said, crossing her arms in defiance. "Contest star Lisia has agreed to join us, AND she's got her personal costumer making our uniforms."

The grunt mirrored her pose, and with Archie's third-in-command standing behind her, it was much more intimidating. "Mr. Matt, we're here for the Latias," she reminded him, and Matt jumped back to reality.

"So, you thought you could distract us. Well, the joke's on you - this grunt is undistractable."

May's nose wrinkled at the wrong-sounding word, but Steven stepped forward to speak. "The Latias isn't going anywhere with you. You're outnumbered, and we're stronger than you are."

"Oh, we're outnumbered, handsome," the grunt agreed, "but Matt didn't get his position in Team Aqua just by being friends with Mr. Archie and Miss Shelly. Your team has a _performer_ ranking third."

"Our team's new," Brendan complained.

"And your team has no way to research Mega Evolution." Matt could easily push past them and grab Latias, but decided not to. "Your ambitions are cute, kids, but you're messing with the big names in Hoenn now. Try again when you're older."

"My dad does better research in Mega Evolution than you guys," May snapped. "Heck, Brendan's dad does better research, and he's a Gym Leader!"

"A Gym Leader's kid, huh?" Matt grinned. "Are you going to have Daddy come and fight for you?"

"Daddy," Brendan hissed out the word, lacing it with as much sarcasm as he could manage, "is taking a challenger right now. But I've got his DNA, so I should be good enough for you."

"Brendan," May said, holding out a hand. "I won the bet, remember?"

Oh. Right. "This isn't over," he promised, fixing Matt with a look that could melt steel. "Agent Songbird, it's time for war."

"And I will fight beside her," Steven declared, and both he and Brendan pretended they didn't notice how happy the decision made her. "We will protect Latias together."

Matt glanced at the grunt, who nodded back and sent a Grimer into battle, which Steven countered with a Metang.

"Sharpedo!" Matt called. "Take them down!"

A Sharpedo, huh? Then her choice was already made. "Pikachu, take the stage!"

* * *

Electro Ball was a fun, useful move that worked in mysterious ways. One moment, Pikachu was getting Crunched by Matt's Sharpedo, and the next, she had launched a ball of lightning right down her opponent's throat.

Sharpedo was fine, of course, but it was exactly the kind of dirty trickery that made Brendan proud. It seemed to make Matt equally proud.

"That was a good move," he commented. "I love strong, opportunistic people. That's why I follow Archie. And that's why I'm going to keep an eye on you and your friend here." He held a large hand over his heart. "I give my word that I will not snap your spines and take the Latias and her Mega Stone."

"And you'll leave Latios alone, too, right?"

"Yeah, sure. But you won't have it so easy next time. I'll smash you good, girlie. I'm on to all your little tricks."

She was positive that he didn't think a tiny little Pikachu could pack a Meteor Mash or a Draining Kiss by simply swapping clothes. But once he and the grunt were out of earshot, Steven turned to face May, and the light of the setting sun illuminated his head like a halo.

Or maybe that was her imagination playing tricks on her. She wasn't sure.

"You were a real help," he said, almost too proud for words. "The Electro Ball right into the Sharpedo's mouth was something I've never seen."

"The Sharpedo was already attached to her tail," May said, trying for modesty and barely missing. She was happy with how it turned out, too. "We just made the best out of a bad situation."

"I should at least heal her for you," Steven said, and May reluctantly handed over Pikachu's ball.

As he was giving Pikachu a Hyper Potion and a few Leppa Berries, Latias came up to May and dropped a shiny stone on the ground in front of her. May bent down to pick it up, and held it carefully as she examined it.

It was a Mega Stone, of course. She'd never seen one of these, but she could guess that it was a Latiasite. Latisite? Did Latios and Latias share a Mega Stone? She'd seen that their Mega forms were identical in all ways but gender, so it wasn't entirely out of the question.

When Steven gave Pikachu back to her, fully healed, he also offered her a shiny bracelet with a brightly colored stone on it. "I think Latias wants to come with you on your journey," he said, and May jolted back to Latias in surprise. A legendary Pokémon? Choosing _her?_

"I don't know. I'd love it if she did, but..." May looked back at the stone in her hand.

"Do it," Brendan ordered. "We can't afford to not have her on our side. And if that bracelet can trigger Mega Evolution, and I'm pretty sure it can, we could use that to make Team Breakneck an official threat."

"Team Breakneck?" Steven repeated. "Why Breakneck?"

"Because _Maxie_ has Team _Magma_ and _Archie_ has Team _Aqua_." Brendan shrugged. "I decided to make a sky-based parody team, and my name started with a B. It made sense at the time."

May grinned at Latias. "Are you sure you want to put up with this?"

Latias had to stop and think, but she eventually decided that it was better to join than to be left behind. Latios returned just in time to see her willingly jump into an empty ball.

May adjusted her bag and played with her new Key Stone. "Thank you, Steven. I might not ever get her to Mega Evolve, but it's nice to have the Key Stone anyway."

"Understandable. I just thought you and Brendan would like to match."

And he held out an identical gender-neutral bracelet to Brendan. The look of terror in May's eyes (she clearly remembered that he had both an Aron and an Aggronite) was more than worth it. Brendan, remembering both facts himself, eagerly took the Key Stone from Steven's hand. "Thanks, dude. Here I thought that accepting gifts from strangers was a bad idea."

"We're not strangers," Steven reminded him. "We met back in Granite Cave."

"Yeah, whatever." Brendan looked over at Latios. "What about you? Latias went with May, so that means you want to come with me, right?"

Latios wasted no time in flying off as fast as he could.

May put a hand on his shoulder. "Don't worry, Brendan. You'll get a legendary one day."

"Knowing my luck, it'll be a Manaphy."

"Don't _ever_ say that about yourself." With no further comment, she released Latias. "Carry us to the Berry Farm," she ordered. "I told Dad to pass on the message that we were coming."

Brendan could think of better things to do with a legendary than travel to berry farms, but he kept his mouth shut. Latias wasn't his.

He could always cause region-wide terror when he got his own legendary.


	20. The Weather Institute

**The writers have spoken. Shelly has arrived.**

The elderly couple that owned Hoenn's Berry Farm were used to opening their doors, and their crops, to kids on a Pokedex journey. They knew Professor Birch pretty well, and though they had never met his daughter, they were more than willing to let her and her friend sleep on their floor before heading out to stock up on berries in the morning.

"So are you helping your father with research, May?" the old man asked, unaware of her feelings on the matter.

"In a way," she replied, picking a few Cheri Berries from a tree. "I'm mostly doing my own thing, but this _is_ a Pokedex journey. I'm supposed to look for new and undiscovered Pokémon."

Brendan, who seemed to have made it his goal to pick every Leppa Berry on the farm, stopped mid-pluck. "We are?"

"That's why the professors do it, and why the Pokedex carriers have to be recommended."

"Not us," Brendan protested.

May dismissed it. "He knew that I could handle the world, and you saved him from a wild Pokémon. We're not full exceptions."

The berry man chuckled. "Well, you kids seem to be getting into trouble on a regular basis, I hear. The professor told us that you had an encounter with Team Aqua and Team Magma."

"You've heard about them?"

"Only from Professor Birch," the man clarified. "I wouldn't know who they are, only that they hate each other and have bad ideas."

"That's all you really need to know," Brendan said, returning to his berry picking. "We can handle them, we have Mega Evolution now."

May moved on to the Sitrus Berries, all with a smug smile. "You don't have an Aggron yet. I can do better." Ignoring the fact that she didn't have the supposedly necessary bond with Latias, having only just saved and obtained her the previous evening. She still had a legendary, which was more than Brendan could say.

Brendan pretended not to hear her. He'd get his revenge someday.

* * *

"Let's make one thing clear," Brendan said as he and May carefully made their way through a patch of grass that was taller than they were. "Once _we_ rule Hoenn, it will be illegal for grass to be any taller than the average ten-year-old child to see over. I will have patrol Pelipper flying around to make sure of it, and send Adam to burn down any grass that breaks that rule."

"I'm not sure setting stuff on fire is the way to solve that particular problem," May said calmly, pushing aside some grass so she could see properly. "But I agree with the general idea."

"And how would you suggest solving the problem?"

May's answer was immediate and obvious: "Herbivores. Pokémon that live by eating grass. We'll tie a bunch of them to Pokémon who know Fly, and have them graze off the top."

"But can a Swellow lift a Miltank?"

She didn't answer that one. "Swords," she decided after a moment of consideration. "Better yet, _chainsaws_. Chainsaws are good. Not as pretty as a sword, but much faster."

Brendan had a good laugh at imagining his second-in-command with a chainsaw, but regretted it when he ended up with a blade of grass going down his throat.

"I'll burn this thing down first," he declared once he'd gotten it out of his mouth and the coughing fit had stopped. "We'll use the chainsaws when it grows back."

For that, May had to agree, especially when one blade of grass managed to bend itself back up and into her nose.

* * *

She'd been wrong about the rain around one route. Brendan wished she hadn't been. It would be easier to deal with rain than whatever this was.

There were two pirates guarding the bridge that they had to cross to reach Fortree City, presumably guarding the Weather Institute behind them from the Fortree Gym Leader.

Brendan wasted no time in going for the building. "They should have guarded the door," he pointed out, pushing that very door wide open. "Or at the very least locked it."

"It's Team Aqua," May reminded him. "Only Archie and Matt seem to have any brain at all."

"And even then it's half a brain between them," Brendan agreed. "Well, let's go. They aren't going to take themselves out."

May didn't comment, but Brendan knew what she was thinking.

There were more pirates inside, waiting for intruders. May briefly considered using Latias to sneak back out to Mauville City and buying a pair of blue pirate costumes, but she silenced those thoughts and followed Brendan, carefully avoiding being seen.

There was a more distracted group, consisting of about four or five grunts, who seemed to have a betting chart up and running. They were including calendars for the next five years, but the kids couldn't see what it was before they had to duck behind a computer desk. By the time they felt safe coming back up, the gambling chart had been taken down and the grunts spread.

"We have to find out what they were all making bets on," May said as she followed Brendan up the stairs. "You know that, right?"

"No," Brendan replied, not in answer but as a command. "We really don't."

"We really do," May insisted. "It's for research purposes."

"No, we don't. It's for _sanity_ purposes."

May might have insisted further, or perhaps made a face or pretended to pout, but the pair had reached the top floor, and had immediately come face-to-face with a pair of Team Aqua grunts.

"Shelly had a feeling we'd bump into you two," one of them chuckled. "We've all heard about you. Tell us - whose side are you on now?"

"We're on our own side," Brendan said, and the pair of pirates didn't even seem surprised. "We want to see your leader - this Shelly person, was it? Let her explain your plan, and we'll consider joining."

"Actually," the other grunt said, a wicked smile slowly breaking across his face, "she gave us pretty clear orders. If we see kids snooping around the Weather Institute, we get rid of them."

"You really don't want to try," May warned, and anyone more aware of the trail of destruction she and Brendan usually left behind them would have left them alone. Instead, these idiots seemed to take the warning as a challenge.

As they sent out their Pokémon for battle, Brendan looked over at his friend. "They deserve what's coming to them."

"You know what they say." May picked her first Pokeball. "Ask, and you shall receive. Pikachu, take the stage!"

"Breloom, do the thing!"

* * *

With the grunts beaten, Brendan and May were free to move on, and it didn't take them long to find who they assumed was Shelly. It wasn't a far leap - her uniform, if one could call it that, was almost entirely different from what the female grunts were usually seen wearing. She was standing guard over hostages, obviously smart enough to not trust the grunts with such an important task.

Why she thought that they could get rid of Brendan and May was a question best left unasked.

Shelly immediately guessed who they were, as well.

"So you're the kids Archie was talking about," she commented, almost casual for the situation. "I thought the grunts could stall you for a while. I never expected you to win in just ten minutes."

"Archie's encountered us enough that you should have." Brendan carefully held Breloom's ball. "And you use Water-types and May has a Pikachu."

Shelly wasn't sidetracked by the statement. "Why do you try to stop us? You're not on Team Magma's side any more than you're on ours. You should just be innocent spectators."

"True," Brendan admitted, "but we left innocent behind the minute Tabitha kidnapped Professor Cozmo. We're Team Breakneck now. Land and sea are both under the sky, so both you and Team Magma will be crushed under us." He shrugged. "It's logic, Shelly."

But Shelly was shaking her head in disbelief, and even her hostages weren't so much scared as they were confused. "That's not how organizing a team works," she said quietly, almost as if disappointed, but then she returned to the subject. "I don't like to hurt children. I have standards. But if those children need to learn a lesson, I have no trouble using force to get it through their heads."

Brendan and May, not for the first time, tried to telepathically communicate. "I'll teach you a lesson myself," Brendan decided. "Namely, why you should listen to your boss when he tells you that two kids thwart your plans at every turn."

* * *

Since Shelly only used a Carvanha and a Migtyena, Breloom had no problem sweeping her whole team by himself. Her defeat only seemed to make Shelly angrier, but upon hearing that Team Magma was on their way to a place called Mt. Pyre, she proved that she had her priorities straight when she decided to go after the much more organized threat.

"This isn't over," Shelly hissed as she passed them, even though she was on her way out of the building. "We'll put an end to Team Magma, and then we'll move on to you. Your luck will run out someday."

And, giving a gesture of command, she and the other Team Aqua members were gone.

One of the weather scientists sighed in relief. "I'm not entirely sure what they wanted, but thank you for saving our research. In return, I would like you to take this Pokémon."

He offered Brendan a ball, out of which burst a small gray Pokémon that kind of looked like a gray cloud wearing a superhero mask. Brendan looked at it, then over at May.

"It seems more like one of your types," he decided. "You should take it."

"Really?" May didn't look much like she wanted another new Pokémon so soon, but Brendan was insistent.

"It's small and cute and looks Contest-ready. I'm sure you can get a few ribbons in another category."

The Pokémon was cute. There was nothing wrong with it. But May didn't want it for herself. Instead, she accepted the gift with a much better plan in mind.

Once the Pokémon, Castform as they called it, was secure with her other Pokémon, they said goodbye and left the Weather Institute behind, not looking back.

"So," May said, looking down at her Pokémon. "I have a full team. You don't. Do you have any plans for filling up those empty spots?"

"No," Brendan answered immediately. "But trust me, I'll know them when I see them. And since you have a legendary, I'm thinking of chasing down Heatran. Having a volcano god...goddess..." He stopped to see if the ancient Sinnoh volcano spirits came to give him advice, but didn't receive any. Didn't anyone who encountered it get close enough to check if it was male or female? "Having a volcano _deity_ on our side should be fun."

"Brendan," May started, her tone setting him up for disappointment, "I like you, but you are the last person in the world I would trust to handle a legendary Pokémon responsibly. If I had to choose between my first publication-bound work and stopping you from catching a legendary...well, chances are that the book was only in its first draft anyway. You," she poked him in the chest for emphasis, "are _not_ tracking down Heatran."

Brendan just faked innocence again. She was really starting to hate that.


	21. The Kecleon Apocalypse

**Thank goodness for random helpful people who will in no way be important later on.**

"Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy. But I really need you to babysit my dad."

The two had made it to the Pokémon Center in Fortree City, and May was currently giving the Castform what she said was a very important mission. Castform looked upset at the idea, but Brendan, Adam and Jerry all remembered Professor Birch too clearly. It wasn't an unreasonable request at all.

"I would have sent Latias," she continued as Brendan and the Pokémon watched. "We all know he needs something with a decent amount of power to keep him out of danger when doing fieldwork. But I don't want Latias in the hands of Team Magma or Team Aqua, and if she's protecting Dad, no one will be protecting her. You can not only keep the lesser threats away, but you can help him out by using your weather-changing moves to see how certain Pokémon react."

Castform couldn't think of a protest, so she returned to her ball and was quickly sent to Professor Birch.

"I hope he likes her," May said quietly. "I took her so he could have a research partner, but what if it doesn't work out?"

"She'll be fine," Brendan promised. "Your dad loves all kinds of Pokémon, and I don't think you can find a Castform around Littleroot Town. I'm more worried about my next badge. The Gym Leader here uses Grass-types, right? Since everybody lives in trees?"

"Flying," May corrected, apparently agreeing that the professor and Castform would take care of each other. "Her name is Winona, and she uses Flying-types. You might want to borrow Pikachu again."

And there went Brendan's promise to only use his own Pokémon from now on. At least May was a willing participant in the regular trades.

* * *

It took them a while to find the Gym. Everyone lived in the trees here, and they had to climb onto other people's property in order to continue. Brendan got a front-row seat to May complaints about how stupid it was to put houses in trees ("Don't they know that one big storm could wipe out the entire town?") but she'd gotten used to the stupidity of her home region during their travels, and eventually ran out of steam.

That didn't mean she liked it, but that she was filing all her complaints away for when Team Breakneck took over Hoenn and she actually had the authority to demand that things change.

Climbing down the ladder that would take them to the Gym, Brendan made his way to the door with more confidence than he should have. That overconfidence was rewarded by walking right into something that wasn't seen.

"May?" he called uncertainly, and her head poked over his shoulder moments later. "Fortree City isn't haunted, is it?"

"Not by ghosts," May answered, but she was giving the invisible creature a look that spelled out her silent fury. "But if something set up camp here, we can let it be for now. Let's go see if Steven's still around. We can make him do it."

As he turned, this time following May instead of leading her, he could have sworn he heard a chuckle that didn't sound quite human. Turning back to look, Brendan still saw nothing.

Determined to have the last laugh, Brendan focused entirely on the point where his obstacle had been, and slowly dragged a finger across his throat.

This time, there was no sound, but he could feel the disappointment rolling off his friend as she looked out over the edge of some unfortunate house's front 'yard.'

"Don't taunt invisible monsters, Brendan." She sighed, emphasizing that very disappointed feeling Brendan had noticed. "That shouldn't even be something I had to tell you, and yet here we are."

* * *

"How did I know we'd find you here?"

Steven Stone, obviously, was standing on a bridge just past a thick patch of annoyingly high grass, and he was even less surprised than May at the meeting. He must have been waiting for them.

"Hello," he said with a smile that promised doom. "Just the kids I was hoping to see."

"Did you finish your thing in Fortree City?" May asked, not at all distracted by Steven's presence this time. She was definitely enjoying it, but she seemed to be less overwhelmed now.

"Sort of," Steven said, a little embarrassed by something but not enough to explain what it was. "The Gym Leader doesn't need it my help, she has Pokémon that can use Fly to take her home. She just wanted me to figure out what had decided to camp out in front of her Gym."

"So she got you to do it?" Brendan asked. "How did she know you'd help?"

"Winona and I have been friends for years," Steven answered, fidgeting a little with something unrecognizable. "I don't doubt Wattson could have come up with a solution, and he's closer...but as he and Wallace both have very busy schedules, Winona called for me, instead. So I decided to help out, in exchange for watching her battle against her next challengers."

"Challenger," May corrected softly. "Singular. I'm here for story inspiration that doesn't come from my weird dreams."

"What is that thing, anyway?" Brendan reached out to touch the device in Steven's hand, but Steven pulled it away. Brendan pretended to be offended. "Come on, dude, you didn't have a problem handing me a Key Stone."

"The Key Stones aren't powerful on their own," Steven pointed out. "And trusting you with Mega Evolution is not the same as trusting you with the Devon Scope."

So it was called the Devon Scope. "What does it do?" May asked, leaning over it herself.

Just because he wasn't going to let them touch it, it didn't leave out giving a demonstration. "I could tell you," he said, "but showing you would be more fun. Are you ready for battle?"

They didn't like the sound of that, but they figured that no matter how it went, Brendan would either have a new Pokémon or more experience for going up against Winona.

* * *

The Kecleon, though interesting, didn't give Brendan that feeling that made him decide to catch something. And, not wanting Aron to end up evolving and breaking through the bridge, he ended up using Spoink.

THAT was certainly an experience.

It wasn't that Spoink wasn't interested in battle, it was getting him motivated that was the hard part. Brendan had discovered that on one of the many practice battles that he'd ended up in. But he'd learned very quickly that his little piggy liked _stuff._

He'd also learned, with a great deal of amusement, that a large chunk of Spoink's favorite stuff was either shiny or edible. So Brendan, being the practical guy he was, had asked his mother for edible glitter and sprinkled it on Pokeblocks May made for his team as a tasty, sparkly bribe.

The Kecleon had eaten the Pokeblock right in front of its opponent. Spoink had retaliated, and ended the battle in one hit, by throwing it off the bridge with a wave of psychic energy. The Kecleon had landed with a splash, and May had to give him another Pokeblock for the trouble.

"I haven't seen that style of battle before," Steven commented once the unfortunate Pokémon's green head had surfaced in the water below. "You do know Winona's field is more adapted to Flying-types, and that they are used to being airborne?"

"I'm not stupid," Brendan protested. "No matter what you think."

"I was trying to make a joke. I see now that it may have been just slightly offensive. I'm sorry."

Brendan didn't say anything. Fortunately, May stepped in.

"So you wanted to follow us to Winona's Gym?"

"If you don't mind. I'd like to see Brendan actually battle, if he would allow it."

May looked down at the water where Kecleon had splashed. It was surprisingly still now. "We have to make a pit stop first. I might not be earning badges myself, but we're a team. And right now, my team leader needs an Electric-type."

* * *

May had offered to take Adam in exchange for Jerry. Brendan had refused, putting all his faith in Pikachu instead. Steven, too, had heard about a Pikachu with an unusual battle technique, but he had promised not to tell Winona about it.

He'd been pretty interested when he'd heard that Brendan wanted to put the Pikachu in the magical girl costume, but he must have been sworn to secrecy from Winona's end, too, and didn't tell them why.

"I had an idea back on the island," he said, starting an entirely new conversation. "I wanted you to know that if Team Breakneck ever needs funding or secret passes in their mission to stop the other teams, just tell me the situation and I will gladly consider letting you use Devon's resources. I'm sure my father won't mind if it's for the safety of the whole Hoenn region."

"You're funding us?" May squeaked.

"On a case-by-case basis," Steven clarified. "I want Team Magma and Team Aqua stopped, but I only ever seem to get there too late. You two are getting caught up in the middle of everything, so I thought hard about this. It's the best decision I could have made, under the circumstances."

"So you're desperate," Brendan said, summarizing it all with absolutely no emotion.

"I'm desperate," Steven agreed.

Circumstances would later tell them all that it was the best decision Steven had made in his entire life, but that wouldn't be revealed for some time. Instead, he reminded Brendan and May that the family company's assistance was a case-by-case basis, and led them to the Gym once again.


	22. Fair Feathered Friends

**There is a very strong chance we ship Steven and Winona. With each other or other people, depending on the story.**

When Brendan was sure he had both his team and his strategy all planned out, he and his companions returned to the Fortree City Gym. Steven led the way this time, using the Devon Scope to scare away the Kecleon that had been in the way before, and let the kids go into the Gym first.

When he followed and the door had closed, Steven was the most surprised of all.

"Well," he said after a moment. "It looks like she's remodeled."

The Gym was a maze of large planks of wood, barrels of hay for nest materials, and revolving bars to act as doors. Sometimes one of the door's prongs were longer than the others, to catch it on something and force it to stop moving, forcing challengers to think.

"Do you have Latias with you?" Steven asked, and May nodded.

"I won't use her to let him cheat," she promised. "Besides, knowing Brendan, he's already making a plan." She glared at her companion. "Whether or not this plan involves demolition is up for debate."

Brendan faked innocence again, but there was something more to it this time. This time it was tinted with his complete pleasure that May understood him so well. "We don't need Latias," he promised the both of them, but the wheels in his head were already turning. "Are you coming with us, Steven?"

"Actually, I think I'll skip the puzzle." He released a Skarmory, who summoned a protective air bubble as soon as its trainer was on its back. "I'm not a challenger, so I'm allowed to cheat. I'll see you on the other side."

And Skarmory carried him away to where Winona waited, beyond their line of sight.

Once he was positive that they weren't coming back, Brendan looked at May, still with what she now realized was his scheme face. "Do you trust me?" he asked, and she had to give it serious consideration.

"Yes," she answered at long last. "Despite everything I know you're capable of, I trust you."

But Brendan wasn't done. "Are we friends?" he asked, and this time, May didn't even take a second to answer in the positive. " _Best_ friends?"

"Brendan, you are a single-minded criminal with dreams of world conquest. Short of people who are actually in jail, you're the worst influence ever. If I can point that out and not feel guilty for choosing those particular words, I would definitely say we are best friends."

"Good." He gestured to the revolving door that stood tauntingly in front of them. "Because we're going to cheat by crawling under there, and I'll be honest, my butt might end up in your face. I just wanted you to know that it wasn't on purpose ahead of time."

That had been exactly what she'd been expecting. "Don't you dare fart."

* * *

Winona had warm-up trainers to discourage that very trick. Not that it stopped Brendan from doing it anyway, or from dragging his newly-declared best friend along with him. He just made sure to beat those trainers in battle.

And with Aron finally evolving into Lairon, he was positive he was going to be victorious.

"Took her long enough," he said once Lairon was back inside her ball. "Do you think she was trying to hold on to being cute?"

"I don't think she really cares. It's more Aron biology keeping them from evolution until..." May waved her hands around, trying and failing to find proper words. "Something."

"Something, huh?" Brendan laughed. "You're better with written words than you are with spoken ones, aren't you?"

"I thought I'd already made that clear," May snapped back, ducking under one of the door rods. "I guess you're just not used to paying attention to people, are you?"

"I thought I'd made that clear." Brendan looked ahead, where he could see Steven and a woman that had to be Winona. They were talking and laughing about something, but they were too far away to hear it. There was only a short walk and a few more doors between them, so Brendan took the time to heal his team with the Hyper Potions and Leppa Berries he'd stocked up on.

"Pikachu's got Electro Ball," he said to himself. "And Steven seemed to like the idea of Draining Kiss, so I'm assuming that's a good thing. And Lairon has Rock Slide, which is another good move for Flying-types. I'm going to lead with those two, and just hope for the best."

"And if not, you have Spoink." May held out her Pokeblock case. "And I've got his favorite bribes. We can't go wrong with that."

Brendan took her word for it, and ducked under the first of those last few doors.

* * *

Winona was young, looking like she was about Steven's age, and her hair was just as pale. She stopped Steven mid-word to take a look at her challenger, then turned back to the pretty man.

"You were right," she said, glancing back at Brendan and May. "They really don't look like much. I take it you're not lying about being an unstoppable force in battle, as well."

"Why would I lie?" Steven sat back in the stands as Winona took her place on the field. "I hope you know what you're up against. Both of you."

May scrambled up to take a seat next to him, sliding in the spot Winona had recently vacated. She looked up at Steven with that curious look that promised questions. "So, are you two related, dating, or just friends?"

"We're not related," Steven promised. "I can tell you that we are one of the remaining two."

"But you won't tell me directly," she realized.

"I fail to see how it's of any importance." Steven did have a mild interest in her questions, though. "I will be cheering for her, of course, though I will understand if Brendan wins."

"Same here," May said weakly, "except in reverse."

"I'm not putting my money on either," Steven continued.

"I'm just bad at making bets."

An annoyed glance from Winona silenced them both, and the Gym Leader and challenger each sent out their first Pokémon.

A Pikachu against a Swablu was the first choice. Of course, Brendan's first instinct was Electro Ball, and of course, Swablu went down in one hit.

"Not bad," Winona said to herself. "But the battle is just beginning. You're on, Tropius!" she called, and sent out her second choice.

Brendan looked into the audience, and caught May's eye. He mouthed a single word and had her burying her face in her hands, shoulders shaking. Even Winona had to smile a little.

Steven had missed it. "What was that?"

May peeked out from between her fingers. "He said, _Bananasaur_."

Steven coughed into his hand. Brendan, deciding that the time for jokes had passed, called Pikachu back. "Adam, do the thing!"

* * *

Adam's Blaze Kick had taken care of the Tropius and the Skarmory that had come after, and Pikachu had been called back out for the Pelipper. Now she was standing off against an Altaria, a Pokémon she had only ever seen in Lisia's ownership. She knew that this was not Ali, but she had never battled him, either. All she knew was that it was part Flying and part Dragon.

She also knew she had Draining Kiss, but there was one little problem.

"Altaria, use Earthquake!"

"Electro Ball!" Brendan called helplessly, and Pikachu launched her attack at the same time Altaria did. The Electro Ball hit first, wiping Altaria down to half her health, and the Earthquake left Pikachu at the last of her strength.

May was a better trainer than he'd thought, it seemed. He'd expected Pikachu to go down after one super-effective hit.

"Another Electro Ball," he commanded, deciding not to go for the Draining Kiss - it might have restored some of Pikachu's strength, and had the Fairy-type advantage, but an Electric attack got a power bonus just from being the same type as its user.

"Dragonbreath," Winona ordered, and, once more, the two attacks passed each other on the way to the target. The difference was, this time Pikachu managed to duck in time, and the Dragonbreath only touched the tip of her ear.

Altaria fell. Pikachu stood up, shaking a little, and wiped the dirt off her skirt.

Brendan had earned the Feather Badge, and both Steven and May were cheering.

"You've won it," Winona said as she handed it over, "but I'm still not sure if I should let you pass."

"You should," Steven cut in. "They're necessary for the salvation of all of Hoenn."

"They didn't solve my puzzle," Winona complained, but May gestured back toward the doors.

"If you look at it from a creative standpoint, we kind of did." She grinned and patted Brendan on the back. "There's more than one way to get things done, as my dad always says - usually before entering a Poochyena den, but it still applies. You didn't set strict rules."

Winona floundered for words, and Brendan took the opportunity to leave, badge in hand. When the kids were out of earshot, Steven took the opportunity to point a few things out.

"They stopped Team Aqua from getting their hands on the Devon Goods," he told her. "Then they stopped Team Magma from forcing a volcanic eruption, or whatever idiotic scheme Maxie thought was a good idea at the time. The girl was even trusted by Latias herself to be her trainer."

"So you're using your father's money to fund these kids?"

"Not entirely. I'm using my father's influence. If it comes to money, I will listen to their requests before I make a decision. I'm not a fool, Winona."

"Funny," she said, the corners of her mouth turning. "I seem to remember somebody asking a girl out with a _rock pun_ a few years back."

Oh, she was going to bring that up, was she? "I seem to remember getting a date out of it."

Winona clicked her tongue, but they'd been playing around like this since they had met. "You're very lucky you're pretty, Steven. They're children - this can't be a good idea."

"All ideas are good ideas."

"I'm sure that's what Team Aqua and Team Magma think."

She had him. She had him and she knew it. "Well," he said after a moment of thinking, "how much would you like to _bet_ on that? A Mega Stone? Your dignity? Your hand in marriage?"

Winona lightly smacked his shoulder, not taking him seriously. "If you're going to propose, do it properly. I've heard stories about how this turns out."

"So you're telling me to use a rock pun instead," Steven said with a stereotypical wise head bow, equally lacking in seriousness. "I'll think of one, I promise."

"Please don't."

"Too late. Bars are set."

Her little frustrated sound and half-hearted "Get out of my Gym" was the best response he could have hoped for.


	23. A Trip to Lilycove

**In which May actually completes her team, and the writers finally remember to add the little 'current teams' note at the end.**

The pair left Fortree City as soon as Pikachu and Breloom had been returned to their proper trainers. There was nothing left for them here, and Lilycove City was where Lisia had told them to meet.

And, it seemed, Norman had gotten the message through to Wally.

"I hear you're starting up some kind of evil team," Wally started, having called almost as soon as his friends had stepped into the tall, nose-picking grass that led to the Kecleon bridge. "Your dad said you wanted me to be your third."

"Well..." Brendan swallowed. "We had a Contest star join before you did. You can split the authority."

"Tell him it's not an evil team," May hissed, having heard those words in particular. "He might want to know that before he makes a decision."

"Who said it wasn't evil?" Brendan challenged. "I never did. I only said I wanted to take over Hoenn before Archie or Maxie, nothing about using it for my own purposes."

Wally laughed. "Good or evil," he decided, "I still want in. I won something off the big guy in Team Magma, and I want to put it to use."

"What did you win?" Brendan asked, knowing that May would like to know. Even if she was trapped in the really tall grass at the moment.

"You'll see," Wally said, taunting him already. "So, what's our team's goal?"

He'd gotten a lot of confidence since his uncle let him go on a journey. Brendan wondered how he was really holding up. "Team Breakneck has only one mission at the moment, and that is to stop Team Magma and Team Aqua at any cost. Lisia's orders are to use Ali to distract and confuse them into submission, since she swears she's no good in battle. Maybe you can be her partner in crime, like May is to me."

"So she uses her bird to distract them while I have Kirlia sneak up and take them out, ninja-style," Wally decided. "I can settle for that."

"No killing," Brendan warned. "I don't want to be on the news yet, and I don't think Steven would give out bail money for murderers, if you even get that option."

Wally made an offended sound. "I do what I want," he said, and switched off.

Brendan didn't take him seriously, but looked back at the grass as it rustled before spitting out May. She held a Great Ball in her hands and her eyes were lit up. She'd replaced Castform, that much was clear.

"Do you want to say hi to our new teammate?"

She was more excited than he could remember, more so than even after joining forces with Latias. It almost took him by surprise. "What is it?"

May released the Pokémon from the Great Ball. It was a large, white, fluffy thing, on four legs, with a dark scythe-shaped horn (or ear, he couldn't tell) growing out of one side of its head, and a matching knife tail. He hadn't encountered one before, but he'd heard of them.

"Aren't they endangered, or something?" He looked down at the Pokémon. The Absol stared back. "Don't you have to have a permit to catch an Absol?"

"They're not endangered," May said, shrugging. "Not anymore. And even if I do need a permit, my dad is Professor Birch. I can get one in two seconds."

"You have a point."

"And since when were you Mr. Legal Pants, anyway?"

"You have another point."

She was satisfied with that, and she bent down to ruffle her new Absol's head. "He's so cute, isn't he?" she asked, dropping the subject. "I named him Dusky."

"What?"

"Dusky," May repeated, and the Absol sat down in front of her. "Defined by a dictionary as 'lit as if by twilight.' Since he's a light-colored Dark-type and all, I thought it would be cute."

So _that's_ what she'd been reading the night before. "You read a dictionary?"

"Skimmed it," May clarified. "Only made it through the E's. It was boring. Don't ever do it."

Brendan looked down at the Absol, who didn't appear to mind his name. "Well," he finally decided, "if you want Dusky to come along with us outside of the ball, he should be prepared for walking."

"I was going to put him back!"

Brendan laughed a little. "Of course you were. Wouldn't want his pretty white fur to get dirty, would we?"

* * *

"Who puts up fences like this?"

May's outburst was right on cue. Maybe there was something to the best friend thing, they seemed to know each other well enough to become predictable. He had to step up his unpredictability game.

"I think it was to keep the lines to the Safari Zone in check," Brendan said, checking his Pokenav map. "It also has a connection to Mt. Pyre here. Dusky has a type advantage against Ghost Pokémon, it could get him used to battling with a trainer."

"But he's so _fluffy,"_ May objected. "I wanted him to be a Contest-exclusive partner."

"You caught him before we stopped Team Magma and Team Aqua. He's going to battle eventually."

May looked down at the Great Ball that held her new friend. Brendan was right. "Let's meet up with Lisia first," she decided. "She can tell me if he's good enough for Contests, and what kind of moves he knows. We'll need something with Surf to take us across to Mt. Pyre, anyway."

"We have Latias."

" _I_ have Latias," May reminded him. "You don't."

"But doesn't your best friend get free rides?"

May pretended to think. "Um...no. Not unless he behaves himself." She couldn't stop the smile, though she tried. "If you promise to let me go check out the Lilycove Contest Hall, I'll let you ride Latias with me to Mt. Pyre after. Sound good to you?"

Brendan grumbled under his breath, but had no choice. He may be the one leading the team, but for as long as May held their only legendary, she was the one who directed them.

Besides, if he was being honest with himself, he wanted to see Lisia again, too. It had been way too long.

They had no idea that they had just barely missed Team Aqua preparing to set out for Mt. Pyre themselves.

* * *

"Oh, there's another guy?"

Lisia had sketched out Team Breakneck uniforms, as promised. Brendan had to be impressed by her dedication, but May had told her that there was now another boy involved, on a mission of his own, and she hadn't gotten around to showing off the designs yet.

"His name's Wally," Brendan explained. "May supervised him catching his first Pokémon, and then we met him and his uncle in Mauville City and he declared himself my friendly rival."

"He says he had an encounter with Team Magma," May continued. "I didn't actually hear the story that well."

"All he said was that he won something off 'the big guy,'" Brendan finished. "I'm pretty sure he meant Tabitha."

Lisia returned to her drawings. "What does Wally look like?"

"Skinny," May said immediately, her eyebrows scrunching again, like she was trying to describe Wally as a fictional character. "And I don't just mean he isn't fat, I mean he doesn't have muscles, either. He's our age, though, so that should be expected. He's skinny, pale and mostly green."

Laura looked confused by the description, but Lisia, being a young teen herself, understood enough to roll with it. "Mostly green," she repeated, putting the pencil back to the paper. But she didn't start drawing yet, and looked up to search them for any hesitation. "Are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, you can still stop Team Magma and Team Aqua without starting your own team, right?"

"We can," Brendan agreed, sitting down and casually playing with his Key Stone. "But the whole point of Team Breakneck is supposed to put us in charge of Hoenn. Not entirely for the power, we'll let other people do the actual ruling, just that the bad guys have to get through us first."

"It's totally about the power," Lisia said bluntly. "You can't fool me." She looked back at the paper, and then her head snapped back up. "Are those _Key Stones?"_

Well, it certainly took her long enough. "Of course they are," Brendan said, stretching his arm in a way that showed it off even more. "I'm just waiting for my Lairon to evolve into Aggron. I already have the Aggronite ready."

Lisia's eyes were wide and almost too blue, and Brendan was grateful that she turned them on May. "Which Mega Stone do you have?"

May opened her mouth, then closed it. She wasn't sure she wanted Lisia to know about her legendary yet - it wasn't that she didn't trust her, she just didn't want Lisia to accidentally mention it to the press. "I was actually thinking about asking my dad if he can get me an Absolite," she decided, patting Dusky's ball. "I just feel that it would be better for Contests if my Mega Evolution was more...fluffy, than the option I have now."

For a second, it looked like Lisia was going to ask. But, she just turned to her Altaria with a smile. "Mega Absol is so pretty, isn't it?" she asked him, and he chirped in agreement. "Is your Absol a boy or a girl, May?"

"It's a boy," May said proudly. "His name is Dusky. Mega Absol isn't too pretty to look gender-neutral, is it?"

"He'll be fine," Lisia promised. "Ali here gets mistaken for a female all the time, but I know he's a boy. And I think I remember that Brendan's Aron was a girl, but Aggron is a pretty tough-looking Pokémon." She laughed. "Huh, even Chaz has a female Machoke. Maybe we should invite him to be part of Team Breakneck."

"Let's not," Brendan and May said together.

Lisia's laughter got louder. "I thought that was how teams were formed," she teased.

If she was that insistent, maybe they should invite Chaz. Then again, May hadn't beaten him in a Contest, and so she wasn't sure exactly how she felt about the guy.

"What do you have for our costumes?" Brendan asked, looking more at Ali than at Lisia. "If we're going to go around recruiting people, we might as well match, right?"

Lisia and Laura shared a look. "It might be easier if we actually took proper measurements, Brendan," the costumer decided. "Lisia and May are equal, for the moment at least, but if I'm going to be doing any kind of work for you, I'd prefer if I didn't have to guess."

Brendan wasn't a fan of the idea, and looked at the girls and Ali as if they could give him any assistance. May just smiled and waved.

"You'll be fine," Lisia said, so sure of herself that Brendan almost calmed. "She made my uncle's better costumes, and he turned out..." She trailed off, then wrinkled her nose. "Well, she's still working with the family."

"Your uncle, huh?" Brendan took a seat next to her. "So when are we going to meet him? He's got to know his student has become a master herself, right?" Lisia focused even more on her sketches, but Brendan saw her face turn a little pink. "All right, don't tell me. I can guess. Is he older or younger than whatever parent he's related to?"

"He's younger than Mom," Lisia stated, deciding this was good enough. "By a lot."

Huh. That was an interesting fact. "And how much older than you?"

"I'm not sure. More than ten years."

"Do you look more like your mom or your dad?"

Her lips turned up a little. "Mom," she repeated, almost as if there was an inside joke she was dying to let him in on but couldn't.

"And how close is the family resemblance there?"

The smile grew more mocking, but Lisia remained quiet. Ali made a soft Altaria call, as if warning Brendan that any further questions were best reserved for later.

He could handle that. He probably had enough to go on now. Besides, from the look on her face, May seemed to have known all along.

"So," he whispered as Lisia returned to her costume design, "who is the guy? I'm kind of curious after everything I've heard about him."

"We'll meet him eventually." May looked almost smug. "You should really pick up a Contest magazine or two. The relationship isn't exactly secret."

* * *

May hadn't wanted to enter the Contest, not even with Dusky as her partner. She swore it was because all of his moves were for different types, but something told Brendan she just wanted to explore Mt. Pyre. Something about using urban legends about Ghost-types for her inspiration. Brendan didn't really care at first.

But it was only when they came to the edge of the land, Mt. Pyre in the distance, that he realized that he was a little scared of going into a cemetery unsupervised.

May was skeptical. "You're afraid of ghosts?"

Brendan gave her a light shove. "No. I'm afraid of _zombies._ Ghosts are images of the deceased, zombies are the reanimated corpses that come back to feed on the flesh and brains of the living."

"I'm aware of the difference," May reassured him. "Zombies aren't real, you know. I thought that the boy who was more than willing to provoke the forest gods would have no problem with one little graveyard."

"The forest gods are different. They eat _souls,_ and I know mine is either sour or shriveled." He folded his hands behind his back and stared out at the island graveyard. "But my flesh is young and not too chewy, and my brain is cooking."

"Don't worry," May said with a taunting smile. "Dad always told me that boys' brains tended to give out at our age and come back in our mid to late teens. It's probably wrung out like a sponge and slowly reabsorbing stuff."

She said it like she knew what she was talking about, and that annoyed Brendan more than anything else. "And what did the professor say about girls?"

"Oh, that?" She shrugged. "He said my brain would work just fine, but my behavior would break, especially around cute boys. He was right about that, so why wouldn't he be right about you?"

It wasn't anything that the movies hadn't warned him about, and May was his best friend. She'd be his reason and he'd be her restraint. They'd work together to navigate the challenges of growing up, just like they were now working together to put a stop to not one but two criminal organizations.

Somehow, he couldn't shake the feeling that they'd done things backwards.

But it couldn't be helped. All that could be done now is allow May to let Latias out of the ball just long enough for her to carry them both across the water, and prepare for a cemetery adventure.

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam (male Blaziken) Breloom (male) Lairon (female) Spoink (male)_

 _May: Jerry (male Marshtomp) Masquerain (female) Pikachu (female) Torkoal (male) Latias, Dusky (male Absol)_

 _Professor Birch: Castform (female)_


	24. Poor Unfortunate Souls

**As a water-themed villain, Archie gave us no other choice. I'm going to give credit anyway.**

 **The song is a parody of "Poor Unfortunate Souls" from The Little Mermaid. The editor still doesn't think it's perfect, but when it comes to the song parts she never does. I think it's great. I hope you think the same.**

* * *

For a Pokémon graveyard supposedly infested with Ghost-types, the first floor of Mt. Pyre was actually pretty peaceful. Brendan knew, from hearing plenty of stories, that the higher up a visitor got, the more people challenged said visitor to a battle. There were no annoying challengers here, though. Just trainers grieving for their lost Pokémon.

Perhaps that was why May had sent Dusky out to investigate things. His sideways horn was always pointed at creatures that turned completely visible when his eyes met theirs, and though he didn't seem particularly happy when Brendan added a Shuppet to his collection **("Are you really willing to let that thing follow us? They like to get in trouble, it could get you and May _arrested!_ ")** it was only a minor complaint and he left the new team member alone.

But when he tried to lead them away from the established path of stairs, the entire thing went south.

"He's an Absol," May tried to point out. "They have really keen danger senses. Maybe he's leading us in the safer direction."

She didn't sound hopeful, and from the way Dusky looked over his shoulder at her, it was going to be just the opposite.

Brendan understood too well. "You're just making us save the rest of Hoenn from catastrophe, aren't you?"

Dusky made a soft Absol noise of agreement before rushing off as fast as four legs could carry him, stopping only when he realized the trainers were left behind. Making completely sure that their Pokémon were all at full strength, the kids stayed in step behind him.

After the dull lighting of the graveyard cave, the sun nearly blinded them both. But that wasn't important.

"I hear voices," Brendan said softly, "and I swear they're not in my head this time."

"If they are, you're projecting, and I don't know what scares me more." May slipped past him to peek around the corner. "It's no good, nothing but fog up here."

Dusky tapped his front paw against the ground impatiently, tilting his head toward the sound. It almost looked like he was pointing.

"Don't get your fur in a knot," Brendan grumbled. "Just keep lookout for any annoying Ghost-types, and leave this to the professionals and the legendary."

May exhaled through her teeth, but she let Brendan continue thinking that using Latias wasn't a last resort.

* * *

Reaching the top of Mt. Pyre was harder than it looked. Not only was there a fog so thick they mistook tombstones for people more than once, the Pokémon that lived there were relentless.

There were wild Pokémon out there, some not even Ghost-types. It did help Jerry finally evolve into Swampert, but it didn't change that May wished she'd sent Torkoal home instead of Castform, or at least let him learn Sunny Day.

"A Sunny Day or a Rain Dance would be better than this fog," she said when Brendan asked why. "It would be way less creepy then..."

They were close enough now to see the top, and the people who were standing there. May stopped talking, whatever she was about to say already forgotten. Brendan froze. Dusky and Jerry made brief, uncomfortable eye contact.

Team Aqua was there, and they were apparently on a mission.

"Don't we know you?" one grunt asked, looking them over uncertainly.

"You might," Brendan said, a lie working its way into his head. "We're friends of your boss. We helped him stop Team Magma once, and we came to ask if they'd put a stop to them yet."

"You just missed those land-loving freaks," another grunt said, apparently not noticing May's "meh" when Brendan said he was Archie's friend. "The boss is up ahead. You can go and pass."

"Thank you." Brendan was deliberately ignoring May's open-mouthed stare. He turned back to her and nodded. "Well? You've got the Water-type and the Dark-type. You should be the one asking Archie if we can help."

That's when it seemed to click. "Right." She nodded to her Pokémon. "Fall back, boys. We've got this."

Dusky and Jerry were both reluctant to do so, but they fell back and allowed their leader to move ahead. May kept her eyes trained on Archie, who seemed to be demanding something from a cowering old couple, but the grunts let her pass, not recognizing her from past encounters.

Team Aqua must have more members than Brendan had thought. Once they'd defeated the pirate team once and for all, he'd have to ask Archie for tips.

* * *

"For the last time," Archie was saying to the old couple. "Give me the Orb!"

"I don't like your tone," the old man dared to say. "Go and ask politely for the Orb, and we might give it to you."

"Can we please have the Orb?" May asked sweetly, and Archie turned, a brief moment of rage that they could practically feel.

He recovered quickly. "What are you two doing here? You missed Team Magma."

"So I guess it's still your turn to lose." Brendan pulled a ball from his belt, hoping that Breloom was ready to battle the Sharpedo he knew Archie had. "Step away from the Orb, Archie."

"And who can stop me?" Archie abandoned the Orb conversation, though, and he stepped closer to the kids. "I don't think you know the extent of Maxie's plans. We're just trying to stop him."

"But we live on the land," Brendan reminded him. "Expanding the ocean is good for Water-types, but what are you trying to accomplish for humans?"

"For humans?" Archie seemed concerned by something Brendan and May couldn't figure out. "I don't need to explain that part to you. We simply plan to slow down the human advancement and return the world to its beginnings."

"So you think you can fix that by drowning most of the human population?" May sounded just as revolted as Brendan felt. "I thought you were just a bunch of idiots with a bad idea, not a group of mass murderers."

"Hey, humans are capable of swimming!" Archie snapped back. "We just want to make the world a better place!"

"By killing everybody in Hoenn," Brendan finished.

They noticed it was a bad idea when the music started to play. Arhchie had maybe a three second head start on them, but when the kids figured out what was happening, they each got a feeling of dread comparable to a parent yelling their full name.

 _"I'll admit that you may find me kind of nasty.  
_ _They aren't kidding when they say I'm kind of strange  
_ _But you'll find that nowadays  
_ _Team Magma's got new ways  
_ _To force Hoenn to experience a change."_

"There's that," May admitted, leaning back from Archie's stare.

Archie went on, taking her reply as approval to continue.

 _"And I fortunately know a little secret  
_ _It's driving me and making me obsessed  
_ _And I know that you might laugh  
_ _But I use it on behalf  
_ _Of the miserable, lonely and depressed."_

"He's nuts," Brendan summarized. The girl and the elderly couple all agreed.

Archie bared his teeth, exposing just how sharp humans could get them. So he was a Sharpedo merman instead of the more traditional Relicanth or Gyarados.

 _"Poor, unfortunate souls  
_ _In pain, in need  
_ _From the lovely Milotic down to the common Tentacool  
_ _I want to help them  
_ _Yes, indeed_

 _"Those poor, unfortunate souls  
_ _So sad! So dry!  
_ _They look at me like they're saying  
_ _'Help us, Archie, will you please?'  
_ _So I help them  
_ _Or I try."_

They really should have expected something like this. He was, after all, more of a merman than a pirate, and in all of the animated movies they'd seen, merpeople loved music. It was a fact of life.

And Maxie had done it. Archie probably didn't want to be outdone.

 _"Yes, it's happened once or twice  
_ _I just couldn't pay the price  
_ _When I wanted to take something for my own  
_ _Yes, I may be a thief  
_ _But you kids must believe  
_ _It's for those poor, unfortunate souls!"_

This was just like with Maxie back at the volcano. The only difference is that if _this_ idiotic plan worked, it would be more than two or three towns in danger of death and destruction - it would be the entire region. So, when Archie asked "Do you understand?" the kids almost immediately decided on an answer.

"We understand that you need severe psychological help," May told him, keeping a straight face only because she focused on the possible destruction.

"Or a new brain," Brendan continued. "That decision's yours to make, just hand over the Orb and nobody gets hurt."

Archie didn't seem to be in the mood for commentary, or just 'handing anything over.' "Don't think I've forgotten Latias," he said instead, and noticed May's look of horror. "We haven't discussed what it was that Matt was after."

"We know what he was after," Brendan said, knowing that his friend hadn't found her voice. "It doesn't take a genius. You wanted a legendary Pokémon and her Mega Stone."

"The Mega Stone was a loss," Archie confessed, "but we won't miss it. It was only for practice with the orb."

Brendan looked back at the old couple, noticing the Orb for the first time. "You wanted the orb? What does it do?"

That just set Archie back into Song Mode. Brendan looked everywhere but at May, feeling her eyes burning a hole through his courage.

 _"I can tell that you all think I'm crazy  
_ _That this entire mission is a bore  
_ _But you'll see it's much preferred  
_ _If you don't say another word  
_ _And all our issues in the past will be ignored_

 _"You lucked out and beat all of my grunts the last time  
_ _I know that you thought that you could forget  
_ _But I fear you've been misled  
_ _Archie's down but never dead  
_ _And we all said a lot of things that you'll regret!_

 _"Come on you poor unfortunate souls!  
_ _Go ahead! The choice is yours!  
_ _I'm a very busy man you see, I haven't got all day  
_ _You can't use it - it's just an Orb!"_

Brendan finally made eye contact with May. "At least he's almost done."

May's glare intensified.

 _"You poor, unfortunate souls  
_ _It's sad but true  
_ _If you want to stop Team Magma then you've got to pay the price  
_ _I'll even give you all the credit, kids, now wouldn't that be nice?"_

May rolled her eyes. _"Well, **someone** didn't think this through."_

But Archie was nearing the end, and didn't care.

 _"It's out of your control!  
_ _You poor unfortunate souls!"_

Brendan and May braced themselves for battle, but Archie simply passed between them with no problem. One look behind them toward the elderly couple and all was clear.

The Orb was gone.

* * *

"The Red Orb and Blue Orb aren't supposed to be separated," the old woman said as they all recovered from the incident. "And to think that the pirate man used the good name of music to provide a distraction as his grunts took it from us..."

"I just can't believe it worked," Brendan said, more upset with himself than even Team Aqua. "I used that same trick to get the Meteorite without Courtney noticing. I should have seen it coming and stolen the Orb from you myself instead of just standing there like an idiot."

"You thought they were just idiots with an agenda," May reassured him. "How were we to know that they'd steal your ideas?"

The old woman looked back at the stand where they assumed the Orbs had been kept. "You two seemed to know him," she said quietly. "And you weren't surprised when he mentioned a Team Magma. Do you know what they plan to do with those Orbs?"

The kids didn't say anything. The old couple let their minds fill in the blanks.

"Team Magma left something behind," the woman said, deciding to end the awkward silence once and for all. "We don't know what to do with it, but maybe the two of you could figure something out."

She passed Brendan an item with the emblem of Team Magma. Brendan stared at it for a while, then made a note to make a good Team Breakneck symbol.

"We could use this," May agreed. "But what's with the Orbs, anyway? Aren't they just ancient artifacts? Shouldn't we put them in a museum somewhere instead of leaving them guarded only by two people?"

The woman looked at her husband. The old man stood back.

"It was a long time ago," he began, and the kids focused on his voice. "The two Pokémon that formed the Hoenn region - the red dragon of land and the blue whale of the sea - were at war. The world was engulfed in massive infernos and vicious storms. The Orbs were designed, some say by Arceus itself, to stop the madness."

"I thought Arceus was said to have shaped Sinnoh," May interrupted. "Not even created the world, in the original mythology anyway, just formed Sinnoh into the shape that's on a map. And even then, Arceus sightings are so rare they're not even sure it's a god instead of a regular legendary Pokémon."

"It doesn't matter where the Orbs came from," the man decided. "What matters is that it worked. Light poured from the Orbs and calmed the ancient Pokémon, and the monsters have not been seen since."

"So what if they actually planned to use those Orbs to stop the other's plan?"

There was no real reason why May said it. She and Brendan both knew exactly what the teams planned to do with it.

The man seemed to think the same thing. "If that is the case, young lady," he told her, "then it seems you didn't notice what was clearly a _villain_ song."

So our heroes left Mt. Pyre deep in thought, making plans to keep the fight going. Things had gotten serious, and it was looking more and more like they were the only ones to stop it.

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam, Breloom, Lairon, Spoink, Shuppet (female)_

 _May: Jerry (evolved into Swampert) Masquerain, Pikachu, Torkoal, Latias, Dusky_


	25. Heat of the Moment

**In which we use a game mechanic from the remakes that Brendan and May shouldn't have been able to use yet.**

It was Lisia that assigned them their next mission, over the Pokenav phone. She'd heard from Flannery that Team Magma had returned to the volcano area, and the Gym Leader had decided that Brendan and May were the best for the job.

"I thought she was getting somebody on that for us," May complained, though she really wasn't surprised at all. "She wanted them stopped more than we did at the time, shouldn't she want it more than we do now?"

"Apparently not," Lisia sighed. "Just go back to Lavaridge Town, there's no Gym Leader in Lilycove. Your journey won't end here."

Of course it wouldn't. That would be too good to be true. So, Brendan turned off the Pokenav and started thinking things through, making an outline in his head that didn't feel quite legal.

"Do you think Latias can carry us over that distance?"

May thought it over. "I guess she can. If we're careful about it and don't do anything stupid, like fly her into a parallel universe or something."

It spoke volumes about their adventure so far when he didn't even question it. "And can she drop us off at the volcano, or is there a designated drop-off in town areas that say 'only in front of Pokémon Centers,' like they do for Fly and Teleport?"

May just faked innocence. She wasn't quite as good at it as Brendan was. "I don't think they thought of the possibility of two trainers flying a Latias when they made those laws," she pointed out, hands behind her back and rocking peacefully. "You do love loopholes, right, Brendan?"

"More than anything," he agreed, and May's faked innocence faded into a maniacal grin.

It turned out, Latias could drop them off at the volcano. Team Magma's meteorite machine was still in place, but they found nothing up by the lava.

"So where do we go from here?" Brendan asked, looking around hopefully, as if they could find Courtney or Tabitha or Maxie and get them to explain what they were doing.

"It was Flannery that gave Team Breakneck the mission," May said, almost to herself, following Brendan's stare. "Maybe we should head down to Lavaridge Town and get the full report from her."

"It can't be worse than sitting around here and waiting to get caught in an eruption." Brendan carefully counted all five of his occupied Pokeballs, and was relieved when he remembered that May had six more. "What the heck. Let's do it."

* * *

They didn't make it far before the Team Magma emblem in Brendan's bag started acting up. It had apparently been jostled around enough for a button to get pressed, and it seemed to be a remote control.

The earth shook, and for a moment, they thought that they had triggered an eruption. Instead, a boulder opened up to reveal a secret entrance.

May stared at it as if trying to wrap her head around something. "Huh," she finally said. "I guess there is something to Secret Bases, after all."

Brendan was already making plans. "Ok, Songbird, listen up. We burst in, I karate-chop a guard in the neck, you do a backflip through a window, and then we climb up into the air ducts, where we sneak through the building before dropping in Maxie's office for an ambush."

"Or," May pointed out, "we can just walk through the door, like this."

She stepped into the hole, and Brendan just rolled his eyes.

"Yeah, we _can,"_ he complained, following her in, "but that doesn't mean we _should."_

"And we _can_ go up against countless grunts, plus three leaders and a bunch of Pokémon, with nothing but whatever combat training twelve-year-olds can get, but that doesn't mean we _should_." She gave him a pointed look, and he deflated like a popped balloon. "Does it, Brendan?"

"I guess not." He took the lead, dragging his feet a little bit, but didn't complain any more.

The Team Magma hideout wasn't really a hideout, at least as far as Brendan and May could see. It was actually more like the Fiery Path than anything, complete with the heat that could boil water on the ground. The kids weren't going to beg for protection right at this moment, and they continued on their way. Latias was used to move the boulders in the way instead of Strength, and they followed the straight path until they ran into a Team Magma grunt.

"You're not allowed here!" he barked at them, but they hadn't come by invitation. They could have figured that out on their own.

"We have reasons," Brendan tried to explain. "We're kids, we just want to play."

"The past says otherwise," the grunt pointed out, and they were allowed to share a smug look before he pulled out his own Pokémon.

Brendan eyed the Poochyena carefully, then called Adam out. "Double Kick."

And that was the end of that.

* * *

They first noticed the speaker system shortly after their second battle. How Maxie got it to work without it melting was a mystery, but they lost interest quickly. He was, after all, dressed like a mad scientist. Why shouldn't he actually be one?

It was what Maxie was saying over the speakers that caught their attention.

"In case you haven't noticed," he said, as bitter as if he had noticed that there were intruders in his Secret Base, "we've lost to children and to Team Aqua too many times. This is an unfortunate series of coincidences - first those two at the volcano, then Matt of Team Aqua met up with Courtney...that wasn't fun to explain to the rangers...and Tabitha's encounter with the green-haired Kirlia boy. So I've called for desperate measures. I'll be honest with you, we're throwing plans at the wall to see what sticks. We have one of these 'stuck' plans in action and one in reserves, so Team Aqua can go and-"

"Sir," said a calm, female voice, as if the speaker didn't really care but was being paid to keep Maxie focused. "The Orb?"

Maxie backtracked immediately. "Well, I'll let you finish that thought. I have an Orb to activate. Are you ready, Courtney?"

"Of course," the female voice agreed.

"Good. You and Tabitha come with me, I want to make sure this gets done with no outside interruptions."

The microphone turned off. Brendan and May didn't know what Team Magma was doing, but they planned to find out.

* * *

They got lost a few times in this investigation. They were challenged to battle even more often, but strangely, none of the grunts dared to disturb any of the three people important enough to actually have names the intruders actually recognized. Maxie must have demanded only Courtney and Tabitha be there, under strict punishment.

That or he thought the grunts were good enough to stop intruders, but they honestly believed that Maxie was capable of learning from his mistakes.

The most worrisome thing they heard was when at least four grunts mention the legendary Groudon by name.

"You're familiar with Groudon, right?" Brendan asked as he ducked to the side to avoid another grunt. "From your research and everything?"

"I've read a few things," May admitted. "You know how I mentioned that Heatran was worshiped as ancient Sinnoh's volcano deity?"

"Yeah."

"Groudon was Hoenn's." May's eyebrows scrunched again as she worked out the details in her head. "But that's not everything. When I was on my mythology kick, I was more interested in Hoenn's than anything else. I still have an entire notebook on it back home."

"Of course you do."

May ignored him. "The problem is that Groudon not only controlled the volcanoes, it was said to have created the land we live on. Even if it actually is just a myth to make it seem like an actual god, Team Magma probably wants to test that theory."

Oh. So Maxie actually _was_ as dumb as he looked. Or maybe it was just a side effect of the natural heat of wearing a coat and old-timey full-body underwear around boiling lava.

The rest of their adventure continued in the same way, until they finally came to see Tabitha, waiting for them with a Pokeball in his hand.

"I was wondering when we'd run into you two again," he said, and the fact that he smiled as he said it unnerved both of them. "I was starting to think you were having your friends do all the dirty work for you."

"Wally acted on his own," Brendan clarified. "And Team Aqua hates us as much as you do."

"Then it seems like they've got one thing right."

With no more waiting, Tabitha threw the ball. The Pokémon inside it was a Numel, and Brendan had already had just about all he could take of those things.

"May, do the thing!"

"What?" May looked again at the Numel, then processed what he was saying. "Oh, fine. Jerry, take the stage!"

* * *

Jerry made defeating Tabitha all too easy. Finding Maxie was even easier.

Recognizing the giant, dormant Pokémon that neither had ever seen before was the easiest of all.

Maxie didn't see them, instead speaking only to the Pokémon. "You were waiting for the Blue Orb, weren't you? That's why all previous attempts to wake you failed."

"Tell me he's not," Brendan said quietly.

"He is," May whispered back, sounding more like a disappointed mother than the scared child she should have been. "He is."

A strong blue glow started from the orb in Maxie's hands, and the giant Pokémon that had to be Groudon slowly opened its eyes and started toward them. Then, with a loud roar and a splash of lava that barely missed them, it shot itself out of the volcano.

This was definitely not what Maxie had expected, as he had to stop himself from running right into the lava after it. "What's wrong?" he shouted up at the hole. "Wasn't the Blue Orb the key? The Red Orb would have been too obvious, I had to -"

Brendan's hand loudly connected with his forehead, and the sound distracted Maxie from his failed evildoing. Before he could get a word out, though, May waved a hand at the pool of lava.

"You really _did_ just throw evil plans at a wall to see what stuck, didn't you?" she dared to ask.

Maxie was not amused. "You two," he said through his teeth. "I remember you. You ruined our plans before, with the meteorite. Were you behind this, too?"

"Yeah," Brendan said sarcastically, hoping Maxie was smart enough to pick up on it. "Because two kids barely old enough for a Pokedex journey could totally control Groudon without use of a Pokeball of any kind."

"Don't make his brain explode," May grumped, but her friend's smile and Maxie's glare weren't quite making her as pleased with herself as they usually would.

"You seem to think you're funny," Maxie said, and May hummed indifferently. "I can assure you, you're not."

May caught his hand's movement toward his belt, where his Pokeballs were kept, and grabbed the first one she could find. Torkoal was not the first choice she would have made, but she knew that Jerry and Latias alone would be enough and she hadn't actually used him in battle recently.

It couldn't hurt. "Torkoal, take the stage!"

* * *

Torkoal had fallen after getting rid of the Mightyena, but May had expected that from a Pokémon she'd caught for Contest and appearance reasons. Jerry had been called out to replace him, and Maxie had expected that.

It didn't do a thing to save his Camerupt from a furious Swampert, but at least the preparation had let him get a hit in. The Crobat was defeated by Pikachu, who looked more irritated with the possibility of her pretty pink skirt getting singed by stray lava than the battle.

Maxie held Crobat's ball in his hand, frowning. "How?" he said to the Pokémon inside. "How can a little girl defeat us? Multiple times, even?"

"A full party and a type advantage," May answered. "Basic battling 101."

"You don't even know what 101 means."

"No," May admitted, "but they use it a lot in movies."

Brendan made a sound that was somewhere between a laugh and a sneeze. When he had Maxie's attention again, he took his turn to point at the lava. "You do know that when you were wasting your time battling May, you missed your chance to put Groudon under your control?"

"I knew that," Maxie snapped, in a way that suggested he really hadn't. "I'm going to go after Groudon. You two are going to go home. You can take care of yourselves in battle, but I doubt you can handle what's coming next."

He headed to the exit, and he didn't seem to mind when Brendan and May followed him out.


	26. A Pirate's Life

**We were inspired by Portal 2 for Archie's speaker message. It doesn't hurt the story at all.**

 **Related to the above, I have had it pointed out to me that Shivermetimbersshipping is a _pirate ship._**

They had barely made it down the rest of the mountain when they got a call on May's Pokenav from Steven.

"I know it's short notice," he said when she'd answered, "but it's urgent. I need you to come to Slateport City."

"Do we have a choice?" Brendan asked, and they heard Steven laugh.

"Absolutely not," he replied, giving them both the feeling that he enjoyed bossing them around. "I'll clean up around Lavaridge, you go and see what's up around -"

"We already cleaned up the volcano!" May whined. "Maxie released _Groudon_ , I think that's more important than whatever it is you're sending us to."

Steven went quiet. "Groudon?" he said after a moment. "Don't worry, I'll take care of that, too. Think of it as equivalent exchange."

He signed off before they could form a proper objection. May reached out to stroke Latias on the head. "Do you think he's even capable of taking care of Groudon?"

"No," Brendan answered immediately. His Key Stone suddenly felt heavy around his wrist. "I think that's going to be up to us, too. But as long as we have no choice, I say we just go for it."

May climbed onto her legendary's back, and when she felt Brendan's breath on her neck, she gave the command. "To Slateport City, and make it fast."

* * *

The crowd was gathered in front of a normal-looking building this time, and none of them were in pirate costumes. Captain Stern was giving a conference, apparently. This had nothing to do with Brendan and May.

At least it wouldn't have, if Stern hadn't recognized them from when they delivered the Devon Goods. Then they kind of got dragged into it.

"Is this why Steven sent us?" Brendan asked the captain, after explaining that they had no idea what they were doing here.

"I wouldn't doubt that," Stern replied. "We made a huge discovery on our last mission, and if you two hadn't kept the Goods safe, we never would have done it."

The air was suddenly filled with dark laughter, and a voice that Brendan and May recognized at once.

"Captain Stern, I presume?"

"Not him," May whispered in fear. "Please, _please_ not him..."

But, of course, it was no use. Archie's voice was even more recognizable than Maxie's.

"You turned your back at the wrong moment," he continued, and Brendan started to move into the dock building before May managed to stop him. "We of Team Aqua will take control of your submarine! Your objections are meaningless! Resistance is futile! We expect total cooperation!"

Brendan looked back at May, furious. "Can we smash him now?"

May let go of his arm without saying a word, and together they followed the terrified captain into the dock building.

Archie was standing on the dock, a megaphone in his hand, talking to a few Team Aqua members. Then, slowly, they all climbed into the submarine waiting for them.

Archie was last to vanish, and he gave the kids a cocky smile. "Somehow, I knew I'd find you here." His stare settled on Brendan, and Brendan made a fist. "Don't try it, kid. We're too far ahead of you now. Go home and play with your Pokémon, the big kids have their own little games to play."

"The big kids _suck_ ," Brendan insisted. "You're going to flood the world, Maxie's going to, I don't know, bring its core to the surface or something, and neither of you are going to do a _darn_ thing except cause a lot of unnecessary death and destruction! I could think up a better evil plan in my sleep!"

"I don't doubt he could," May added, triggering the captain's concern.

Not Archie's. "I would say that I'd like to see you try," he told them, "but if we're being honest, I'm tired of dealing with you. Goodbye, kids. With any luck, forever."

Archie jumped into the submarine, closed the top, and apparently, gave the command. Captain Stern made a sound of distress, but it was too late.

* * *

After only an hour of consideration, talking to the captain about it despite Brendan's objections, they came to the conclusion that there was nothing they could do. Apologizing all the while, they decided to take Latias back to Lilycove City. They landed in front of the Pokémon Center this time, and Brendan called the professor at once.

Castform answered the call, looking happier than she'd been when May had received her. May practically pushed Brendan aside in order to speak to her.

"Hi, Castform!" Castform chirped a greeting back. "Dad hasn't gotten in too much trouble, has he?"

Castform made a happy sound as the professor returned. Brendan shoved May right back so he could do what he called to do.

"I need a Pokémon that can hold two," he told him, "and it needs to know Surf."

Birch understood. "Heading to Mossdeep City, are you?"

"We were planning on it." Brendan accepted the offer of a Wailord, but his mind was elsewhere. "What can you tell me about the Gym Leader there?"

The professor wasn't sure how to say it, but he eventually found the words. "There are two Gym Leaders," he told them. "A brother and sister, twins - not much older than you, if I heard right."

So Brendan didn't know which sibling he'd face. He could deal with that, under the proper circumstances. "So what type do they use? Does the boy use one type and the girl use another?"

"They're both Psychic users," Birch answered, taking a moment to shoo Castform away from an Oddish before her alternating Rain Dance and Sunny Day could confuse it. "I'm not sure if they have psychic powers themselves or if they rehearse it all, but they have expertly trained Pokémon. Do you have a counter to Psychic Pokémon?"

"I have a Shuppet," Brendan suggested hopefully. "Maybe I can train with only her and not do anything with the rest of my team until she evolves."

"That wouldn't be a good idea," Birch replied. "You need to train her _properly_. I'm sure May could lend you one of hers."

"Dusky isn't trained for Gym battles yet," May started, but Birch had to end the call so he and Castform could chase down a Mightyena.

Brendan hung up and held Wailord's ball carefully. For such a large Pokémon, it was barely heavier than a regular Pokeball. "We'll train on the way to Mossdeep," he decided. "My Shuppet, your Absol. The twins won't stand a chance."

"An all-water route," May reminded him. "We might run into Team Aqua."

"Then let's release Shuppet and Dusky on them. It wont be hard."

* * *

They had only just started their journey from Lilycove to Mossdeep when they saw it. It wasn't even well-hidden, like Team Magma's hideout was. Not only was there a Team Aqua grunt attempting to train Wailmer to do tricks, the actual hideout was just a cave with an opening directly in the water. All they had to do was steer the Wailord into the hole.

The hole was big enough to fit a WAILORD. If there had been any doubt that Archie was an idiot in the first place, they would have quickly been put to rest. As it was, Brendan and May had no doubts.

"So how do you want to handle this place, Agent Sneakers?" May asked calmly, as if she were writing out a spy novel in her head based on their adventures in the hideouts. "You don't want to karate-chop a guy in the neck here, do you?"

"No." Brendan hopped off the Wailord when he managed to dock it like a boat. "I'm thinking we should just tell them we're interested in joining. Putting aside our mutual hatred to stop Maxie and all that."

"We could have used that on Maxie, too."

"No, we couldn't." Brendan looked around. "We were too late to stop Maxie from activating the Blue Orb and making Groudon angry, but we have time to swipe the Red Orb from Archie before he activates it."

May laughed. "I never would have thought you were that willing to be a good influence."

"I'm not." Brendan had to smile a little, though. "I just think a little bit of underhanded justice is what this calls for."

"You're probably right." May looked back at the entrance, then ducked to avoid a patrolling grunt. "So, are you thinking theft or vandalism?"

"Why not both? We've got time."

* * *

The maze of teleporter pads easily made the biggest challenge. Team Magma didn't have them littering the halls of their hideout, and it was pretty hard to remember which one they took last.

"We can't even drop things on them like in Hansel and Gretel," May complained. "Shelly has to be smarter than Tabitha, it's the only explanation that fits."

"That, or Archie thought they were fun." Brendan quietly opened a Pokeball, and when Shuppet made her appearance, he pointed at a wall. "Go and figure out which one we're supposed to take," he ordered. "Haunt the grunts if you have to. Haunt _Archie_ if you have to, just go and get us a map."

 **"I'm on it,"** Shuppet promised, and she faded into the shadows before they could blink.

"So we're waiting for her to come back?" May asked, and Brendan gestured at the teleport pads.

"Do you want to figure this out on our own?"

May mimed zipping her lips shut.

Shuppet was gone for a long time. By the time the tenth minute arrived, they were both hungry and had sent Dusky out as a guard dog. It was the Absol that jumped the highest when this speaker system turned on.

"Is this thing on?" Archie's voice asked uncertainly, and they heard Matt say something in the background and a bit of paper-shuffling. "Ok, good. So, it looks like we've got a lot of new recruits lined up, so let's take care of a few things. This is Archie speaking. I'm the captain around this ship. Since she's in charge of the hiring, you've probably already met my first mate, Shelly. She's the brains of the operation."

"That explains a lot," Brendan commented under his breath. May shushed him as Archie continued.

"I know what you're thinking, men, and I won't stand for it. She is married. To the ocean. If you get in the way of that, you're fired. And you all know Matt, our intimidation tactic..."

Dusky's tail twitched as Archie started going into Magma-mocking and actual boss stuff, but it was only Shuppet's return that the Absol had noticed. She was not, he realized, carrying a map.

 **"I couldn't take it with me,"** she explained. **"But my job is to get Brendan where he needs to go, just like yours is to protect May. We can do that with or without a physical map."** She floated ahead, hovering above a pad and gesturing down to it with her horn.

 **"You memorized it?"** Dusky asked, mildly impressed.

 **"I had a Plan B,"** Shuppet replied, moving her head in an uncaring gesture. **"Now move, we're going to get caught."**

* * *

With Shuppet to guide them, they made it through the worst of the maze of teleporters without being discovered. It was only when they reached the room that had to be Archie's office that they had a good reason to be afraid.

"I don't know what's worse," Brendan commented as he started digging through the papers in the desk drawers. "That they live in a cave, or that I just realized that 'Archie' could be short for Archibald."

"Honestly? The worst thing is that we're digging through a man's private documents to find out." Despite that, May didn't seem to care, and in fact was snooping through Archie's things in a hunt for the Red Orb. "Just be careful with the recording equipment on the desk."

Brendan pretended to ignore her, even as he avoided the microphone like a bottled dose of Seviper venom. "I'm going with the name thing. That is a Phineas and Ferb-level evil backstory."

May opened her mouth, perhaps to retaliate with "What's your excuse?" But it died on her lips as she triggered a secret switch, and Brendan's attention was drawn to the sound.

There were two sleeping Electrodes. One guarded a Nugget - _pirate treasure,_ May thought before she could stop herself. The other guarded a Master Ball.

Brendan saw it at the same time she did. "Dibs," he said as soon as he found his voice.

"No," May said at the same moment. "I know what people use these for, Brendan. Do you remember our conversation about you having a legendary?"

"I remember you saying I'm not allowed to chase down Heatran. Not that I can't have a legendary at all."

"Well, tough boogers. You still can't have it."

"That's not fair! I'm the captain of Team Breakneck's ship, so I get half the treasure the first mate finds!"

"And I'm the first mate in question, so I get to decide which half the captain gets." May crossed her arms over her chest. "You get the Nugget."

"But I called dibs!"

"And I said no!"

"Tough boogers!"

They didn't realize until it was too late that upsetting a pair of guardian Electrodes, while not as obviously dangerous to the mission as triggering the equipment, was still not the greatest move they'd made.

They dropped the pointless argument immediately, and each grabbed a ball.

"Lairon, do the thing!"

"Jerry, take the stage!"

* * *

May got the Master Ball in the end. Brendan tried not to let his disappointment show.

Maybe he wouldn't have minded so much if May didn't have a legendary already, or if she hadn't told him that she was taking it just so he couldn't. Or maybe he would have, he wasn't sure.

And the worst part? He _still_ liked spending time with her afterward.

"I'm thinking we make them swear their allegiance to Team Breakneck after their final defeat," he was saying, as they once again followed Shuppet through the teleporter maze. "Maybe on threat of decapitation, I haven't figured that out yet."

"Like I'd let you cut someone's head off," May retaliated, just as he knew she would. "It's way too messy, I don't want to be on cleanup duty. Blackmail is a crime I can get behind. I'm sure we can find something on these freaks."

"Freaks, are we?"

The kids stopped what they were doing and nervously looked up, into Matt's terrifying eyes. May let out a nervous laugh.

"I totally meant that in a good way," she tried to lie, but Matt wasn't quite dumb enough to buy it.

"We all expected to find you here," Matt said instead, deciding to pretend she hadn't said anything. "Archie had the grunts on patrol specifically for the two of you."

"And we avoided most of them," Brendan added. "You need to hire better people."

"And it was my idea to install the teleporters," Matt continued, speaking over Brendan as well. "Did you get stuck on those?"

"A little. We figured it out." Brendan looked past the bulking frame of his adversary, trying to squint into the water. He could barely make out a shadow under the surface. "What's under there? Did Shelly put in a Sharpedo tank?"

Matt looked over his shoulder, then pushed Brendan away. "Whatever Archie and Shelly are doing in there is none of your business," he snapped. "You have to deal with me first!"

Brendan felt every part of his body rise to the challenge. "Then let's go," he said through his teeth. "Breloom, do the thing!"

"Mightyena, you're on!"

* * *

The battle was fast and, on Brendan's end, mostly painless. Spoink even evolved into Grumpig in the battle against the Golbat.

Matt had only come after him with two Pokémon, and though he looked like he was reaching for his Sharpedo, he stopped and admitted defeat before Brendan could replace Grumpig with Breloom again.

"You're too late!" Matt cheered, fist-pumping the air. "Archie and Shelly are halfway gone! You can stay and finish our battle, but then..." his enormous muscles twitched, and he seemed to enjoy it when May made a disgusted face. "What difference would it make?"

"I'm going to punch this guy," Brendan hissed as Matt made his retreat. "In the face, with a brick."

"I'll set the brick on fire." May was, once again, right behind him in his insanity. He must have been a bad influence after all.

Which was a good thing, because May was a good influence on him. If he'd never met her, he might have just accepted defeat and let Team Aqua and Team Magma take each other out, watching the catastrophe with a feeling of grim satisfaction as he and his entire family either drowned or boiled to death in the baking sun.

But since he had met May, he just re-summoned Wailord and told it to take them to Mossdeep City, where he could battle the twins and prepare for the important rematches.

* * *

 _Pokémon teams:_

 _Brendan: Adam, Breloom, Lairon, Grumpig (evolved) Shuppet_

 _May: Jerry, Masquerain, Pikachu, Torkoal, Latias, Dusky_


	27. Prepare for Trouble

**EDITOR'S NOTE: "Let's just say that fandom Sims are addicting and can get in the way of a productive chapter, especially when the usual author has writer's block. On the bright side, Tate and Liza have the potential to be important characters...in the epilogue. Psychic powers are fun to write, and we've never written synchronized twins before. That said, we were more inspired by the anime than the games for this chapter."**

They slept on Wailord's back that night, Latias to keep them from falling, and when they woke up they found themselves on the beach of Mossdeep City, their 'boat' sleeping under them. Brendan called it back to its ball, and then they started searching for a Pokémon Center.

It was still too early in the day to find anyone willing to open their doors, but the Pokémon Center was always open. It was almost like the nurses never slept.

"They do," May said, before Brendan could even voice his theory that they were robots. "They all wear the same wigs and uniforms, so they all look alike."

"Even the guys?"

"The men work in secret, or treating serious, possibly fatal injuries. Not that women can't do the same thing, but they usually work directly with the trainers and healing basic scratches and non-serious status conditions." When Brendan stared blankly at her, she tapped the pocket where her idea notebook was hidden, letting him know she'd researched it. "Well, when was the last time a Pokémon Center had a male face?"

He didn't say anything. The nurse had returned with their Pokémon and a place for them to stay until a decent hour in the morning.

* * *

May woke up earlier than she'd intended, with what was almost a sixth sense of her own. Something big was going to happen. She didn't know if it was a good something or a bad one, but she knew that it was going to happen and that there was nothing she could do to stop it.

What if she made friends with the twins? Her dad did say that they were only a little older than she was. Thirteen or fourteen was within the usual age group.

Or, and this seemed much more likely, what if they wound up fighting against Team Magma or Team Aqua again?

Brendan, in contrast, was snoring loudly in the bed across the room. She contemplated using Masquerain to wake him like she had back when she was just a Surskit, but decided that while a friend would do that, a _best_ friend would assault him with a pillow.

So she did.

Brendan woke with a loud cry of "I didn't stab the cop with a banana!" but realized almost immediately after that May was not a police officer or lawyer.

"I wouldn't banana-stab the twins, if I were you," she commented as she retreated into the bathroom to brush her hair. "We want them to like us enough to give you a fair shot at the badge."

"I do what I want," Brendan snapped back, getting only a laugh in response.

"Well, you'd better want to get your next badge," she said through the closed door. "These kids might not have heard anything about the evil teams, and it's going to take all day to explain things."

He didn't doubt it would.

* * *

The Mossdeep City Gym was not a place that either would want to return to. It was worse than even Brawly's, with nothing but terror, confusion and warm-up trainers around every corner. But, eventually, they made it to the center of the maze, where, as promised, there were two young people standing in anticipation.

They were nearly identical, gender and a few unimportant features the only differences - even then, a challenger had to get up close to notice that one was a boy. And, of course, they launched right into a prepared speech.

"Prepare for trouble!" said the girl.

"And make it double," said the boy.

"You must be the challenger," the twins said together.

"I'm Liza," said the girl.

"I'm Tate," her brother added.

Then they returned to their synchronized act. "We're the Gym Leaders of Mossdeep City. Do you think you can defeat us in a double battle?"

Brendan felt the fear instantly increase. "Double battle? No one mentioned a double battle!"

"They didn't?" Tate broke away from the synchronization, but Liza didn't stop him. "I thought they had to warn challengers at the entrance."

"We don't really pay attention to the Gym greeters," May explained.

That cleared things up. "Norman's kid?" Liza asked.

"Yes," Brendan answered, and he wasn't surprised when the twins nodded as if making a plan through telepathy. "Are you real psychics?"

"In training," Tate answered cryptically.

"We've always been able to get a decent read on each other's thoughts," Liza clarified. "And we can extend it to picking up on the emotions of other people. But we can't do any cool tricks like seeing the future, reading minds or moving things with thoughts...but we're trying."

"And you're Professor Birch's daughter," Tate said, giving May a look that briefly triggered her interest in pretty guys. If he 'read' that, he didn't comment. "Your father called to warn us about the two of you, and the chaos that tends to follow. I assume you would like to be Brendan's battle partner?"

"That's allowed?"

"Of course." Liza seemed used to explaining this part, at least. "We wouldn't leave our challengers without options, if they have a travel partner."

Brendan looked hopefully at May. "I'm willing if you are."

"My first Gym battle." May considered, then smiled. "I'll do it. But I want a badge when this is over, too."

The twins both laughed. "That can be arranged," Tate promised. "Now, let's show you the full force of our combined abilities!"

* * *

Solrock and Lunatone, while perfect matches for twin Gym Leaders, were not Pokémon that May had expected to be particularly powerful. Unfortunately, Jerry had very limited Water-type attacks, and poor Shuppet was having a hard time despite the type advantage.

It was part experience, of course. May and Brendan had been double-battling together since the journey started, but Tate and Liza had probably been battling together since before they got their own Pokémon. She'd heard stories of kids using their parents' Pokémon to learn how to be proper trainers. And the fact that most of their commands and strategies were communicated almost exclusively by four-way telepathy, or whatever it was that the twins and their Pokémon actually used, was another contributing factor.

Still, it wouldn't be wise for her to not see that they were using more than just practice and secrecy, but some kind of strategy as well. They got to be Gym Leaders on their own, after all, not on family connections. And there was a reason they shared the title that did not boil down to "Twins are sometimes treated as one unit."

Brendan was trying and he had Norman's blood in his veins. Shuppet was just a relatively new catch, and he wasn't used to using her. Jerry was just wondering how a Solrock and Lunatone could possibly pose a threat.

"Shadow Ball on Solrock!" Brendan ordered, and Shuppet fired a ball of what seemed to be pure nightmares at her opponent.

"Then you use Muddy Water," May told Jerry. "On the Lunatone."

Lunatone got hit, and its Rock typing was enough to take it down permanently. Liza didn't call it back, instead letting it float off the field and watch Solrock with her.

 **"Should I go for the Flamethrower?"** Solrock asked its trainer. Tate, getting the general idea of the request, gave a barely-noticeable nod.

Solrock caught what he didn't say - "The Shuppet, if you needed a target suggestion."

The burst of fire came too fast for Shuppet to avoid. She took the whole hit, and lay at Brendan's feet as barely more than a charred pile of ghost. Liza cheered for her brother's victory, but Tate and May shared a look across the field.

Tate gestured to Jerry, accepting his defeat. "I know you want to."

"I do," May agreed. "But I don't. It isn't fair for both of you to lose to the same Pokémon."

"What are you doing?" Brendan complained. "Avenge me!"

Liza shook her head. "Ignore him. She's giving you an opening, Tate. Take it."

Tate waved his hand in May's direction. "She's giving me an opening because she knows her Swampert can take it." May smiled innocently. Tate wasn't fooled. "If you're not going to make a move, May..."

"Jerry, use Muddy Water!" Brendan called from off the battlefield, and Jerry was so used to obeying his orders on official Gym grounds that he didn't think twice. Once the Solrock joined the Lunatone in defeat, he processed what he'd done, and looked over his shoulder apologetically.

 **"Sorry, May,"** he said softly.

May sighed. "That's fine," she reassured him. "I was going to do it anyway. I was just waiting for Tate to make the first move."

"That explains it," Brendan said loudly, still annoyed. "He does look a lot like a girl, he must be 'pretty' enough to fit your type."

May gave him a look that could melt through steel. Liza toppled over, laughing hysterically. Tate turned such a bright red it would make a character in Lisia's anime jealous.

"I'll, uh..." he turned away, too late to hide his embarrassment. "I'll go and get your badges."

They heard him angrily stammering about looking feminine all the way to the back room. Liza watched him go, catching her breath but not fully getting over it.

"He'll be fine," she promised. "He's just starting to notice girls himself, he's not used to hearing he might fit someone's 'type.'"

* * *

Liza was the one that gave May the Mind Badge, as Tate was trying hard to avoid eye contact with either challenger. Brendan received his Mind Badge from Solrock, but Tate still gave the necessary speech in sync with his sister.

"That was a fun battle," they said, one to her opponents, the other to the floor. "Let these be a pass into the Pokémon League, and a source of happy memories."

"I'm not going for the League," May said sweetly, as she clipped the badge to the strap of her hip bag. "I'm just tagging along."

"I'm just doing it to shut people up," Brendan added.

"Whatever your reasons," Liza said, not bothered by either statement, "just keep us in mind if you ever need help, ok?"

There was something in her eyes that made Brendan wonder if this was volunteering herself and Tate for Team Breakneck, but he dismissed it. She was psychic, yes, but she wasn't trained enough to know _that_. Not without them directly telling her.

Before he could question the statement, May had said goodbye and started pulling him along. "We," she hissed in his ear, passing it off as a one-armed hug so only he could hear the quiet fury, "are going to have a nice long talk about the term _sore loser."_

Liza grinned and nudged her brother. "So, was she cute?"

Tate's response was that of any other thirteen-year-old boy asked the same question: "Meh."

Of course, like any other sibling, Liza refused to drop it. "I ship it," she declared, more to get a rise out of him than anything else.

"Don't."

"Too late. I call best woman at your wedding."

"Liza!"

She blinked innocently. "Yes, Tate?"

He didn't answer with words, but gave her a little push instead. "Don't," he repeated. "Please. Don't."

Liza shrugged. "It's your decision. I just like teasing you, that's all."

"Then drop the topic."

She thought about pointing out that he wasn't claiming that it wasn't possible, but the conversation had already gotten old. "I was thinking of using a different combination in later battles," she said instead. "Does a Gallade and Gardevoir combo sound like it could be a twin thing, or does it seem too much like a choice for a romantic couple?"


	28. Rocket Fuel Rodeo

**If Brendan hasn't thrown things into a volcano to see what happens, even he knows it's a bad idea.**

Their new badges safely put away, and Jerry and Shuppet freshly healed, Brendan and May decided to pay a visit to the Mossdeep Space Center before heading out to the final Gym city, Sootopolis. May wanted to know the probability of finding life on other planets, and Brendan was interested in rockets. It was a win-win situation.

They weren't the only ones with that idea. Almost as soon as they left the Pokémon Center, they met a familiar face, dressed entirely in a shade of red that matched his hair and surrounded by an army dressed in that same shade.

"This is starting to become a chore," Brendan complained, picking out Adam's ball. "Clean your room, sweep the floor, defeat an evil team bent on destroying the world, take out the trash..."

May disguised a laugh as a cough, but gestured to Team Magma. "They might hear you," she said, in a tone that implied she really couldn't care less.

"Good." Brendan started on his way, Adam still in his ball for the moment but kept tightly in his throwing hand. "Then it's time to cross this chore off our list for the day."

May's smile was almost as bright as Lisia's. "I love it when you say things like that," she told him, practically skipping along at his side. "It makes me feel like we're in a spy movie."

She clearly didn't consider Team Magma a threat anymore. She must have assumed Steven had taken care of Groudon like he'd promised. If only Brendan could have that kind of blind faith.

* * *

The Space Center was crawling with Team Magma grunts. The scientists, janitor, and visitors were all huddled in the corner, not even bothering to warn the new arrivals to stand down.

"We're here for the rocket fuel," a grunt said when May asked. "Our boss has plans for it."

"Moving you all to the moon, I hope," Brendan said, more to himself than to the grunt or even May. Then he unleashed his Breloom to sweep the floor with the grunt's Baltoy.

The grunt guarding the stairs wasn't any better. He was expecting to see them, and he was not happy about it.

"Four," he said softly. "FOUR kids getting in our way now. I thought that the Contest star would be a pushover in battle, but the brat caused some kind of distraction with that Altaria, walked right into our huddle, stole my buddy Jake's sandwich, diverted our speech from making land-expansion plans into a High School Musical sing-along, and danced out!"

Dancing Shadow. Lisia's codename was officially Dancing Shadow now. Brendan was sure he'd heard it from somewhere, but the story of her first unauthorized Team Breakneck mission was perfect for it. "I didn't tell her to do that," he said, trying not to laugh.

The grunt didn't seem to believe him.

"I don't believe you," he said, reaching for a ball. "But I'm here because Maxie said so, and I'm going to do what he told me to. Mightyena, go!"

Brendan reached for a ball of his own. "Adam, do the thing!"

As Brendan battled, May turned to the shocked citizens of Mossdeep City and gave them a reassuring smile. "Don't worry," she said, waving her hand dismissively. "We do this all the time."

"All the time?" a woman dared to ask. "Why?"

"Because," May answered bluntly, "we're the only ones who seem to care."

"But we care!" a scientist complained. "We just aren't that good at battling, our Pokémon are assistants in our jobs!"

"Then it sucks to be you, doesn't it?" May turned her head back to the battle. "Don't worry, Brendan's got this."

And even if he didn't, she had his back. That was the most important thing.

* * *

Adam had refused to go back in his ball after the battle. Brendan and May no longer cared. So, it was with a Blaziken trailing after them that they wandered right into an ambush, three Magma grunts to two kids.

"There's even MORE of us up ahead," one grunt taunted. "Maxie took precautions this time."

Adam felt his talons twitch into a fist, but he kept the urge to punch under control. **"You really think it's a good idea to pick on kids with a BLAZIKEN bodyguard?"**

The grunts didn't even acknowledge his presence. "Two against three. What do you think of that?"

Brendan nodded toward his first Pokémon, and stepped aside to allow Adam to take his place in front. "I think that it's still not enough to give you an even chance."

May called Jerry to the field, and the two starters shared a look of pure determination. When the three grunts all sent out a Pokémon, leaving Brendan and May outnumbered, Brendan sent in Grumpig to cover the gap.

Two minutes later, the kids were moving past the grunts, and the grunts were complaining loudly about their loss. In the back of the room, they found familiar faces. One was a scientist-looking guy with an obnoxious amount of red, another a heavy guy in a red hoodie, and the third was young and pretty, with silver hair and a fancy, impractical suit.

Steven saw them before Maxie did. "I was wondering when you'd be here," he said, his eyes flicking between them and Maxie. "You really are danger magnets, aren't you?"

"Troublesome infants," Maxie corrected, giving Brendan and May a disgusted look. "They don't know when to quit."

"Neither do you," Steven pointed out. "Releasing Groudon without a plan for stopping it wasn't enough for you, so now you're trying to steal rocket fuel? Calling them troublesome seems a little hypocritical, don't you think?"

"The rocket fuel plan is brilliant!" Maxie snapped. "We'll jettison the rocket fuel into Mt. Chimney. We don't need it anymore now that Groudon is gone. So we'll use the fuel's power to make the volcano erupt!"

Three people stared at him, all voices failing. Even Tabitha seemed surprised, as if he hadn't been told of the plans for the rocket fuel once they'd stolen it and had finally realized that his boss was insane and not to be trusted.

"That," Steven said after a moment, "is the dumbest thing I've ever heard."

"No it isn't! It's foolproof!"

May didn't even bother to try. "I've beaten this guy in every confrontation we had," she told Steven. "I can take him again."

"And what about him?" Steven gestured to Tabitha, still standing in stunned silence to the side.

"He's all yours, if you want him."

Steven laughed. "You are used to this, aren't you?" May rolled her eyes, the _You have no idea_ unsaid. "Fine, then. May, let's show them what they're dealing with and keep the rocket fuel out of their incapable hands."

* * *

Brendan and Adam didn't know why Maxie had expected a different outcome for this match. Maxie had a Camerupt, and May had a Swampert. Even the Crobat falling to Pikachu didn't seem to do much to stop his determination. But May had a better plan for the Mightyena, and had been saving it for this very occasion.

"Latias, take the stage!"

The look on Maxie's face was worth it. "Impossible," he whispered, his voice gone.

Tabitha made an incomprehensible noise, finally choking out, "She's got a _legendary_ on her side?" He turned to Maxie, fear on his face for the first time. "We have to get out of here, dude. There's no telling what that thing can do."

"But you'll miss all the fun!" May complained. "After all, you're very lucky right now. You get to be among the first to see Latias at her full power!" Latias turned her head back to her trainer, and May smiled back and raised her hand. "Latias, Mega Evolve!"

It was hard to tell if it was the energy from the stones, the psychic attack from Steven's Metang, or Tabitha's shout of creative profanity that shook the windows, but when the light cleared and Mega Latias stared her opponents down, you could almost hear the sound of Maxie's Mightyena wetting itself in terror.

May pointed directly at it. "Dragonbreath!" she commanded, and Mega Latias followed the order with no further delay.

"Metal Claw!" Steven commanded at the same time.

Both Maxie's Mightyena and Tabitha's Golbat crashed into a pile of Pokémon on the floor of the Space Center. Mega Latias returned to normal and high-fived Steven's Metang, before doing the same for her trainer.

Maxie looked almost furious. "If you think," he hissed at May and Steven, "for even one _fraction_ of a second...that you have ended it here..."

"I'd say we have," Steven said shortly. "This was pretty clearly grasping at straws."

"I know, right?" May gestured to the equipment behind her. "You try to force a volcano's eruption with a meteorite, only to let your musical gene influence you - by the way, I'd stick to singing in the shower if I were you, that's how my mom and I work." Maxie grunted, but didn't interrupt her. "Then you take the Blue Orb from Mt. Pyre, hoping that it would let you control Groudon, and instead you just make it angry. Then you try to _launch rocket fuel into said volcano_? I'm not a rocket scientist, but I _am_ a scientist's daughter and a research addict, and I can tell you that it would not have expanded the land mass at all and instead just wiped out Lavaridge and Fallarbor, maybe even Mauville." She crossed her arms over her chest and glared, looking almost like a tiny mother. "Any more brilliant ideas, Maxie?"

There was a moment of silence from Team Magma's leader as he comprehended the fact that a twelve-year-old girl had seen the fault in his plan where he couldn't. "I'm done," he said, keeping it short and to the point. There was some kind of emotion, but he wasn't angry, and that confused them all. He turned to Tabitha, almost apologetic. "If we failed to control Groudon, and still failed to force the volcano to erupt...then it seems we have to face the possibility that we were -"

"Completely out of your minds?" May suggested.

"Certifiably insane?" Steven cut in.

"Homicidal morons?" Brendan offered, rounding out the trio of heroes speaking at once.

"...Misguided," Maxie finished. "Not wrong, in that humans do need land to live and the land-based Pokémon population would increase in such a situation, but _misguided_ in how we went about making room for an increasing population." Then the smallest hint of a maniacal grin was on his lips. "And if we were misguided...then there is a chance that Archie is completely wrong."

"So we'll give up on the rocket fuel, right?" Tabitha asked hopefully.

"We have more important matters to discuss," Maxie agreed. "We need to find Courtney and see if she can find these...holes. Or, better yet, hire an annoying preteen or two as advisor."

"Or you can swear your eternal allegiance to Team Breakneck," Brendan suggested.

"No," Maxie and Tabitha both answered, and then they left, taking their grunts with them.

May seemed concerned. "Do you think that's the last we'll see of Team Magma?" she asked.

"I doubt it." Even so, Brendan couldn't stop the little bubble of hope. He ignored the feeling anyway. "They've got to have another evil plan sticking to a wall somewhere. The important thing is that we're prepared for when they or Team Aqua strike next."

"Well said." Steven started to leave himself, then turned around halfway across the room. "Follow me to my house," he ordered. "I want to thank you for this, but I just don't seem to have your prize with me."

A prize? He said it like defeating Team Magma was a kind of carnival game!

But, accustomed as they were to having no choice in what they do, they followed him anyway. At least Steven had proven himself trustworthy.


	29. Under the Sea

**Archie really needs to learn to think before he acts.**

They recognized Steven's house immediately by the collection of very heavy rocks he used as lawn decorations, in places where most people would put little gnomes. Brendan raised his hand to knock, briefly reconsidered, and then slammed down on the door before he could change his mind again.

The door opened immediately, and they were greeted by the very same Metang that had helped Mega Latias win the battle against Maxie and Tabitha. Steven himself was at a desk, carefully examining a smaller chunk of rock and taking notes. Once he'd finished, he looked up to see that he had visitors.

"I'm sorry," he said quickly, covering the rock and the papers. "I was too caught up in my work to notice you'd arrived."

"My dad gets that way, too," Brendan said, dismissing it. "You promised to give us free stuff, right?"

"Not free," Steven corrected. "You have put the effort into earning this."

He handed them a small disc that they recognized as an HM, with a single word written on the case in marker: Dive.

"You can use that to go underwater," he told them. "It teaches a Pokémon to filter the air around itself to make it breathable for trainers and land Pokémon, too."

"I think Wailord already knows Dive," May said, but Brendan was already putting it away in his bag.

"Wailord is a rental from your dad," he reminded her. "We might need Jerry to do this."

"I'm not using my Swampert as an HM slave, Brendan. That's why we call my dad in the first place."

Steven cleared his throat, getting them focused again. "Either way you look at it, it's yours. Thank you again for your help."

They caught the 'suggestion' that they leave. So, they thanked Steven for the HM, promised to call him if they needed to, and hurried out the door.

Steven made sure he saw them walk past the windows before he returned to the stone. "They'd better be what I think they are," he told Metang. "Winona won't let me hear the end of it otherwise."

* * *

"It says that Sootopolis City is believed to have been formed by a crater long ago," May read off her Pokenav, as Brendan steered the Wailord across the sea. "It's also said that there are only two entrances to the city. The first is from above."

"And what's the second? Walking or Surfing right into it?"

May shook her head. "From below."

Oh, great. "So we Dive, then?"

"Only in the deep water."

"What do you think I am?" Brendan demanded, waving his hands around in mock anger. "Some kind of idiot?"

"The likable kind," May said, almost placating. "Don't worry, we have Wailord and, in case he doesn't know it already, the Dive HM. And the badges we got from Tate and Liza, which give us permission to use Dive outside of battle in the first place."

Brendan, for once, couldn't think of a smart-aleck response. "Dive," he ordered the Wailord instead, and the enormous Pokémon obeyed.

The water swirled around them, but inside the bubble, it was filtered to allow Brendan and May to breathe. May reached out to touch it, but Brendan held her back. "We don't know what will happen if you do that," he told her, and she returned her hands to Wailord's back. "And you say I'm the idiot."

"You are," May insisted, poking him in the back to tell him she didn't mean the insult. "I'm just curious about everything. It appeals to my inner Ravenclaw."

Did she really make that particular reference? "Nerd."

"Criminal."

Brendan stuck out his tongue, still not facing her, and made the loudest, wettest fart noise he could. May couldn't even think of a response immature enough to be used, but she didn't have to. Brendan had steered Wailord into a cave, and they had found a submarine.

Why couldn't they just wander into Sootopolis, like they'd planned?

May's voice was surprisingly small. "What are the odds that this is the entrance to Sootopolis?"

* * *

When Wailord surfaced, the kids were surprisingly dry. Wailord himself got to be wet again for a few short moments before they moved forward, preparing to face Team Aqua again.

"Just so we're clear," Brendan asked, as they started to wander aimlessly through the cave, "what's the opposite of Groudon?"

May was unnecessarily quiet. "I can't say," she finally managed. "I've only ever seen it written - maybe I've heard it once but didn't really process, or maybe I just wasn't listening. I can SPELL it, I have a rough idea of what the Pokémon looks like, but I can't pronounce it."

It said something about how bad the situation was that Brendan couldn't even find amusement in the fact that she didn't know everything. "Then describe it."

"That I can do." May held her arms out like an airplane's wings. "It's big, but mostly long. And it's a whale, almost, with ribbon-like tail fins instead of the fins we see on Wailord. And, of course, the rumors say that it flooded the entire world with its power to bring rain..."

"So that's why Team Aqua is after it," Brendan realized. "Don't they realize that rain comes from evaporation? Which comes from the same ocean they're trying to expand..."

"I don't think they know _anything_ ," May pointed out, ignoring the fact that Brendan had used actual science. He'd probably declare himself the Nerd King or something. "Not much beyond how to walk and talk and eat solid food, at any rate."

She let Latias out to move a few boulders with her psychic powers, likely pushed into place by a Mightyena's Strength to keep annoying kids out. It didn't do any good against anyone, except maybe Wattson...then again, she was pretty sure there was at least one Electric-type that could use Strength.

But she took comfort in the fact that she and Brendan had handled these people before. _And_ she had a supernaturally-powered Pikachu, while Archie had a Sharpedonite at best.

She glanced at her own Key Stone, then hindsight hit her hard. She stopped moving, concerning Brendan slightly. "Maxie had a Key Stone," she said quietly. "He had it, it was built into his glasses...and his Camerupt had a Cameruptite. Why didn't he use it?"

There was only one way Brendan could imagine it. "Maybe he knew the volcano thing was a bad idea," he suggested. "Maybe he was just too stubborn to admit it."

"You mean he let Steven and me win?"

"No. But he might have wanted you to win. There's a subtle difference." He grinned. " _Tate_ let you win."

May could feel her entire face turn Cheri Berry red as the memory of her friend's comments in the Mossdeep Gym resurfaced. "I would have won anyway," she mumbled, staring at the floor. "All he did was refuse to take the chance I was offering."

But Brendan did make her feel better about it. That was nice.

With Latias and her psychic abilities replacing not only Strength but allowing them to illegally float over harsh currents of water that would have left them frustrated for hours, they knew they were heading the right way when they found Shelly and a grunt standing guard over nothing.

"You two again," Shelly said, not at all shocked by the fact that they were interfering. "On a normal occasion, I'd say we're checking this place out to use as a new base. However, I did want to pay you back for what happened at the Weather Institute."

"And I want to pay you back for the cave AND the forest," the grunt added. He pulled a ball from his belt, and seemed to pause for a minute as Brendan and May both mirrored it. He looked up at Shelly for approval. "Will you join me?"

"I might as well. I owe them a taste of their own medicine."

She didn't seem as happy as she should have been, but she released her first Pokémon anyway. The grunt followed her example, and Brendan and May were close behind him.

"Pikachu, take the stage!"

"Breloom, do the thing!"

* * *

Shelly took defeat gracefully, compared to last time. "You two are ignorant brats," she said, "but I don't care anymore. This was just a stall tactic."

"Archie's over there," the grunt said, pointing ahead into another chamber. "And you can't get to him before we can!"

He took off running, and Shelly stayed behind to glare at the kids. "I expected more from you," she told them. "I thought by now you would have learned to stay out of our way."

"Why?" Brendan shrugged. "Beating you guys over and over again is just practice for the Elite Four."

"Do you really think that your badge quest is important now?" Shelly gestured at the hole the grunt had just disappeared through. "We are _trying_ to raise global sea level here."

"We get it," Brendan said, cutting into her monologue. "We got here by accident ourselves, but we are not going to sit around and watch as you and your boyfriend decide to drown an entire planet. We 'ignorant brats' live here, too."

Shelly didn't even question the 'boyfriend' comment, but she did swear vengeance as she, too, went into the next chamber. Figuring that Archie was warned by now, they followed, and Latias and Grumpig working as a team made the boulder puzzle useless.

The fog was a little more difficult to navigate.

"Why didn't we use Flash?" Brendan complained. "I can't see my own nose!"

"Stop whining, you'll give us away!"

"I whine when I want to!"

"You're such a baby!"

Brendan restrained himself from saying something childish, and instead hushed her and pulled her behind a rock. May, sensing the seriousness, went quiet.

Brendan sent out Shuppet. "Lead us to Archie," he commanded. "You're a ghost, you can absorb fog, right?" Shuppet looked at him as if he were stupid. "Fine, just go and find him and then come back to us."

That, it seemed she could do, and she floated away. She returned after only a few seconds, and then floated off again, keeping the humans on the right path.

Archie, Shelly and the grunt were there, along with, unsurprisingly, a big whale-like Pokémon. And, unsurprisingly, they saw Brendan and May at the same time that Brendan and May saw them.

Archie didn't even blink. "So it was you, after all. I should have known that nobody else could defeat Shelly and..." he looked uncomfortably at the grunt, who glared at him and impatiently tapped his foot. "I want to say Bobby, but I know that's wrong."

"It is wrong, sir." The grunt kept foot-tapping, and Archie kept trying to think.

Finally, he gave up. "I seem to have forgotten your name," he finally admitted.

"It's Benjamin!" the grunt snapped back. "I don't know how people keep forgetting that, it's not an unusual name!"

Shelly rolled her eyes theatrically, but seemed to take Benjamin's side. "You've been forgetting a lot of things lately, Archie," she pointed out. "His name, the map of the base, _my birthday..._ "

"I did not forget your birthday," Archie said defensively. "I was too busy with boss things to do more than make an announcement."

"And you barely did that."

Archie gestured at Brendan and May. "Do we have to have this argument in front of the children?" he asked, and the kids and Benjamin tried not to laugh.

"She's 'married to the ocean,' my butt," Brendan said after taking a second to compose himself.

"Married to Archie is more like it," May agreed.

"Matt might win the betting pool after all," Benjamin commented, for once not seeming to care that he and the kids were on opposite sides.

May instantly perked up. "What betting pool?" she asked excitedly, in the same way she always did when presented with the potential for new inspiration, or at least embarrassing stories. "Does this have anything to do with what we saw at the Weather Institute?"

"We don't need to know," Brendan insisted.

Archie and Shelly were giving Benjamin the look that Brendan recognized as 'exasperated parent,' but fortunately, the plan seemed to be more important than continuing this ridiculous conversation.

"Kyogre," Archie said, turning back to the whale as he pretended that it had never happened. May's mouth made a little 'O' as she realized that he had given her the proper way to say the beast's name. "I have waited so long for this day to come. The children are the only deviation from the plan."

Brendan couldn't help himself. "You and Shelly have kids, too?"

"I'm going to enjoy watching Kyogre eat this brat," Shelly said to herself, not taking her eyes off of Kyogre.

Archie stopped what he was doing, and for a moment, Brendan thought he was getting out the Red Orb. Instead, he reached for a Pokeball.

"I see where Shelly went wrong in the Weather Institute," he said, looking down at Brendan. "You defeated her. Your victory was the flaw in our plan. In order to win, we have to beat you now."

Brendan faked innocence, hoping that Breloom was strong enough for what he knew was the inevitable match against a Mega Sharpedo. "But we've already taken care of Shelly and Butch."

"Benjamin!" the grunt hissed.

"Quiet, Buford. I'm having my first real grown-up conversation."

Archie didn't want to continue it. "Mightyena, get rid of him!"

Brendan grabbed the first ball he could find. "Lairon, do the thing!"

* * *

Archie cowered in fear of the mighty Breloom. Breloom cowered in fear of the Mega Sharpedo.

The Sharpedo didn't have a type advantage now, but it was just so evil-looking that it caught the Grass-type off guard. He knew that a Mach Punch could probably take it, but he wasn't sure if he could handle the potential Rough Skin follow-up.

"Just use Mach Punch!" Brendan commanded. "We're going to a Pokémon Center for Lairon and Grumpig, do you think we're not going for you?"

That snapped Breloom out of his fear. **"You know what?"** He laughed a little and curled up his tail, preparing for the fight. **"I should have known better. Brendan's a good trainer. Whether or not he's a good person is up for debate, but he's a good trainer."**

 **"Archie is, too!"** Mega Sharpedo pointed out. **"He gives me a whole ocean to swim in and feeds me treats for not bothering him too much."**

 **"A few too many treats, from the look of it,"** Breloom said, as if he were making an observation anyone could notice, before he slammed his tail-fist down, right on the shark's nose. Now, unless Archie had a non-Mega Sharpedo in there...

But no. Archie was all out of Pokémon. "I lost to a _child?_ " he complained, and when Shelly and Benjamin stepped closer to ask if he needed help, he shook them off. "No. The boy won, it's in his rights to see me fall into despair. We're doing it anyway."

"Doing what?" Benjamin asked, uncertain, but Archie pulled the Red Orb from a hidden pocket in his suit's tail.

"Our plan," Archie replied. "Regardless of my defeat, with or without these kids present, we are going through with our plot to expand the sea, exactly as we planned."

"Archie," Shelly said, glancing between the Red Orb and the slowly-waking Kyogre, "we wrote that plan out on the back of a Pokemart receipt! I'm starting to wonder if this is really the best way to do this. I managed to copy a few notes from the Weather Institute..."

"We've come this far," Archie reminded her. "We can't let Team Magma beat us!"

Shelly waited a second longer, then decided not to voice her obvious concern and took shelter behind a large rock.

The Red Orb lit up, dispelling the fog. The ground shook, and Kyogre's eyes snapped open. It slowly made its way to the humans, before it opened its mouth, showed off its large, sharp teeth, and _screamed_ at them, so loudly that Dusky was startled out of his ball.

 **"Sound the alarm! The frogs are coming!"** He whirled his head around frantically, dimly processing that May was still in one piece, and that Brendan was still standing as well. Noticing that there were no frogs around did not do him any favors. His concern was immediately shifted to the giant blue legendary Pokémon staring him down. Then he glared around at the humans. **"What _idiot_ thought that _this_ was a good idea?"**

Kyogre screamed again, and then dove into the deep. Dusky's glare settled on Archie, who was doing an amazing job at not noticing the angry Absol.

"It didn't work," Archie said slowly. "It didn't...how? I was so careful in my planning, I thought the Blue Orb would have been too obvious..."

A sharp sound came from the device on his belt, and he picked it up. Then he said a word that suddenly made sense out of the phrase 'swear like a sailor.' "Shelly...what's-your-name. Get outside. We might be walking the plank on this one."

"Walking the plank?" Shelly dared to ask.

"Apparently, the heavy rain we summoned Kyogre for..." Archie stopped, then forced himself to go on. "There was a miscalculation. It all seems to be coming down in a particular area, instead of average heavy rain across the world." Shelly looked like she wanted to gloat, but she held her tongue. This was serious, and she didn't want to cause Archie any more problems.

May had no such restraint. "And what did you think was going to happen?" she demanded. "That Kyogre would make it rain only when _you_ wanted it to, and not whenever _it_ felt like it? You tried to kidnap Latias for her Mega Stone, tried to control the weather, and now you're basically peeing all over a hypothetical _god's_ free will. Not to mention that all that rain has to come from somewhere, so you're pretty much just recycling old stuff faster than natural evaporation." She narrowed her eyes and tilted her head, looking a lot like her Absol in that moment. "Any more brilliant ideas, Archie?"

Thunder crashed on outside. "I'm done," Archie promised.

"Good. Now." She nodded at Brendan. "Swear your eternal allegiance to Brendan and me - to Team Breakneck."

"You're kids, guys," Benjamin started, but Archie and Shelly, very reluctantly, raised their right hands.

"We swear," they chorused.

"Good enough." She turned to Brendan, her anger gone but her optimism gone with it. "Well, Sneakers? What's your plan?"

He didn't have the heart to tell her that he didn't have one. "To the surface, me hearties," he said, in his best pirate impression. "We'll figure this out from there."


	30. The Genie of Sootopolis City

**EDITOR'S NOTE: "I had an embarrassing pseudo-crush on Wallace when I was young, and that is probably why I found his redesign personally offensive. It is not why he is such an important character in the next few chapters, but it is the main reason I make fun of that redesign. The chapter title is how I first described it out loud." (RE-EDIT: "I could have sworn it said Sky Pillar. That's what we get for doing Sinnoh before Hoenn. We even had the legend say 'sky' to help us remember...")**

They didn't make it more than ten steps before they heard the thundering of footsteps and shouts of angry voices. Sure enough, Maxie appeared seconds later, leading Tabitha and a grunt along behind him. All three were very wet and very, very unhappy.

"I knew I'd find you in here," Maxie spat at Archie. "You awakened Kyogre, didn't you? You're going to drown the landmass until there's nothing left but Water-types!"

"Don't start that with me," Archie spat back. "Wasn't it you that had the 'brilliant' idea to wake up Groudon?"

"Boys!" May snapped, getting between them as Maxie tried to huff a protest. "I get it, you don't want to play nice. But as the token good influence here, I say that we have to play together to stop the bullies from taking over the playground."

"I'd rather swallow a live Tentacool," Archie snapped, at her this time.

May straightened herself to her full, entirely unimpressive height. "Let's not forget who owns you now," she said quietly, almost as if it was a threat. Brendan had never been so proud.

"I don't mean to bring down the party," Shelly said, gesturing to the cave ceiling, "but I think it might be necessary for all of us to suck up our pride and listen to the kids. They're the only ones making sense right now."

"Don't we know it," Tabitha agreed.

Maxie and Archie stood there for a moment, the typical stubborn men, and then Maxie gave up. "Fine," he said, as if it left a bad taste in his mouth. "As this whole disaster is partly my fault, I'll help your stupid little team. Even if it means I have to work with him."

"I'm with ya, kid," was all Archie had to say on the matter. "This idiot and I need to fix what we started."

Brendan had a moment to think about how cool it was that he had an army, but stopped before it went too far. "Outside," he repeated. "I'll be honest, we've made it our whole journey by throwing plans at a wall to see what sticks. Who knows, maybe we'll get some outside help."

* * *

Archie and Maxie both came to the conclusion that Brendan and May were either psychic or had somehow managed to harness the raw power of good luck. Neither wanted to know how, but it gave them a little bit of reassurance that they could fix their mistakes as long as the kids were supervising.

Steven Stone, arriving as their 'outside help' almost immediately after they reached the surface, didn't seem to have the same idea.

"So you...convinced them to come to our side?"

May grinned. "It wasn't hard."

"Yeah," Brendan agreed. "They all seemed to understand that they messed up."

"Not helping," Archie told him.

"I want nothing to do with them," Benjamin added.

Steven pretended that it all made sense, and turned on Archie. "And I'm sure you know that the source of this is Sootopolis City, the place my closest friend calls home."

Archie whistled innocently. "Can your friend swim?"

"That won't matter, if the fish tank he lives in fills completely."

"We can handle it," Brendan promised. "Your friend's life is in our hands."

Steven had a moment of panic, but he brushed it off. "Wallace is more than capable of handling it himself," he tried to object, but Brendan shook his head.

"Nope. You can't get out of it. I need to get the badge from Sootopolis anyway, might as well stop a disaster while I'm at it."

Steven took a deep breath through his nose, then let it out through his mouth. "Let me go ahead and give him a head start," he decided. "You should prepare yourselves...and deal with them." He gestured to the team leaders, or whatever Archie and Maxie were now. "Good luck."

And he flew off on his Skarmory, leaving them all behind.

Brendan handed a Pokeball to Maxie. "Take this Wailord to Mossdeep City. Return it to Professor Birch for me, May and I will be using her Latias to fly. If you decide to keep it for yourself, you will be faced with Tate and Liza, who would be the kind of creepy twins you might see in a hallway in a horror movie spoof. They are loyal to May and me - May's got Tate sworn into Team Breakneck already."

"No I don't," May tried to protest, but it was ignored by everybody.

"Archie and Shelly, you have Water-types. I'm assuming you can use Surf."

"I have a Corphish," Benjamin suggested. "I don't use it for battle, but it can take us back to the base."

"The base is flooded by now," Archie said, as if he no longer cared about his plan. "We'll go to Sootopolis with you."

"Not necessary." Brendan pointed in the direction of Mossdeep City. "Go there and let the twins give you your initiation ceremonies."

"We don't have -" May started, but Brendan shushed her.

"And tell them that we want it on video."

The former team leaders, and their respective 'first mates,' showed no sign of willingness, but they had all sworn to take orders from the kids, so they felt no choice.

"Revenge is underrated," Brendan said, watching them leave. "That felt awesome."

* * *

Flying Latias in good weather conditions was easy. Flying Latias in the middle of a storm was not. For one thing, they were much closer to the lightning now, and the Pokémon they were searching for...

Well, that was the other thing.

They found Kyogre as soon as they entered Sootopolis, and, as luck would have it, they found Groudon there, too, standing on the only patch of dry land that they could see. Even as they watched, it made a face at Kyogre, prompting the blue Pokémon to scream in frustration.

"It sure likes to scream," Brendan commented, surprised that he could still hear. "Should we get involved, or just leave them here?"

"I'd leave them here," May decided. "Who knows, they could actually be friends, in an opposites-attract kind of way."

At that precise moment, Kyogre jumped for Groudon's head. Brendan glared at the back of May's head.

"Any other brilliant ideas, May?"

"I'm done," was the quiet response, right before she pulled Latias in for a landing.

Latias centered her landing around a familiar face, and another face that wasn't quite as familiar. Brendan still knew him at once - this had to be Lisia's uncle. The similarities were too great, and he looked too young to be her father. They had the same hair and eye color, dressed in similar colors (though the man almost made Brendan choke with barely-restrained laughter) and, judging by May's starry-eyed stare and the sudden hit to Brendan's self-esteem, both Lisia and her uncle were almost supernaturally pretty even without the use of stage makeup.

"What are you _wearing_?"

May's hands clamped over her mouth, and her eyes went wide as the horror of her question fully dawned on her. She was following her friend into what was almost certain doom, met a celebrity on the way, and the first thing she said to said celebrity was a comment on his costume?

Steven found it funny. The other man did not. "Steven," he said, as if the name were a dirty word, "when you said you found heroes, I assumed you meant heroes who were not children."

"Then you don't know me at all, do you?" Steven moved to stand behind Brendan and May, a hand on each child's shoulder. They couldn't shake the feeling that they were being used as human shields. "Besides, Lisia's told you about Team Breakneck, hasn't she?"

"Four teenagers getting into trouble do not add up to them saving the world."

"Technically, there are six kids in it now," Brendan cut in. "Five and a half at minimum." When neither paid attention to that, due to the legendary battle going on right in the middle of the city, Brendan changed the topic. "Are you the guy known as Flannery's 'partial' romantic partner?"

That got their attention, and Lisia's uncle took only a few seconds to decide whether or not to just tell them about it.

"It was a photo manipulation on the internet," was the short story. "She found it on a lesser-known gossip website, run by people with far too much time on their hands bent on forcing romance out of budding friendship, and was attempting to do the same with us. We've been submitting our own articles ever since, with increasingly unbelievable content to see if any of it got through screening. The latest story is still unpublished, but states that I won her hand in marriage through a poker game."

"That last part just raised further questions," May commented under her breath. "What made you think it was Wallace, Brendan?"

Brendan pulled out his badge case, and showed both of them the Heat Badge. "She said her partial fiancé was 'hard to miss' and looked like a drunk genie," he explained. Wallace's pointed glare at Steven went unnoticed. "I didn't get context, and I don't think May heard the genie part at all, but Flannery said _you_ might have the power to stop Team Magma for her."

"So this is the guy she said would help us?" May's star-struck opinion of Wallace was quickly fading. "Why did Brendan and Steven and I have to do it, then?"

"Never mind that now, we're wasting time." Wallace gestured to the cave behind him. "This is the Cave of Origin. Inside you may find the key to stopping Groudon and Kyogre's rampage. I would do it myself, but it's sacred ground to the people of Sootopolis. No man or woman born in this city may enter."

"Can't you send Steven?" Brendan complained, the previous conversation forgotten. "He was probably born in Rustboro, so he has to be able to go!"

"No," Steven answered. "I have to help Wallace evacuate the town."

"Why can't I help evacuate the town?" Brendan whined.

"Because you have to go into the Cave of Origin."

"And because Steven knows he can't trust you," May added. "But I do. You'll be fine."

Brendan caught on immediately. "You're not coming with me, are you?" May shook her head. He understood that, too. "I get it. Not when you have those faces to look at."

"Don't be so grumpy," May huffed, but Brendan saw her smile. "After all, this is Lisia's uncle we're dealing with. All he has to do is say one word to her parents and POOF! No more Dancing Shadow, only a Contest star from now on. And THEN how will your relationship work out?"

"What relationship?"

"You know," May teased, elbowing him in the side. "Like mine and Tate's."

Oh. That. "I didn't mean anything like that," Brendan complained. "It was fun seeing him worked up, and then you got worked up whenever I brought it back to your attention so I kept it going."

"Oh," May said with a grin. "I know."

And she pushed him into the cave and disappeared without another word. She had essentially left her best friend to die.

But he'd be ok. Probably.

* * *

Brendan had been in the cave for no more than ten minutes before Masquerain showed up, bringing Wallace and May along with her. That was confusing.

"What's Wallace even doing in here?" Brendan asked, unable to keep the accusation out of his voice. "He just said that it was sacred ground and Sootopolis people aren't allowed in here!"

"That's my fault," May admitted. "I said I was concerned about you getting lost, and then Steven said something about our history with Archie and Maxie might cause the destruction of Sootopolis if you went into the Cave of Origin unsupervised. Then Wallace said a word I'm not allowed to repeat and told his Pokémon to go and evacuate the people without him, leaving me in charge of keeping angry Pokémon off of him as he makes sure we don't end up starving to death in here."

Brendan wasn't convinced. "And if he was born in Sootopolis and this is his first time in the cave, how does he know where we're going?"

Wallace glanced at Masquerain, who seemed to have the same question at the front of her mind. "I haven't been in here before," he told them, "but that does not mean that I haven't sent people in here with cameras or map-making equipment." When Brendan gave him a funny look, Wallace instantly switched to defense. "I was curious and I found a loophole. Is that not how you and May have survived this long?"

Brendan focused on the mission once again. "Can't argue with that."

"So did your friends ever find what you needed them to find here?" May asked. "What are we even looking for?"

"Rayquaza."

The word was strange to Brendan, but judging by May's reaction, it was yet another legendary Pokémon. "What does that one do?"

"According to legend, it could calm Groudon and Kyogre. Steven found it in this cave when we were children, and has the photo to prove it." Wallace stopped, looked at a crater in the ground, and struggled not to let his anger and disappointment show. "And it seems to have gone back home."

"All that worry for nothing, huh?" Brendan shrugged. "Don't worry, Wallace. We've gotten ourselves out of stickier situations using nothing but pointless destruction."

"I don't doubt you have." Wallace didn't say it like he believed they could stop it. He sounded like he was making plans to evacuate the area.

May reached for her Pokenav, and called not Lisia but Wally. "What's the situation in the Littleroot to Petalburg area?"

"I don't know," Wally replied, unsure of why she was calling. "I'm in Fortree City now. It's really hot here, and Winona's getting scared, thinking that the trees might catch on fire. Should I go home?"

"No. Stay there and try to calm Winona down a little. If you have a Pokémon that can use Rain Dance, do it now. Even a few minutes is good enough."

"Is this a Team Breakneck thing?"

"It's definitely a Team Breakneck thing."

"So I'm in charge of saving Fortree?"

"Yes." May could just imagine Wally being so proud of his first official mission. "And if the rain lasts more than an hour, call something else to use Sunny Day. Good luck, agent."

"To you, too, boss," Wally said, and switched off.

Brendan didn't even wait before asking something from his living mythology encyclopedia. "Where does Rayquaza live?"

"The sky," May answered absently. "That's what the myth said...though there's some that say the sky doesn't refer to the literal sky, but to the highest place in Hoenn."

Wallace's attention span, which had been drifting in and out of the conversation as he tried to come to conclusions on his own, was suddenly pulled back. Brendan could almost see the cartoon light bulb over his head. "Sky Pillar," he said, as if that answered everything. "I've never taken mythology seriously, but now I'm starting to wonder. It was Hoenn's Olympus back then...and if Rayquaza is a god, where better to look for one?"

May's eyebrows scrunched, as the name of the place rang a bell in her head but she couldn't remember anything about it. "Wallace, we don't even know where Sky Pillar is."

"But I do." Wallace turned around and started to leave the cave. "Follow me, and I'll keep you alive. Until Rayquaza finds you, in which case I will have no hesitation in sacrificing you in exchange for saving the rest of Hoenn."

It was hard to tell if he was joking or not, but it was also hard to take him seriously with his drunk genie costume. They'd assume it was just a dark joke until he proved he was willing to murder them. Then they would have Pikachu Meteor Mash him and sacrifice _him_ to Rayquaza.

* * *

Wallace had taken his Gyarados, as the people of Sootopolis would miss a giant, evil-looking serpent the least, and it was Gyarados that led them out into a small cluster of islands, as Brendan and May took Latias. They wondered how he managed to take it out of Sootopolis without using Dive, but decided that maybe it had and he just hadn't given the command out loud.

Wallace, for his part, was trying very hard to keep a clear head, especially as they came to shore. "Another ancient Sootopolis secret," he explained, stopping May from wandering ahead. "My ancestors sealed this place. You won't find it alone."

"So how can we hope to find Rayquaza?"

Wallace had no answer, but found a secret cave effortlessly. "In here," he instructed, and pulled them inside. "We have to hurry, no time for sightseeing."

It was a shame, May thought as she followed behind. This place, these ruins, were more than perfect for a story setting. She was thinking ancient gods and goddesses, the human avatars of the legendary Pokémon of Hoenn...

The sound of a Pokémon came from below, and before any of them could process it, there was a large Claydol standing in front of them. Wallace went for Gyarados, but Brendan took a stand first.

"Lairon, do the thing!"

May caught the signal, and looked back up at Wallace. "He'll catch up," she told him. "You go and get Rayquaza."

"And you?"

May tapped a ball at her belt, the one Wallace suspected held Latias. "I'll be your bodyguard. I already have one legendary on my side. If it won't listen to us humans, maybe it will pay attention to her."

There was no further objection, and Wallace led her away, deeper into the ruins of Sky Pillar.


	31. The Mighty Rayquaza

**In which Brendan's team is completed.**

Even after the Claydol fell and Lairon reached her final stage, Brendan was starting to regret sending May and Wallace ahead of him. He had no idea where he was going, and Aggron was too heavy to climb up on the breakable upper levels. So, giving her the Aggronite as a reward, he called her back and made a promise to himself to use Shuppet and Grumpig more often.

The loud roar at the top of the tower told Brendan that he was going in the right direction, and he gave up on finding the right ladder. He wanted to be a part of that action.

"Grumpig, Psychic me through the hole!"

Grumpig had not been instructed to do something like that before, but he had watched Latias do it, and was kind of excited for his own moves to be used illegally. He even followed Brendan, self-levitation a bit trickier than moving his trainer but still within his range of abilities.

The floor shook, and this time it was answered with another, different roar, as if Gyarados had been called in to explain things. Grumpig didn't need orders that time, and soon he and Brendan were witnessing the action firsthand.

Wallace had sent out his Gyarados, just like Brendan had suspected. Latias, too, was a witness, and whatever they were saying in Pokémon-speak had the enormous green dragon focused. The dragon was terrifying, several times the length of a Seviper, and perhaps even longer than Groudon was tall. But, as it looked between the three humans, and then the three Pokémon, it seemed to reach a conclusion.

Rayquaza roared again, before taking to the skies. Brendan ran forward, pushing past Wallace, in an attempt to grab on to its tail, but the legendary Pokémon had already gone.

"It didn't stay?"

He wasn't sure why it was a question. Maybe it was because he had expected one of them to catch it. Maybe it was because he had expected himself to catch it. After all, legendaries did find trainers every so often, as May could testify.

Whatever it was, May had the answer. "It had to go," she stated, as Latias nodded to prove she wasn't lying. "Wallace said he was starting to get worried about Sootopolis." A loud boom of thunder made them all jump, but May picked up right where she left off. "So then Rayquaza started talking, and then eventually we decided to just have Gyarados and Latias speak for us, so we'd know the conversation wasn't one-sided."

"And it didn't let you catch it?"

May shrugged. "I guess it didn't find us worthy."

"But _I_ could have been! Why couldn't you guys wait for me to get there?"

May pointed at the place where Wallace had already left, on his way to go back to Sootopolis and watch Rayquaza work its magic. "He had more important things on his mind than making sure were all deemed worthy."

Brendan heard the 'and so should we' that she chose not to add. Grumbling to himself about not getting a legendary, he climbed back down and led May out of the tower, where their tour guide had already disappeared. They saw something moving in the water that could have been Wallace and Gyarados, and something in the sky that was definitely Rayquaza.

Latias followed the sky dragon all the way back to Sootopolis.

Rayquaza took notice.

* * *

Wallace arrived before Rayquaza did, to the terrified greetings of his other Pokémon as they swarmed around him and Gyarados. Milotic in particular seemed panicked, and one look proved why.

Archie, Maxie, Shelly and Tabitha were standing in front of the Gym, trying to explain things to Steven.

"This isn't about me," Steven insisted, in response to something Tabitha had said. "This is about the entire planet. Brendan and May are cleaning up your messes, again, and you're lucky Wallace learned how to open the seal on the Sky Pillar. Thanks to them, we're going to be fine." He looked past them, focusing on Wallace. "You did find Rayquaza, right?"

"We found it," Wallace promised. Steven knew him well enough to tell that he was still stressed despite the calm exterior, and knew better than to press it.

Instead, he made a different observation. "You left them alone?"

Wallace carefully avoided eye contact by looking to the sky. "Rayquaza should have been here by now."

"Unbelievable," Steven said under his breath. "You really did leave them behind."

"You haven't been keeping a close eye on them, either."

There was a shout from the sky, and down went Latias, two kids on her back. Following this was Rayquaza, who was more furious than they had imagined.

 **"Just once!"** it snapped. **"Just once, I'd like a chance to come out of hiding and _not_ be stalked by humans!"**

 **"They didn't stalk you,"** Latias tried to protest. **"We were heading back to Sootopolis anyway, remember?"**

 **"Did you have to get so close?"**

 **"My eyes aren't waterproof!"** Latias snapped. **"Gosh, it's almost like I have no control over a natural disaster! Who would have guessed?"**

Rayquaza made a sound that might have been a snort, but turned its attention to the fighting Pokémon. **"Back to your holes,"** it ordered, getting their attention like a drill sergeant commands his troops. **"The idiot humans made a mistake. You don't need to punish the rest of the world for it."**

 **"But they wanted us to do it!"** Groudon dared to whine.

 **"What they want is of no concern to us,"** Rayquaza explained. **"Now, go. Before I do something that all of us will regret."**

 **"But -"**

Kyogre's objection was drowned out by a loud roar. Sulking, both Pokémon disappeared, taking the weather disasters with them.

Brendan watched in mild surprise. Then he started laughing.

"Dude," he managed to choke out. "Rayquaza's a _mom."_

* * *

With the legendary fight done, and the weather disasters following, there wasn't much left to say. Brendan, of course, said what _did_ need to be said.

"You didn't give Professor Birch his Wailord back, did you?"

Maxie looked mildly horrified. "No," he admitted. "We were halfway to Mossdeep when it all started getting worse, so I took it in a new direction."

Brendan was grinning, which took the 'mildly' off of Maxie's horrified expression. "That was disobeying a direct order," he told him, and Archie struggled not to laugh. "Do you know what that means?"

"That we have to return the Wailord from Sootopolis?"

"Nope." Brendan's smile reached Cheshire Cat proportions, and he turned to May. "Stop me if you were thinking this, too. I was imagining a punishment using a diaper, a car battery, and six pounds of tapioca..."

"Absolutely not," May interrupted.

"But Maxie wasn't going to be _wearing_ the diaper!"

"I know," May reassured him, "and that was the scary part."

Maxie didn't want to know, and he gestured to Archie next. "And I don't see him and his..." he looked Shelly up and down, trying to phrase it in a way that he wouldn't have to explain to a pair of preteens, " _treasure_ getting fed to their own Pokémon."

"Of course you don't," May promised, paying special notice to the awkward glances between the Team Aqua leaders. "I don't let Brendan do anything that would result in death. I'm associated with this guy, I don't want his criminal record getting longer than it already is."

"One bottle of soda," Brendan hissed.

"Which led to resisting arrest, to disturbing the peace, to assault against an officer," May finished.

"Not all of that was me!"

Now Maxie _really_ didn't want to know, and was spared from Archie asking by May changing the topic. "I want the evil teams to swear they've reformed," she ordered. "And then I want their leaders to promise to keep them on the right track."

Archie, Maxie and their 'first mates' all made the promise, finally understanding that causing droughts or endless rain was not a good idea.

"Now," Brendan continued, "learn to get along. I don't want to get in the middle of your conflicts again."

That one was a little more difficult. Shelly and Tabitha didn't have anything personal against each other, merely different ideas and conflicting loyalties. Archie and Maxie, on the other hand...

"So we're friends now?"

They didn't throw punches. That was a step in the right direction. Still, Maxie replied to Archie's dumb statement with as much careful restraint as would be needed to keep their tiny tyrants happy.

"I'd start with 'no longer enemies.'"

"Good enough," Archie agreed, and let his Sharpedo out. "Now get that Wailord back to the professor before the kids have your heads. Shelly and I need to have a long talk about...the future. Of Team Aqua," he added, catching the 'inspiration' look on May's face and immediately understanding just what it meant. "Don't go pairing us off now, lass. I'm her boss, it wouldn't work out."

May just smiled back. "Archie," she said innocently, faking it just as well as Brendan would, " _I_ never said anything about pairing you off. _You_ came to that conclusion. Besides, I'm pretty sure your whole team ships you guys, so you should probably address it in your long talk, anyway."

Shelly's eyes flicked between May and Archie, and she eventually let out an obviously over-exaggerated sigh. "Annoying brat," she said, but it was almost fondly now. "I might actually miss your insane ramblings."

She let out her own Sharpedo, and she and Archie rode off together.

When asked about the Wailord, Maxie and Tabitha refused, giving it back to May. "I would prefer if we were given a ride with your Latias," Maxie told her, "but I would understand if you decided against it."

"Don't worry, I've got a better idea." May picked up her Pokenav and called her father.

Professor Birch answered this time, though from the noise that could only be described as hail, Castform had accompanied him on a field research trip. "Yes? Hello?"

"Hi, Dad!" May held up a finger to keep Brendan from shouting a greeting of his own. "We need to borrow another Pokémon or two. Ones with Fly."

"Can't you use Latias?" The hail stopped, and May imagined Castform floating beside the professor's head as she tried to listen to both sides of the conversation.

"Brendan and I can use Latias," May answered cryptically. "This one is for a few...let's just say 'no longer enemies' and leave it at that."

* * *

Once Maxie and Tabitha had gotten rides on a borrowed Tropius (they hadn't been fond of the skies, either, apparently) and both kids had reassured the professor that they were fine after being in the center of the disaster, that left them alone in front of the Sootopolis Gym with Steven and Wallace.

"Rayquaza has gone back to the Sky Pillar," Wallace told them, looking up at the sky one more time, as if looking for its return. "I suppose it's going to wait there until the next disaster."

"It didn't even let me catch it?" Brendan complained. " _May_ got a legendary! Why not me?"

"Because even legendaries don't trust you with their kind," May answered at once.

Brendan gave her a not-so-gentle push, but not enough to knock her into the water.

Steven picked out a ball, and handed it over to him. "I hope this will make up for your lack of legendaries," he said, though he seemed more entertained than apologetic. "It's a Beldum that I bred a while back. I've been raising it for you, so it might evolve into a Metang by the time you get through Victory Road."

Brendan already had a Steel-type, and a Mega Steel-type at that. Still, he didn't want to turn it down entirely yet. "Don't you want the Metang?"

"Actually, I bred it as payment for playing mail carrier for my father. It was always intended to be yours, I just took care of it until it was ready for you. It even has an Exp. Share to keep it from going directly into battle." He saw their awed faces and continued. "Dad apparently thought that it was enough to repay you with the Beldum, but then one of his employees mentioned how you saved him in Petalburg Woods as well as when you stopped Team Aqua from taking the Goods."

"Huh," Brendan commented, taking his Beldum without further complaint. "I guess that guy was kind of useful, after all."

"And I guess Flannery was right," May added, "in an unimportant way." When all three of the guys gave her confused looks, she pointed at Wallace. "She said that he could help us stop Team Magma. He unlocked the Sky Pillar for us. So I guess he did help."

"He could have stopped them on his own." Steven commented, but was cut off by Wallace.

"And you could have stopped Team Aqua. But the fact was that neither of us could find where they were hiding, while Brendan and May could. The assistance we managed to give them is all we could give." His point made, he returned to the kids. "That said, I don't think you should mention this to Lisia. This Team Breakneck thing is a game to her, and I wouldn't want her to risk her life in an attempt to continue the legacy."

"Don't worry," Brendan promised, faking innocence with all the practiced perfection he needed to fool most adults. May chose not to comment. "Lisia is going to be stuck with costume design and publicity work from now on."

Wallace didn't seem convinced, but, like May, he chose not to comment. "I'm going to go and re-seal the Sky Pillar. The last thing we need is for someone like Team Magma or Team Aqua getting their hands on Rayquaza."

"And I'm going back to Mossdeep," Steven announced. "Do you want a ride, Wallace?"

"I'll take Gyarados." Once Steven was gone, Wallace stayed to finish. "The Gym closed for the weather, as the Gym Leader was taking part in the evacuation. It will be open tomorrow."

"So where is the Gym Leader? Why haven't we seen him?"

"He _started_ the evacuation." Wallace released Gyarados again, but gave them all a farewell gesture. "I look forward to battling you one day. Thank you for your help."

And that was how Brendan and May were left alone in front of the Sootopolis City Gym.

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam, Breloom, Aggron (evolved this chapter) Grumpig, Shuppet, Beldum_

 _May: Jerry, Masquerain, Pikachu, Torkoal, Latias, Dusky_


	32. The Surprise Gym Leader

**Of course Wallace warned Juan about these kids.**

Brendan woke up first the next morning, anticipation of his final badge and the possibility of honorary Championship having tugged him awake.

Or, more likely, it was that May had stayed up late talking to Wally about his mission in Fortree having 'mysteriously' ended, luckily before any fires. Wally's Kirlia had apparently evolved, and they spent a while gloating over their full parties before they finally ended the call.

With May still sleeping, he decided to dedicate the time to planning out his strategy. He was positive that the Gym Leader used Water-types, given the location of Sootopolis and how it needed a Pokémon with Surf or illegal uses of Fly to get anywhere. That was an automatic use of Breloom, and disqualification of Adam. He'd replace the Blaziken with the Pikachu again.

Aggron herself was part Rock-type, but he'd heard that her Mega form was pure Steel. Steel had neutral damage from Water-types, so she could be in battle, Mega Evolve on the first turn, and see how far luck could take her. Beldum would come along for the experience, and with the Exp. Share, he didn't even have to use it in battle.

Grumpig could stay, and Shuppet could probably be replaced with Jerry or Dusky. He almost felt bad for shoving her off on May when a Gym battle was the perfect opportunity to evolve, but he wanted this journey to be over already. He wanted to go home, and sleep in his new house for the first time.

Come to think of it, he'd forgotten what his new bedroom even looked like. It was probably spotlessly clean and with nothing broken, so un-Brendan that it made him wonder if his parents had kicked him out on purpose, under pretext of just letting him go on a journey...

He was distracted by the sound of a grumpy girl waking up across the room. He forced a smile and leaned over her head, and was rewarded with a scream before she processed it all.

"Rise and shine, sleeping beauty," he taunted, and May made a pitiful swipe for his head. "Today's a big day. It's our last day before we hit Victory Road."

May shoved her head under her pillow and said something. It sounded like she was commanding Pikachu to Meteor Mash him.

"That's not the way to speak, princess," he scolded, pulling her out of bed despite her protests. "We helped save the world yesterday."

"Rayquaza saved the world. All we did was wake it up and watch."

"What if I offered you cake?"

May said something under her breath, but she got to her feet. "You'd better not be lying."

* * *

The Sootopolis City Gym was, of course, Water-type. Brendan awarded himself thirty points to Slytherin for that one.

"But it's all made up," May stated calmly, "so the points don't matter."

"You're just mad because Ravenclaw's losing."

May pushed him forward with more force than she'd been intending, and both were surprised when the ice coating the gym floor cracked. For a moment, they watched the cracks spread from Brendan's foot, forking out at all possible angles like small lightning bolts before stopping. Then, slowly, they lifted their heads to make eye contact.

"A Gym puzzle?" May asked uncertainly.

"Looks like it," Brendan agreed.

"Cracking the ice to reach the next level?"

"Probably."

"And we're not wasting time by doing this legally, are we?"

Brendan's reaction was to pull out a ball. "You read my mind. Breloom, come and help us stomp these out!"

May, of course, knew better than to think that she could figure this out without him. "You might want to call out Grumpig and Jerry," she reminded him, before picking Torkoal and Dusky to join the ice-stomping party.

They heard the cries of Gym trainers from below, screaming about cheating. Brendan, May and the Pokémon were having too much fun to care.

And, when the kids had crossed and the Pokémon had finished stomping, they called them back to the balls to start again on the next level.

* * *

The Gym Leader was not a happy man when they finally reached him. In fact, Brendan was pretty sure the only reason he didn't throw them out and give them a lifetime ban was because he'd heard of their involvement with Rayquaza.

Or maybe he didn't want to be the one to have to explain to Norman about his son not getting a badge. Did Gym Leaders have conferences?

The Gym Leader quickly pretended to care when Brendan reached the field. "Good morning," he said politely, almost threateningly calm. "I would like to thank you for what you did. Wallace told me everything."

"I thought Wallace was the Gym Leader," May started, giving the man a suspicious look. "You're Juan. You stepped down from the Gym Leader position."

"You weren't wrong," the man explained, "but you are, perhaps, misunderstanding. Wallace _was_ the Gym Leader. I taught him everything, both in battles and in Contests. I have taken the position back due to recent developments that may or may not have been Wallace getting arrested by the fashion police."

"The fashion police are real?" May asked before she could stop herself.

Brendan thought about asking about Juan's possible encounters with the fashion police, but decided that tights under shorts weren't too terrible compared to Wallace's...whatever it was. "Can we battle now?" he asked instead. "I just helped save the world, and I want to go home and sleep in my own bed for once."

"Then we'll battle," Juan agreed, and selected his first Pokémon. "As this is your eighth badge, I assume you have come prepared?"

"Of course." Brendan had already selected a Pokémon of his own, and was already preparing to call her out. "You make the first choice, Juan."

"We'll start with the easy ones." Juan threw the first ball. "I select Luvdisc!"

An air-swimming heart? That was easy. "Pikachu, do the thing!"

* * *

Pikachu, Breloom and Jerry were good enough for most of Juan's Pokémon. There was no trouble at all up until the Kingdra came out. That's when things started to go south.

It was a Water-type, but it was also a Dragon-type. Dragons were weak to only three types, and Brendan had none of them. Pikachu's Draining Kiss worked, but it didn't have the type bonus that would have made it more than just 'helpful,' and he ended up losing her in the fight.

But he wasn't worried. He had a secret weapon.

"Aggron, do the thing!"

Juan wasn't afraid of the monster standing in front of him, not even considering that she was much bigger than his Kingdra. "You do know that Steel-types don't resist Water attacks enough to save your Aggron's Rock typing."

"I know that." Brendan caught Aggron's eye, and she seemed to understand what he was going to do next. "I wasn't planning on using her as she is."

May's horrified squeak echoed through the room. "You mean you're...?"

Brendan raised his hand with the Key Stone. "Aggron, Mega Evolve!"

"He did it," May said, hiding her face in her hands. She didn't want to watch the Incident that would naturally follow.

Juan clearly didn't, either, but his Gym Leader duty told him to not surrender and to give Mega Aggron a chance. He took a moment to remind himself that Wallace trusted this boy enough, and that Brendan was the friend of a legendary trainer, and called for Rest. The Kingdra put a Chesto Berry in its mouth to keep it awake, and Mega Aggron waved her arms around, roaring in fury.

"That's garbage, dude!" Brendan complained, but he knew that it was within the rules. "Metal Claw!"

"Water Pulse!" Juan commanded, silently praying for confusion.

It never happened. A few attacks later, and Kingdra was down, Mega Aggron returning to her ball just in time for Juan to call on his final Pokémon, Crawdaunt.

Breloom returned to the field, and the battle began again.

* * *

The Rain Badge sat in Brendan's palm, the light from the window reflecting off of it and onto the ceiling. Crawdaunt hadn't been as hard to defeat as Kingdra, and the experience bonus to Beldum had come in handy again.

"You do have a talent for battle," Juan commented. "But then, you are Norman's boy, aren't you?"

Of course. "That's what the DNA test said," Brendan answered, trying not to make faces at the Gym Leader. "All five times."

Juan didn't even pause. Wallace must have warned him about everything except the Aggronitem including Brendan and May's typical modes of conversation. "You have eight badges now. I assume you will take the Pokémon League challenge next?"

Brendan clicked the badge into his case, not looking Juan in the eye. "It's the last step," he said, as if it were obvious. "Once I become honorary Champion, or maybe even _actual_ Champion, I get to be ahead of my father and not have to be reminded that I'm Norman's son. He'll get asked if he's Brendan's father all the time. That'll be a nice change."

"You mean you went all this way just to top your father's accomplishments?"

Brendan tried not to sound like he thought Juan was stupid when he answered. "Yes."

"It's all he wants out of life," May explained.

"That isn't true," Brendan said, finally calling Breloom back into his ball. "I have an interest in cooking even though I'm too lazy to learn. I want to do that someday, too." He stroked his imaginary goatee in thought. "And I want to make a flamethrower, but Dad won't let me do that."

"I won't, either," May told him bluntly. "You have Adam for that."

"That was not our current topic of discussion," Juan reminded him. "You were going to take your badges to Victory Road, leaving Sootopolis City forever."

Brendan faked innocence again, this time putting too much of it into the act so Juan would understand it was false. "You don't want us gone _forever,_ do you?"

Juan's calm didn't fade. "Consider this an official ban from Sootopolis," he said seriously. "The two of you have made more enemies than children your age should, and I do not want my city to be caught in the target again."

Brendan almost objected to that, but he stopped himself. "You might have a point," he decided, keeping his own voice calm. "We'll be leaving now. Come on, May."

May followed without a word, turning and waving goodbye to Juan, supposedly forever. Unlike Brendan, she knew a Gym Leader alone didn't have the power to ban them from an entire city.

Juan waited until they were out of earshot, and then called the nurse at the Pokémon League building.

"Warn the Elite Four and Champion," he instructed. "Tell them...they're coming."


	33. Separation and Reunion

**In which the authors have a Delta Episode shout-out.**

Brendan and May had gotten instructions from the Pokémon Center, and had decided that calling to borrow the Wailord again after _just_ having returned it was too much trouble.

"I don't know why you won't just drop me off at the League building," Brendan said as he clung to Latias.

May shrugged. "Because Victory Road is a rite of passage," she explained, as if she didn't completely believe it herself. "All of Dad's other Pokedex carriers said so."

"How many have made it to the Hall of Fame?" Brendan dared to ask.

"I don't know. Maybe five."

"And how long has he been doing this?"

May said something so quietly it might not have been heard, but Brendan tuned in enough to pick it out. "Since he became a professor."

"Which is how long?"

"No idea. Longer than I've been alive." May didn't seem to be very eager to continue this conversation, but she called Latias back to be used as a 'hack Pokémon' until they managed to escape the maze of Victory Road. Brendan was grateful for that, but he quickly realized that he had no idea where to go.

"It shouldn't be too hard," May told him, to Brendan's disbelief. "You're not the only trainer with eight badges and something to prove. Just follow the path of trainers that want to challenge you to a battle."

"And what will you be doing?"

May tapped her chin. "Well," she said carefully, "I'm actually out of popcorn, so I guess I'll join you as your backup. It shouldn't be too hard when we're together, should it?"

"It shouldn't," Brendan agreed, "but that doesn't mean it won't be."

"Then we'll annihilate anyone and anything that stands in our way," May announced. "Just like old times."

Brendan smiled, a genuine smile that didn't scare her at all. "Just like old times," he repeated. "I think I can manage that."

* * *

Courtney had been gone by the time morning had arrived.

Maxie and Tabitha had returned to the base, and had told Courtney and the grunts that Team Magma as they knew it was over. The three leaders had spent the rest of the day making a speech, and Courtney had gone to her room when it had become too much for her.

She had never come out. One of the grunts only found out that she'd left when she had come to make sure Courtney was sleeping and not dead. She'd found the couch Courtney had preferred to sleep on missing an Admin and cold to touch.

Maxie knew that Courtney could look after herself. He wasn't worried. That lack of worry was why he was pacing his office, trying to figure out where she could have gone. After all, they weren't friends, merely co-workers. He only wanted to make sure she was officially resigning...

"She won't answer my calls, Boss," Tabitha said suddenly, cutting into Maxie's thoughts.

"Try it again," Maxie ordered, before he returned to his pacing.

Tabitha almost commented, but he knew Maxie too well. It would be useless to get him to admit that he wanted Courtney safe. Even if Tabitha himself admitted that he felt the same way.

Maxie didn't notice Tabitha's half-sound. He turned on the computer, not hoping for anything but a distraction.

Imagine his surprise when he saw a message from Courtney. For once, he didn't mind his second-in-command reading over his shoulder.

 _I would have told you to your faces,_ she wrote, _but I'm not good with speaking. I'm just going to put together a new routine. No matter what you hear, I don't hate you, Maxie. Tabitha could be worse. You two were what convinced me to enjoy myself. I'll come back. I'll make you proud._

Tabitha finished reading before Maxie did. "She likes us," he translated. "She likes us and cut herself out to spare herself the pain of us drifting apart."

"That's ridiculous," Maxie said, pushing the thought away.

"That she likes us, or that she didn't think we'd want her around if we turned over a new leaf?"

"Yes." Maxie paused, then backtracked. "Both. Courtney was never entirely stable, but I never would have believed..."

"She promised to come back," Tabitha pointed out. "All we have to do is wait."

"And how long will that take?" Maxie waved at the door. "I need her! If I wanted something done around here, I'd look to one of you to get it done right! Now there's only two of us in charge, and I'm not convinced Team Magma can survive like this."

Tabitha held out his arms for a hug. Maxie glared at him until he stopped. "We'll make it work," Tabitha promised. "Nothing can stop Team Magma! Except twelve-year-olds on a Pokedex adventure, of course."

* * *

Brendan and May had found the final member of the long-forgotten Winstrate family. For all his relatives had talked about him, Brendan had almost expected Vito to be in the League building already.

What he got was an evolved Shuppet and disappointment.

"Did he really use his full team?" Brendan asked, like he didn't believe it. "Was that it?"

"I think so," May said sadly, as if she, too, was disappointed. "There were only three Pokémon."

"My family does think I'm the greatest thing since peanut butter," Vito explained, as if he was used to this kind of behavior. "I'm not surprised you expected me to be Champion."

"We didn't expect that much," May clarified, and then immediately started backtracking. "I mean, um, we expected to see you in the League building, but we haven't actually heard much of you from your parents, other than that you were on a trainer journey and probably had all your badges."

"If that's all they did," Vito said, "then I'm even more surprised than you are." He didn't sound offended at all. "I should go and visit again."

"Calling works just as well," May promised. "I haven't seen my dad in person since I left Littleroot Town, but he knows I still love him."

Brendan thought back to how little he'd called his own parents, and wondered if he should be feeling a little guilty. He decided no, they'd kicked him out of the house before he'd spent the night there. "So you're giving up the Championship?"

"I'm postponing it," Vito corrected. "I'm going to go and battle all of them again, and show off how much stronger I've become. Then I'll come back and challenge the Elite Four." He smiled, nothing mean-spirited at all. "To you, I wish nothing but luck."

Even if it didn't mean much, it was nice to know that Brendan could beat the entire family.

* * *

Matt had left before Archie and Shelly could finish their speech. He-with-the-forgettable-name had gone with him.

Matt's leaving, in itself, was not an unusual occurrence. It was when he had not returned after six hours that drew their concern.

"This isn't good," a female grunt commented. "It's not like Matt or Billy to go off like that."

Something about the name didn't feel right to Archie, but he couldn't figure out how to correct it. "Did they mention anything before they left? Anything _useful_ ," he stressed, understanding the typical grunt mentality far too well.

"Not really," the grunt answered, not offended at all. "Mr. Matt said 'Fifth of September,' but that was just telling the rest of the grunts to keep his guess the betting pool."

Ah, yes. _That._ He needed to have a long talk with the grunts about gambling - that it could easily grow to be a problem, and especially that he usually wanted in on it. "Which betting pool?"

"I don't know," she answered, more innocent than he'd expected. "I'm not good at managing money, they know I'd never be able to pay up for a loss."

"And this has nothing to do with our loss to those kids?"

"No, sir," the grunt answered immediately. Then she stopped. "Probably."

Archie barely restrained his temper, and he dismissed the grunt and told her to bring in Shelly. The grunt worked quickly, and brought in his first mate in only minutes.

Shelly jumped right in. "Did you figure out where they went?"

Archie's little bubble of hope burst. "I thought you might have had an idea. Did you put the tracking devices on the uniforms like I asked?"

"I talked you out of that," Shelly reminded him. "And Matt decided that shirts were for losers, anyway. We couldn't have found him, unless we'd put it on his belt."

"We should have."

"I know we should have. Let's talk about what is happening because we didn't."

Archie didn't object, and started clicking a pen in mild frustration. "The only lead we have is the fifth of September," he told her, "and even that isn't a sure return date. It could just as easily be one last bet."

Shelly momentarily looked uncomfortable. "That isn't the only lead," she finally admitted. "He left a message with one of the grunts. Something about spending the past seven years as a third wheel and deciding to go and 'give us some space' or something stupid like that."

Archie stopped his pen-clicking. "The girl was right," he said slowly. "Our entire team _did_ ship us."

"She's surprisingly observant," Shelly agreed. "Given the right topic. Romance does appeal to girls her age."

For a moment, there was an awkward silence, each trying to address the topic in a way that wouldn't sound romantic to an outside observer, such as a grunt or an audience looking from behind a screen.

Finally, Archie decided to just walk the plank, such as it was. "Matt can take care of himself," he decided. "And if that's all he's going to give us, then who needs him?" He stopped, and then spoke before the awkwardness could settle again. "I'm going to move on to Mossdeep. I don't want to stay in the base when I can pretend we won. You can come, I've always imagined you standing beside me as I looked over my kingdom."

"Will there be cops?"

"Most likely," Archie said without a pause. "Brendan has agents there, and we'll probably get arrested for trying to flood the world even if the creepy twins don't see us. Let's make our last day of freedom something we'll remember."

Shelly didn't need to be told twice.

* * *

Of all the people Brendan had expected to see at the end of Victory Road, Wally was not one of them.

Looking back, he should have seen it. After all, while he and May were operating the majority of Team Breakneck missions, Wally had gotten into a few incidents with one team or another himself. It shouldn't have come as a surprise to anyone that he'd gotten stronger.

It still surprised Brendan. "You beat all eight Gyms already?"

Wally smiled proudly. "I sure did!" he announced, and opened his Badge Case. "First Wattson, then Flannery, then Roxanne and Norman...it's amazing what you can do when you only have two or three encounters with evil teams."

"But don't you have to go through Fortree to get to Mossdeep and Sootopolis?" May asked. "You were with Winona at the time that Brendan challenged Juan."

"I had a teleporting Pokémon with me at the time. My starter had babies," he added quickly. "The other trainer didn't want them, so I was raising them to find the best Gardevoir of my own."

"You're breeding for battles?" May asked, and Wally tried to carefully phrase his answer.

"Kind of. More like accidental breeding from two guys leaving their Pokémon unsupervised. The fact that they were even more built for battle than either parent was just a bonus." Wally didn't seem to care. "I did the research, and the 'breeder' thing sounds like an option after I become honorary Champion."

"Speaking of the Championship," Brendan cut in, still in shock, "you beat _all eight Gyms_? Since I left you in Mauville?"

"There's a lot of things I never told you about," Wally said cryptically. "And I was going to challenge you to a battle to show it!"

Well, if there was one thing Brendan understood, it was battles. And even he admitted he was a little bit curious. "Then I have one thing to say: Banette, do the thing!"

Wally carefully thought out his options, and then made his choice. "Magneton, don't let me down!"

* * *

 **Pokémon teams:**

 _Brendan: Adam, Breloom, Aggron, Grumpig, Banette, Beldum_

 _May: Jerry, Masquerain, Pikachu, Torkoal, Latias, Dusky_


	34. Brendan and the Elites

**EDITOR'S NOTE: "Just a warning - I wrote and edited this chapter almost completely alone in one week, while the internet was down for most of it. There was a lot of caffeine and pencil-related pain involved, and I didn't do anything I wanted to with Glacia. But I got it done."**

Brendan eventually discovered that Wally had a Key Stone himself. Both of them had saved their Megas for the final round, and now it was Mega Aggron against Mega Gallade.

It was not a good match. He should have saved Banette for the Ralts evolution. He still had Grumpig standing, and if necessary he could switch to Beldum and a Revive or two. But he had expected a _Gardevoir,_ and Steel-types had an advantage over Fairy-types...

May had no comment on the type match, choosing something different. "Where did you find a Galladite?"

"Item trades," Wally replied. "Found an Audinite. Swapped it to a girl who said she was from Unova." He switched his attention back to the battle. "Gallade, Close Combat!"

"Forget it," Brendan said as his Mega took the hit. "Come back, Aggron, let's have Grumpig handle this!"

Mega Aggron gave him a grateful smile as she disappeared. Grumpig might not have had a Mega, but he had enough of an advantage over Gallade's Fighting-type to make the Psychic part irrelevant.

A few Psyshock attacks later, Mega Gallade stumbled backward to Wally, fell to his knees, and after a few moments of trying to get back up, conceded defeat like the warrior he was.

Wally called him back, and it seemed like he was trying not to scold his Pokémon. "I thought training would be enough to beat you," he said, clearly bitter about the loss. "I even evolved my Kirlia into Gallade so I could get rid of his Fairy-type weakness to your Aron or whatever she was when we battled last. And you still defeated me."

Brendan patted Grumpig on the head as he fed him a red Pokeblock. "It's amazing how strong you get when you're stalked by evil teams at every turn." At Wally's childish reaction, he laughed. "We're still friends, right?"

"I guess." Wally looked down at his Pokeballs again, then up at May. "What about you? Have you been in more Contests?"

"No," she answered. "Too busy saving the world to wait for the next rank of Cool contests. I caught a Torkoal and Absol for when I get back to it, though."

Wally looked impressed. "Do you have an Absolite?" he asked excitedly. "Because if you don't, I know where to get one. Or maybe a Swampertite, that's a little harder but..."

"I have a Mega," May interrupted. "I wouldn't mind an Absolite for Contests, but my La...um, this one is good enough for battle."

Wally remained unimpressed. "I know you have a Latias," he said, and she whistled innocently. "I talked to your dad."

"But I like to keep her secret from outsiders. An Absolite will be fun. What do you want me to do for it?"

"I want a battle with Latias," Wally said, as if it was an everyday occurrence that he ran into a legendary trainer. "According to myth, she and Latios were closer to demigods than full-blown Olympus-dwellers. If I battle her, I might have a chance to win."

"So I get the Absolite if I beat you?"

"Or if you lose. I just want a chance."

"Are you part of a Mega Stone black market?" Brendan asked suddenly. "Do you buy stolen Mega Stones from people?"

"What?" Wally wasn't even offended, just surprised. "I find them or buy them from specialists, like everyone else. What have _you_ been getting into since our last face-to-face meeting?"

Brendan stayed quiet. Wally took that to mean he'd won. "I'm going to train more. I have the Elite Four and Champion coming up, and if I lost against _Brendan_ , I can't be expected to win against them." Brendan joke-punched his arm. Wally had recovered from his mystery illness enough to punch back. "But Brendan might want to give it a shot. They might take it easier on somebody who stopped two criminal organizations from destroying the world."

"Really?" Brendan turned to May. "Then we have to go and prove our identities. Let's go."

"I'm not helping you battle," May objected.

"Then don't. Just be a good little cheerleader." May glared. Brendan grinned. "Now, onward to victory!"

* * *

Brendan didn't spend much time at the Pokémon Center/Pokemart fusion. He dropped his Pokémon with the nurse, decided to go and spend all of his money on Full Restores and Revives, and then he picked them up. There wasn't much to tell.

"It's too bad that Beldum didn't evolve like Steven promised," Brendan said as they went into the first chamber. "I was looking forward to having a Metang."

"Look on the bright side," May told him. "Maybe it'll evolve before you reach the Champion. There's still hope."

The door to the next room swung open, distracting Brendan from what he was about to say. That was probably a good thing.

The man waiting for them was almost entirely bald, only a small puff of hair at the front of his head. Before Sootopolis, Brendan might have made fun of it. Now, he didn't even blink, only wished that the guy had gone for a Mohawk instead.

"So," he said, starting the conversation before the man could introduce himself, "what type do you use?"

"That was fast." The man had been warned about Brendan, that much May could guess by the total lack of surprise. "I use Dark-types, but shouldn't you let me make a speech first?"

"I'm done with speeches," Brendan said. "I've had to listen to eight Gym Leaders and two wannabe supervillains make them all through my journey. I came for a battle, not a conversation."

"But I'm paid to make the speech!"

"Then speech over the battle," Brendan suggested. "I guarantee I will not be listening." He pitched a ball. "Breloom, do the thing!"

The man didn't protest. "I'm Sidney," he said, "and this is my Absol!"

* * *

"I have to admit," May said as they moved down the hallway separating Sidney from the second Elite, "it's nice to see what Dusky's capable of."

"Dusky's a Contest Absol," Brendan reminded her. "He has a long way to go before he's your first choice in battle."

"But I don't want to be an Elite. I just want to teach him some better moves, and get Wally to give me that Absolite he promised."

"I guess." Brendan stopped in front of the door, considering something. "Can we make a trade, here and now? My Banette, your Latias."

"You want to use a _legendary_ to battle the Elite Four?"

"Why not?" Brendan almost faked innocence, but he caught himself in time. May could see right through it. "I have a friend who has a Latias. There is nothing in the trainer rules that says legendaries can't be used as weapons to demolish the Elite Four. Why not take advantage of it?"

"I can think of plenty of reasons why not," May said immediately. "The first being that I don't trust you, but the second is that Latias is _mine,_ not yours."

"Haven't you ever learned to share?"

"Haven't _you_ ever learned the rest of the trainer's rulebook? If someone doesn't want to trade, you accept it instead of pressuring them."

"Fine." Brendan sighed dramatically. "I'll go through the Elite Four completely Legendary-free. Happy?"

"Very," May answered, entirely serious, and pulled him into the next room.

The second Elite was a pretty young woman, mid-twenties at most, with enormous flowers in her hair and dressed more for a beach than for work. Brendan prepared himself for a Grass or Ground user, but stopped before he sent in Grumpig.

The woman was reading. Out loud. In an empty room.

Brendan immediately altered his strategy. This was clearly either Ghost or Fairy, and given how dark the room was...

The woman looked up. "Hi," she said, her voice soft even now. "I'm Phoebe, the Ghost master."

Yeah, he'd called that one. "You read to ghosts?"

Phoebe nodded happily. "They come to me, so I hang out with them. I don't have that many living friends."

Not even Brendan could say something about that. "Choose your Pokémon," he said. "Your dead friends want entertainment, so maybe they can watch."

Phoebe's smile brightened. "They already are," she promised, as if she saw nothing wrong with the statement. "All of them."

On instinct, both heroes turned around. They saw absolutely nothing, of course, and May let the chill run down her spine.

Brendan, on the other hand, tried to suppress his fear. "And that was an excellent demonstration of _why_ the living don't like to hang out with you."

"That's mean!" Phoebe picked her choice Pokémon off of the table. "Banette, time to play!"

Brendan's choice had long been made. "Adam, do the thing!"

* * *

Phoebe was stronger than Brendan had expected. Her Banette had known Psychic (the attack, as he'd needed clarification when she'd given the order) and had nearly won. But thanks to Blaze Kick and a same-type power-up, Adam had managed to pull through.

Now the kids were in the third hallway, and they already knew exactly what type this person used. Torkoal had been called out to be a living space heater. When they walked through that door, the third of Hoenn's Elites already had a ball in hand.

"You are Brendan and May?" she asked. "The saviors of Hoenn?"

"That's us." Brendan raised a fist in a mockery of cheesy action cartoons. "You must be the Glacia that Phoebe mentioned. I accept your unconditional surrender."

"You will not be getting it. I take my job very seriously." She looked over at Torkoal. "Is this the Pokémon you will be using?"

"He's not mine," Brendan said immediately. "He's my friend's. What Pokémon are you going to use?"

Glacia looked down at the ball in her hand, moved to put it away, and reconsidered. "Walrein, go!"

Brendan had initially planned on using Adam again, but Walrein was a Water-type as well. His second choice came immediately. "Aggron, do the thing!"

As Aggron took her place on the field, Glacia noticed the Aggronite hidden under her armor. "Aggronite?"

"Would anything else work?" Brendan raised the hand with his Key Stone. "Aggron, Mega Evolve!"

* * *

With the loss of her Water-type weakness, Mega Aggron could Rock Smash her way to victory. Glacia let them go, but warned them about Brendan's final Elite opponent.

"Drake uses Dragon-type Pokémon," she said, "and only Dragon, Ice and Fairy attacks do decent damage. You don't look like a boy who uses any of those."

"I'm not," Brendan confessed, "but I have a plan. I'll go in and try to convince Drake that giving me a free pass to the Champion is a good idea."

"He won't fall for it," May tried to say, but Brendan held up a hand to demand silence.

"I am the son of a Gym Leader," he reminded her. "You are the daughter of Hoenn's top researcher. What happened to 'forget the rules, we have connections?' I thought that would be Team Breakneck's motto."

"Wally doesn't have connections."

"But he's the only one - and he's got the rest of us. Besides, we're the saviors of Hoenn! The region owes us!"

"Wallace unlocked the Sky Pillar so Rayquaza could save Hoenn," May told him. Brendan pretended he didn't hear her. "Fine, you can talk to Drake. Just don't go expecting special treatment from him."

Brendan, almost as if proving her wrong was his favorite pastime, started on his way down the hall to Drake's chamber.

* * *

Drake really didn't look like a man who would let anyone pass, even if they defeated him in battle. Or maybe it was just his impressive mustache making him look much stricter than he was. May didn't think so - the guy was wearing a coat opened with no shirt under it despite his close proximity to Glacia's room. He was either one of the toughest men on the planet, or one of the dumbest.

"Brendan and May?" he asked. The kids immediately confirmed. "The Champion told me that he wants to test you himself, so let's skip the rest of the introduction and start the battle." He tossed his Pokeball. "Get him, Salamence!"

Brendan's thought process crashed. A Salamence was part Flying-type, leaving Adam and Breloom out. It could learn Flamethrower, leaving Aggron useless. There were probably some Dark-type moves, too, so that took out Grumpig and Banette. And he didn't even consider Beldum, the thing hadn't even evolved despite Steven's promise...

"Time out!" May called. Brendan and Drake both stared at her. "I have to heal Brendan's Pokémon, I forgot to do it in the hall. Come on, Brendan!"

She dragged him into a corner before he could ask, and had released Aggron to give her a Full Restore. "What are you planning?" he managed after a moment to think.

"You and I both know your Pokémon probably can't take what Salamence throws out," May said, not even whispering, so quietly Brendan had to strain to hear. "So we'll cheat. Cheat like we've never cheated before. I'll give Aggron some Leppa Berries, too, and you take Jerry. Pass me Breloom, I know you want Beldum to get experience."

Brendan wanted to say 'Look at you, almost evil!' But he kept his mouth shut as he took Jerry's ball from her bag strap, as carefully as a second-grader stealing a cookie, and called Aggron back. Then he made sure Drake saw him give her Breloom, and said clearly, "This battle should be quick. You heal him for the next one."

Drake might have noticed. It was hard to tell. But even if he did, he didn't seem to care. "And what Pokémon do you choose?"

Brendan threw the ball as hard as he could. "Jerry, do the thing!"


	35. The Champion Twist

**In which the editor gets to see her favorite Hoenn character again. In his Emerald outfit, even.**

They managed to beat Drake by cheating, if it could really be called that - trading Pokémon was perfectly legal and they had been doing it for most of their journey. If they got caught, all they had to do was claim ignorance.

Getting caught looked increasingly unlikely. If Drake even knew, he got his revenge by having his Salamence knock May's Swampert around, and he was close enough to winning that Brendan almost worried. But thanks to two Full Restores at the right times and Drake being limited to one, Brendan managed to pull through.

Drake let them pass after that, but he stopped them before he could close the door for the next challenger.

"Do you have a plan to battle the Champion?"

Brendan had some kind of plan, as much of a plan as he ever did. He wasted no time in telling Drake about it: "I was just going to make things up as I go. It's gotten me this far."

"That isn't a plan," Drake pointed out, "but I will give you the point that it counts as a strategy."

"That's thirty-one points for Slytherin," Brendan told May, "and Ravenclaw has twenty-five for all the times you knew what the legendaries were."

Drake didn't even question it. "My advice is to take the Champion seriously," he said as if he hadn't been interrupted. "No matter what you may hear...or see. I think part of his technique is keeping his opponents' guard down."

Brendan caught on. "How many times have you lost to the guy?"

"Four," Drake told him, "and counting. I wish you the best of luck, Brendan."

And he closed the door. May immediately made the trade back, taking Jerry right from Brendan's belt. Brendan watched her, pretending he wasn't scared. "Ready, May?"

"It's your show," was the quiet response. "I'm only here for inspiration and time out of Dad's lab. Are _you_ ready?"

"Nope." Brendan looked up at the Champion's door, and summoned all of his courage. "Now I am. Let's do the thing."

* * *

They'd seen the Champion before. They'd even seen him in a less Champion-worthy outfit before. He still had a certain color scheme, but now the most ridiculous thing was the cape.

The fact that they knew the Champion did not surprise either of them. That honor went to the fact that the Champion was Wallace.

"I was expecting Steven," Brendan said, mildly disappointed, as he put Adam's ball down.

Wallace wasn't surprised. "You have encountered Steven more often in your travels," he agreed, "but I was in the Hall of Fame myself and he recently asked me to take over. He apparently decided that avoiding you and having a bigger rock collection were more important than the duties of a Champion. So I left the Sootopolis Gym in Juan's hands once again and came to the League building."

"So that's why Juan came back," May said, reeling with understanding. "He said it was because you got arrested by the fashion police."

Wallace cringed. "Yes, well...the, eh, _costume_ does attract attention, and even after two years I tend to forget I'm not performing."

"And here I thought you'd lost a bet," Brendan commented.

"There was a little of that involved, as well."

The talk aside, Brendan was already making plans. Wallace was once the Sootopolis City Gym Leader, which implied a Water-type specialty. His first choice was obvious. "Breloom, do the thing!"

Wallace had been waiting for Brendan to make the first move, and immediately countered. "My choice...Ludicolo!"

A Water/Grass Pokémon. Brendan should have known he couldn't type-advantage his way to victory against a Champion.

* * *

Brendan had switched out for Banette, and she had taken down the Ludicolo and even mocked it.

That should have warned Brendan about what he was up against. Karma was another part of Wallace's battle strategy, and he used a Wailord to deliver it.

"Are you kidding?" Brendan had complained when he saw it. "All that thing has to do is roll over and my Pokémon is _dead!_ "

But despite his complaints, Brendan had Breloom for that. A Mega Drain after each of Wailord's Blizzard attacks and a Mach Punch after each non-damaging move, and Wailord eventually lost. Wallace had expected Mega Drain to run out of power, but Brendan gave Breloom a Leppa Berry. That left the Whiscash open for everything.

Then came Gyarados, the one Pokémon that Brendan actually knew Wallace had. By this point, Brendan was feeling pretty good about himself. As Champion, Wallace should have a Pokémon that could Mega Evolve, and Gyarados going part-Dark would be practically giving Breloom the match.

May managed to ruin that for him. "Don't think you've won because of a type advantage. He's the _Champion."_

"This guy couldn't teach his own niece to battle," Brendan called back. "I'm sure Gyarados is predictable."

Wallace kept his emotions off of his face, but May could tell that he was faking calm just like Brendan liked to fake innocence. May carefully looked him over for a Key Stone, thinking that it might be what was holding his cape to his shirt.

Brendan decided to switch out. Wallace probably could Mega Evolve Gyarados, so he should fight back with a Mega Aggron. It felt like the right thing to do.

After all, potentially super-effective moves were considerably less awesome than a Mega battle.

* * *

Wallace could, in fact, Mega Evolve his Gyarados.

He hadn't planned on doing so, and Gyarados, stubborn as it was, had initially decided to take on Aggron on its own. But once Brendan had brought out the Key Stone, they decided to give the boy what he really wanted.

Gyarados won. Changing its type to Water/Dark left it open for Rock Smash, but it knew Earthquake. Mega Aggron was no match for that.

Fortunately, Adam still knew Double Kick and Aggron had weakened it enough to get him comfortable against a Water-type. Gyarados didn't even get an attack in.

Brendan was very pleased with himself. "Your Mega's down," he said unnecessarily. "You can surrender at any time."

"And why would I do that? I still have two Pokémon left." Wallace's next Pokémon was clearly one he was most attached to, and Brendan briefly wondered why he didn't Mega Evolve that one. "Gyarados may have the Mega Stone, but let's not forget that I rose to fame not as a Gym Leader, but as a Contest star."

He released his Pokémon, and May squeaked. Even Brendan had to admit that it was beautiful. A Milotic, his Pokedex told him.

Pretty as it was, it still needed to go down. "Adam, come back! Grumpig, do the thing!"

"Ice Beam!" Wallace ordered, deciding to jump right into attacking.

"Psyshock!" Brendan retaliated, but Milotic's attack hit first. The Ice Beam left Grumpig cold, but not completely frozen, and the Psyshock didn't do as much damage as they'd hoped.

It was going to be much harder than Brendan had thought.

* * *

Brendan had lost five Pokémon. So had Wallace, and he had swapped Milotic for a Tentacruel halfway through the battle. Brendan had called Grumpig back out for that one, and Milotic had returned and gotten revenge.

So now it really was down to Beldum. Or it would have been, if Brendan hadn't used it as a necessary sacrifice to use a Max Revive on Breloom.

Now that Breloom and Milotic were both back on the field, it was time for the finishing blow.

"Mega Drain!"

And just like that, Milotic was down, and Brendan had defeated the Champion of Hoenn.

Wallace was not a sore loser. He actually said that he enjoyed the battle, and congratulated him on becoming honorary Champion. May gave Brendan a pointed look, as if to say _'This is how you handle a loss.'_

Brendan ignored her. "So do I get to take your job?"

"Of course not." Wallace opened his own secret door, and May did not get up from her seat. She knew where that door led. "You do get to see what I have back here."

"A zombie army?" Brendan asked, pretending he had no idea what Wallace was hiding.

"The Hall of Fame," Wallace said anyway. "I have not yet been able to raise the dead. That's Phoebe's task."

The Hall of Fame was actually pretty empty. The only things there were a giant healing machine hooked up to some form of computer with a camera, and plenty of pictures of other Champions.

Brendan saw the pictures of Steven and Wallace with their Pokémon, and tried to see if there were other people he knew, but Wallace drew his attention to the machine.

"A Pokémon League Champion," Wallace explained, "is sworn in with this, even if he or she does not take the job. You are now one of us. Place your Pokémon in there, and you will all be recognized forever...which is all you really want, I'm sure."

Brendan started to put Adam's ball down, but pulled it back up to ask Wallace a question. "Drake won't come in here, will he?"

"Drake?" Wallace didn't seem to understand. "I don't think so. He's happy where he is."

"Good." Brendan looked down at his Pokémon. "So when can I see my picture on the wall?"

* * *

A week later, May had managed to convince Norman to let her throw a party for Brendan in his Gym. It didn't take much, but she liked to exaggerate on it.

She'd invited Brendan's mother, all of the Gym Leaders and Elites, both Champions, the professor and his wife, and of course Wally and Lisia. At the moment, all of Team Breakneck was gathered in a semi-huddle, Lisia getting to know Wally and the twins by making fun of Wallace's drunk genie costume, which for reasons unknown, he was wearing again.

"I thought he would have burned it by now," Lisia commented. "Why did he wear it again?"

"My guess?" Brendan pointed toward the door as Flannery entered, looking mildly overwhelmed once again, until she saw Wallace and Steven, both slightly smug and very clearly anticipating her reaction.

The reaction was calm, all things considered. She merely looked Wallace right in the eyes and said, "You are not dressing our imaginary children."

Wallace's reply was just as calm. "I love you, too, darling."

This triggered Lisia's attention span, and she gestured at her uncle with something remarkably similar to rage. "So are you ever going to bother to give me an explanation for this, or what?"

"They're mocking the internet," Steven said at once.

"He won my hand in marriage through a poker game," Flannery explained.

"They're taking a joke too far," Winona added, not taking her eyes off of her Altaria, who was playing with Ali.

"Making headlines," Wallace corrected, "though the primary factor _is_ seeing how far we can push it. There's something most Champions have in common, and that is a love of misleading those simple-minded enough to believe what they're told without question. Flannery and I have just gone a step further than Steven did, because I don't have to pay her to play along."

Lisia sighed. "Forget I asked. Just say I'm a bridesmaid and pretend this whole conversation never happened."

"Already done." Flannery looked over at Brendan, almost curious. "So how is the whole Champion thing working for you so far?"

"Boring," Brendan answered, "but you probably knew that."

"I suspected." But she was grinning. "You topped your father's accomplishment, though. Isn't that what was motivating you?"

"And now I don't know what to do with myself," Brendan finished. "I'm not thought of as Norman's son anymore, he's thought of as Brendan's dad. I'm in the middle of an identity crisis."

"So find a hobby," Winona suggested. "I'm sure there are plenty of things for boys your age to do. You'll have homework soon enough."

All six kids covered their ears at the same time. Even Tate and Liza - apparently, being Gym Leaders was not good enough to get them out of school. It must have been a part-time job.

Brendan looked up before the rest, and saw Norman getting up from his conversation with Juan (about old man problems, no doubt, even though Norman was only in his thirties and Juan didn't look older than fifty) and looking through the window. Then, seeing his son, he called him over, just as the door to the Gym opened.

"We heard the kid defeated the Champion," a familiar, rough voice said, and Brendan's confusion matched Norman's. "Don't worry, we're here to congratulate him. No more making trouble."

May looked up, too, but she was not surprised to see Archie and Shelly there. "I didn't think you guys would actually do it," she said instead, glaring at the twins.

"Why wouldn't we?" Liza asked, faking innocence. "It was the least they can do."

"Besides," Tate added, "they would have shown up anyway, Team Magma's coming too."

"And who invited _them_?"

"Tabitha, probably," both twins said together.

Sure enough, Team Magma came to the door shortly after, where, after congratulating Brendan on his new title, Tabitha had to restrain Maxie to get him to stay. They stood awkwardly with Team Breakneck until Brendan had finished explaining to Norman that there were _probably_ not going to be any big dramatic battles to decide the fate of the world this time.

"How are you guys still out of jail?" Brendan asked, and the former villains' heads all turned to Tate and Liza. The Gym Leaders shared a short telepathic conversation, and then the clarification began.

"They did get arrested," Tate started. "Liza and I just got them out with a combination of bribery, Gym Leader authority, and Jedi mind tricks. They're out of prison, but we're their wardens."

"And the judges," Liza added. "We decided to sentence them to Team Breakneck initiations. And then we put them online."

"So what did they do?" Brendan asked, almost begging for a chance to watch.

Tate made awkward eye contact with May, and broke it off immediately so he could use his words. "Well, since Liza ships anything with a pulse..."

"And Tate has a not-so-secret interest in really bad romantic comedies..."

"Only for making fun of them, I swear..."

"We decided to make them all read off a script we wrote for the world's worst mermaid romance, casting Shelly as the mermaid and Archie as the pirate who fishes her up and falls in love with her." Liza shot the humiliated pair a smug look. "And then the Biscuit Incident got out of hand and we had to cut the scene," she finished.

"Let's not talk about the biscuits," Shelly hissed.

"Fine." Liza pointed to Maxie and Tabitha. "And the skinny dude can't act. _At all_. The other guy's decent, but not really the 'rival sea captain' type."

Lisia's eyes lit up. "Where did you upload this? I will _pay you_ to let me see this."

"It's free."

"Better."

Brendan didn't care as Archie and Shelly tried to object, or even that they eventually left to 'walk the plank' or something. He only really cared about the people he was watching with.

He hadn't had many friends, even in Johto. But now he had not only a best friend in May and faithful companions in his Pokémon, but all of Team Breakneck (including the former villains, if forced) would stand behind him whenever he asked.

And that the twins were horrible script writers. But if he could handle Archie and Maxie, he could handle a bad thirty-minute short film where the actors had learned their lines in about the same time span.

He could handle anything.


	36. Epilogue

**We'll meet again, don't know where, don't know when...**

 **But Super Effective was fun while it lasted. Stay awesome.**

 _Two years later_

Brendan had spent the last two years with no interference from an evil organization and no badge quest. Instead, he spent his time learning to cook with his mom, playing video games, and taking challengers like a real Champion. He even took a job as a practice battle for Norman.

He built a Secret Base just outside of Rustboro and pretty much lived there, but for today he was back at his parents' house, making a grocery list so his mom could buy him food, when he heard a knock at the door.

Lisia was waiting, and greeted him with a smile that still managed to distract him from reality. "I'm here on a mission," she said, after barely a hello. "As you know, my birthday's in a few weeks, and I want to ask you to come to my party. We won't be party age forever, you know," she added, tugging on her sleeve again. "My uncle even offered to give a battle demonstration for the guests, since most of us are Contest types."

Brendan snapped back to the present day. "Your uncle hates me," he reminded her.

"No he doesn't." Lisia seemed sure about that. "If he hated you, he'd be almost scarily polite...and maybe throw dog poop on your roof."

Brendan, who had trouble imagining Wallace even touching dog poop with a shovel, immediately asked for the story behind that specific situation. Lisia refused to give it.

"Are you coming to the party or not?" she asked instead.

"Why not? You've met my parents. Maybe I can meet your whole family."

* * *

 _'As far as the organization could tell, there were no warning signs._

 _One day, the young man came into work, did his job, and clocked out, as always. The next, he had blown up half the base and stolen their crowning achievement. But Wes had seen the wrong in what he was doing...'_

May stared in disgust at the words, knowing that it was wrong but not sure how to fix it. Dusky, her test audience, perfectly mirrored her disgusted expression as he, too, focused too much on the little spots on the screen.

"No," May said out loud. "No, that is not something a publisher would want to see."

She fell back on her bed and closed the laptop, reaching for her dream journal instead. She'd known that writing would be hard, but did everything she did have to be _wrong_?

She shouldn't complain. She was fourteen and working from a dream she barely remembered. She had plenty of time and a Cool Contest championship to make the publishers notice her.

But she'd really thought she was going somewhere with this one.

Dusky's head cut into her vision, his eyes silently asking a question. She pushed herself up, giving him a reassuring smile. "I'll get it someday," she promised, and Dusky glanced back at the computer. "In the meantime, I think I'll look up something I probably won't need to know right now. I've always wondered how to make explosives..."

 **"Do you WANT to get arrested?"** Dusky demanded, once again forgetting that May was not one of those lucky humans that could understand Pokémon-speak. **"The last thing you need is to be on some kind of watch list because of your research. It's bad enough you're getting baby supply ads because you dared to look up pregnancy symptoms."**

But, amazingly, she didn't open the computer. Instead, she reached for another one of her many, many notebooks, this one looking like an ancient leather-bound volume but was actually hard. Dusky recognized it as her 'spell book.'

"I'd better do that later," she said, cracking it open. "Dad's at the lab and I'm too lazy to go and tell him that I'm learning how to make high explosives. Witchcraft is way more fun, anyway."

Though he wasn't exactly convinced by her phrasing, Dusky settled down, knowing that there was not, at the moment, a chance that she could end up in prison.

* * *

Brendan and May had been through a lot together. The journey was only the beginning, and as corny as it sounded, their friendship really did get stronger with every passing day.

Of course, their other adventures had been boring in comparison. Even their trip to mall jail was short-lived, as Dusky had gone to the professor immediately and talked him into getting them out.

But that was a long time ago. This was now.

"I got an invitation to Lisia's fifteenth birthday party," Brendan announced when May walked into his back yard that night for their weekly chat.

May laughed and playfully punched his arm. "Way to go, man! They're usually Contest star-exclusive, since she has a hard time making friends outside of performances."

Brendan saw right through it. "You got invited, too, didn't you?"

"Yep." May stretched out on the grass, looking up at the stars. Tate and Liza (mostly Tate, not that she'd told Brendan that) had taught her a few important things, but she could never really make out any real constellations. "And Chaz, too. And I think all of Team Breakneck got invitations this year, since she didn't really know them that well the first time."

There was something else she was trying to hide, but Brendan knew what it was without even trying. "You're shipping me with Lisia, aren't you?"

"What?" May faked innocence. "You accuse me of shipping real people?"

"Don't try that on me," Brendan threatened. "I'm the one who got you in the habit in the first place."

"Come on, Brendan. When have I ever shipped real people before?"

"Archie and Shelly."

The answer was instant, and May was glad it was dark. She didn't want Brendan to see her blushing in embarrassment. He would never let it go if he did.

"That doesn't count," May protested. "I only ship real people if they're actually canon. Or when the only thing stopping them from being a thing is because one of them is the other's boss. With Archie and Shelly, I think it's both now."

If it wasn't, Brendan thought, he would be very surprised. Two years with no Team Aqua business would really clear up a schedule. But he didn't want to face the wrath of the remains of Team Aqua yet.

"Does Lisia do dress-up parties?" he asked instead. "I know she and Wallace are combining battles and contests to show off to the rest of Team Breakneck, but will I need a suit?"

"I don't know," May confessed to the sky, "but I'm sure that if you do, Laura can make you a new outfit."

Yes, there was that. Even though Laura had been the one to create the drunk genie costume, she'd done good work with Lisia and May and Pikachu over the years. There was enough trust there.

"What about presents?" he asked, changing the subject. "She's a celebrity, and so is her uncle. What do you get a celebrity?"

"I don't know about you, but I'm writing her a fanfic for her obscure OTP. You don't have the creativity to do more than a little picture, though, so maybe you can find a new Pokémon. I think she said something about trying to take the Gym challenge this summer, while Wallace is still active Champion. If she starts out with two instead of one, she can catch them at weaker stages without the worry of Ali squashing them all." She tapped her chin. "Or food. Food is always a good option, a love of chocolate is pretty much hardwired into girl biology."

"Food?" Brendan repeated, not sure if he'd heard right.

"Food," May said, proving him right. "Food, a new Pokémon, or something sparkly. She likes sparkles."

So no matter what his choice was, it was potentially embarrassing. But he was sure he could handle a little bit of embarrassment.

Then again, Groudon and Kyogre hadn't been this hard to think of.

"Brendan?" May snapped her fingers in front of his face. "You ok?"

"Huh?" Brendan snapped back to attention. "Yeah, whatever. How's your other writing thing working out?"

She groaned. "Not good at all," she answered after a long, pained silence. "I can't even find out a _beginning_ despite having the outline done..."

"You've got time," Brendan promised, pleased that he'd distracted her. "So what if you don't get published until you're sixty?"

"You're right," May agreed. "I don't have a _real_ criminal record, I can hold a job. Unlike some people, who will have to work for their fathers for the rest of their lives."

"That is _low."_

And, fighting and laughing as always, their journey continued.

In a more quiet, less destructive direction this time.


End file.
